(no subject)
alone again, with my thoughts and pains. But, I'm getting used to that.
My hip's been hurting a lot lately, and it's because of my rheumatism. I will have to see a doctor as soon as posible, so I got an appointment for Monday, after work.
Maybe he'll just confirm what i already know, but I hope he can give me something for the pain, other than ibuprofin.
No better way to spend my birthday, than in the doctor's office, right?
Plus, I'm in my "I don't give a fuck about anything" phase. Yes, I am being a selfish bitch and I don't care or give a shit about anything.
I've had way too much time to think, and thought, we all know, are a dangerous thing.
Monday I turn 32, and somehow, somewhere I found myself thinking and looking back. I must be getting old, because I never, ever look back. As a rule.
But, in my last trip, as I couldn't sleep, I had a thought... and the another and then another and the ball got too big, I've been fucked up all week.
Yeah, I need an activity, but even though I work all day, I read, listen to music, clean the house and try to have every minute occupied in my life, my brain won't shut up.
I look back and I realized I haven't done anything I didn't plan.
Confusing, I know, but I feel like my life is on a trail to ... nowhere.
True, so far I've gained a lot, and I'm not just talking about weigth.
I have a new job that I like, even though the Boss is similar to Satan, I'm learning how to handle her and so far I haven't got any issues.
I have a man by my side who I love to pieces and makes me happy.
I have friends that understand and accept me as I am.
WTF is wrong with me then? I have no clue.
I'm just feeling stuck.
So, I guess I'll be shutting down my feelings system till further notice.
Today is my Dad's birthday, so Happy birthday Daddy, wherever you are. I miss you. I miss you so much, that, in between the fog I'm in, it hurts.
I didn't go to the cemetery because it hurts too much to look at a stone with your name on it. I rather remember you the way you were. Alive, happy, funny and my whole life and world.
yeh..
My hip's been hurting a lot lately, and it's because of my rheumatism. I will have to see a doctor as soon as posible, so I got an appointment for Monday, after work.
Maybe he'll just confirm what i already know, but I hope he can give me something for the pain, other than ibuprofin.
No better way to spend my birthday, than in the doctor's office, right?
Plus, I'm in my "I don't give a fuck about anything" phase. Yes, I am being a selfish bitch and I don't care or give a shit about anything.
I've had way too much time to think, and thought, we all know, are a dangerous thing.
Monday I turn 32, and somehow, somewhere I found myself thinking and looking back. I must be getting old, because I never, ever look back. As a rule.
But, in my last trip, as I couldn't sleep, I had a thought... and the another and then another and the ball got too big, I've been fucked up all week.
Yeah, I need an activity, but even though I work all day, I read, listen to music, clean the house and try to have every minute occupied in my life, my brain won't shut up.
I look back and I realized I haven't done anything I didn't plan.
Confusing, I know, but I feel like my life is on a trail to ... nowhere.
True, so far I've gained a lot, and I'm not just talking about weigth.
I have a new job that I like, even though the Boss is similar to Satan, I'm learning how to handle her and so far I haven't got any issues.
I have a man by my side who I love to pieces and makes me happy.
I have friends that understand and accept me as I am.
WTF is wrong with me then? I have no clue.
I'm just feeling stuck.
So, I guess I'll be shutting down my feelings system till further notice.
Today is my Dad's birthday, so Happy birthday Daddy, wherever you are. I miss you. I miss you so much, that, in between the fog I'm in, it hurts.
I didn't go to the cemetery because it hurts too much to look at a stone with your name on it. I rather remember you the way you were. Alive, happy, funny and my whole life and world.
yeh..