Lost Finale: Now With (Something Like) Coherancy!
SONS OF BITCHES. Because I was completely driving myself NUTS through this ep, trying to figure out where the HELL this chapter fit into Jack's backstory, because I really didn't think he'd ever had a period where he sunk that low before bouncing back up and then at th end I'm waiting to see who gets out of the car, because, duh, it's gonna be some kind of big deal at this point and it's......KATE. IT WASN'T A FLASHBACK. IT WAS THE FUTURE. OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT.
OH MY GOD. My hands are flailing all over the place. OH MY GOD.
But, really, talk about raising more questions than answers! I mean, of course, we still have no real idea HOW they get off the island, we just know that they DO (those clever clever sick writing bastards).
And, whoa, CHRISTIAN IS **STILL ALIVE**?? I mean, yeah, there was that whole thing in Season One with Jack not finding his body but WHAT-WHAT. Of course, after the Cooper/Sawyer/Locke Daddy incident...the island is magick, clearly. BUT STILL. OMGWTFBBG.
Okay, yeah, I guess we never actually SAW Christian, so maybe Jack just pretended to be writing presciptions as him, but that doesn't really cover the "Call my dad, I'll bet he's drunker than I am!" freakout. Unless Jack has just done up and LOST HIS FOOL MIND. Which...eh, liklier than not at this point, I guess.
(Also, in case you missed it/didn't know/whatever: Oxycodone is a painkiller. A pretty hefty one, if memory serves. Oh, Jack.
But srsly, what up with all the TV doctors abusing painkillers? This makes three on the shows I watch, and I don't even know about the rest of you. And, considering that the other two I'm thinking of are Baltar and House...step away from the pills, Captain Doctor Hero Jack. STEP. AWAY.)
Oh, and WHO THE FUCK DIED?? I think they might have been trying to make us think it was Sawyer, but Kate's "he'll wonder where I am" line pretty much kills that dead, I think (because who else could the "he" be in that sentence? if she's not with Jack, she's with Sawyer, and I think anyone can figure THAT island mystery out).
It's someone with no friend or family left...judging from Kate's "Why would I go?" reaction, right now my vote's on either Ben or Locke. Because, it has to be someone that would wind up alone and clearly not fit in back in the real world, and someone that the castaways that have readjusted and want to forget the island (Kate) would be disgusted and want nothing to do with, but that someone who hasn't readjusted and wants to go back to the island (Jack) would be disturbed by the death by.
PHEW. Meanwhile, on the island (there's an island on this show? OH RIGHT, YEAH)...
Jack: "I TOLD YOU I WUZ HARDCORE." (Holy shit, did he lose it on Ben or what there, seriously? I was cheering and screaming silently, inside, AT THE SAME TIME.)
Locke: "I TOLD YOU I WUZ HARDCORE TOO." (Back from the deeeead!! I was...half-convinced he might have bought it, not gonna lie. But, NO, he's back, complete with new freaky-ass visions. And a GUN. And a KNIFE.)
Rousseau: "WELL, I'M STILL MORE HARDCORE THAN BOTH OF YOU." (Seriously, I am not sure what is made of more awesome...the elbow to the face, or the way that she tenderly embraces her daughter and speaks to her for the first time in sixteen years: "Will you help me tie him up?" Bondageing! Yay!)
Juliet: Kind of makes me want to love her just for THE MOST AWESOME LINE EVER. (AND SAWYER's REACTION? JUST MAKES IT BETTER. People, he effin' SMIRKED!!)
Sayid: Kills people with HIS FEET.
Hurley: Kills people with A VAN. BIG DAMN HERO.
Charlie: BIG DAMN HERO AND I CRY. I'm not sure what gets me more, him being all smartass/badass with Greta and Bonnie there (and, BTW, the hell was Bonnie's problem anyway? bitch loves to hit, I tell you what), his cheerful "so much for fate" bit near the end, or the way he was dying but STILL MADE SURE DESMOND KNEW ABOUT THE BOAT OH GOD (talk about your retroactivity, after all the non-sharing of information at the beginning of this series!)
Sawyer: I CRY SOME MORE, AND A LOT.
Desmond: I CRY. IN GENERAL, I CRY.
Ben: "I didn't want him to get you pregnant. I suppose I overreacted." Oh my god, I love this horrifying terrifying effed-up strange strange crazyass little man SO MUCH and I DON'T KNOW WHY.
Mikhail: IS A FUCKING RUSSIAN ZOMBIE. WHAT. WHY WILL YOU NOT DIE??!? I'm not even frustrated so much as BOGGLED and VAGUELY TERRIFIED. Because I saw we were missing a body but didn't catch which one at first and then Mikhail's waving a grenade at the window and OH MY GOD ARE YOU SHITTING ME?? WHAAAAT. He's. Still. NOT. DEAD. Oh my god, he's FUCKING GRIGORI RASPUTIN.
......um, does anyone know when the new season starts??