too much :|
i haven't wrote in forever..
just sometimes i need to get itt out
you know get it out so i don't have to feel it inside
well i don't talk to ryan anymore
after that one night i drank a whole bottle and kinda puked on him
(at least that's what they said happened
in actuality i don't remember anything after
i held up the empty bottle of vodka like
ohh fuck
well i don't talk to sav anymore
last time i saw him was thanksgiving night........
snuck out of the house at 2 in the morning
we cruised around town
but you know all good things come to an end
he has a girlfriend now but that never stopped him before
i know i'm going to get a goddamn fucking call like later this week
and i won't be able to resist it
what is about him?
is everyone like that about their first love?
i don't know but if they are then i think
we're all just fucked
i just can't believe how hard it is to breathe sometimes
like when you take a breath and these tears well up
and you're like sitting there with your family
trying not to breathe or speak or move
because you know if you do any of those
you''ll start crying then they get concerned and
when they get concerned it's all over
concerned=talking to a crazy doctor, checks to make sure you're not
CUTTING YOURSELF
because that's about as crazy as it gets right?
or not
i'm not going back there
back in the concerned direction
because i can't take it
can't take the constant reminder that
i'm not normal
it's not normal to feel like this
i know it's not but i can't stop it or fight it
i just don't know why
but really who is "normal" anyway?
just sometimes i need to get itt out
you know get it out so i don't have to feel it inside
well i don't talk to ryan anymore
after that one night i drank a whole bottle and kinda puked on him
(at least that's what they said happened
in actuality i don't remember anything after
i held up the empty bottle of vodka like
ohh fuck
well i don't talk to sav anymore
last time i saw him was thanksgiving night........
snuck out of the house at 2 in the morning
we cruised around town
but you know all good things come to an end
he has a girlfriend now but that never stopped him before
i know i'm going to get a goddamn fucking call like later this week
and i won't be able to resist it
what is about him?
is everyone like that about their first love?
i don't know but if they are then i think
we're all just fucked
i just can't believe how hard it is to breathe sometimes
like when you take a breath and these tears well up
and you're like sitting there with your family
trying not to breathe or speak or move
because you know if you do any of those
you''ll start crying then they get concerned and
when they get concerned it's all over
concerned=talking to a crazy doctor, checks to make sure you're not
CUTTING YOURSELF
because that's about as crazy as it gets right?
or not
i'm not going back there
back in the concerned direction
because i can't take it
can't take the constant reminder that
i'm not normal
it's not normal to feel like this
i know it's not but i can't stop it or fight it
i just don't know why
but really who is "normal" anyway?