Tolerance is a two way street.
So this is a Tumblr cross post. The original post was in response to reactions to someone talking about how bisexuality doesn't exist. It soon escalated into accusations (maybe unfounded, maybe not) of biphobia and hatred. This is my reply.
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Thinking something does not exist does NOT equal hate or biphobia. I am a great advocate for people being entitled to their own opinion, and I stick by that view, EVEN when confronted with opinions that are potentially hurtful to me (even though I’m not offended by this).
I know people who think bisexuality doesn’t exist and, while I don’t agree with them and I think it’s people like them who help aggravate the awful view of bisexuality in modern culture, I accept that that’s their view. And I don’t misinterpret it as hate.
Labelling someone as homophobic/biphobic, and getting angry with them about “hating on” bisexuality, is just as bad (IMO) as someone labelling a bisexual as “confused” and hating on them! Can you see that it goes both ways? Tolerance is a two way street sometimes.
Let me give you an example: my friend recently came out to her parents about being bi. Her father is very supportive, but her mother holds the same view as the person above: she doesn’t believe bisexuality exists. Now, this is hurtful to my friend, and she’s trying to explain to her mother she’s wrong, but she’s also tolerant of her mother’s opinion, and isn’t shoving her relationship with her girlfriend in her mother’s face.
It’s called balance, people. We all need to be tolerant of each other. We’re so quick to criticise homophobes for not tolerating LGBTQA (etc etc), and we don’t accept the excuse that it’s hard for them to do it.
I know it’s hard for us to tolerate opinions like this, but it has to be done. If not, well, freedom of opinion would be a pretty lousy concept, wouldn’t it?
And I write this from the point of view of a pansexual person.
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Anyway, I thought you guys would find this interesting!
~Lili
EDIT: before you comment, have a look at the comment threads there are already, as I may have replied to any questions you have or already gone over the topic you want to talk about :)
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Thinking something does not exist does NOT equal hate or biphobia. I am a great advocate for people being entitled to their own opinion, and I stick by that view, EVEN when confronted with opinions that are potentially hurtful to me (even though I’m not offended by this).
I know people who think bisexuality doesn’t exist and, while I don’t agree with them and I think it’s people like them who help aggravate the awful view of bisexuality in modern culture, I accept that that’s their view. And I don’t misinterpret it as hate.
Labelling someone as homophobic/biphobic, and getting angry with them about “hating on” bisexuality, is just as bad (IMO) as someone labelling a bisexual as “confused” and hating on them! Can you see that it goes both ways? Tolerance is a two way street sometimes.
Let me give you an example: my friend recently came out to her parents about being bi. Her father is very supportive, but her mother holds the same view as the person above: she doesn’t believe bisexuality exists. Now, this is hurtful to my friend, and she’s trying to explain to her mother she’s wrong, but she’s also tolerant of her mother’s opinion, and isn’t shoving her relationship with her girlfriend in her mother’s face.
It’s called balance, people. We all need to be tolerant of each other. We’re so quick to criticise homophobes for not tolerating LGBTQA (etc etc), and we don’t accept the excuse that it’s hard for them to do it.
I know it’s hard for us to tolerate opinions like this, but it has to be done. If not, well, freedom of opinion would be a pretty lousy concept, wouldn’t it?
And I write this from the point of view of a pansexual person.
---
Anyway, I thought you guys would find this interesting!
~Lili
EDIT: before you comment, have a look at the comment threads there are already, as I may have replied to any questions you have or already gone over the topic you want to talk about :)