(no subject)
so that song still applies...but i dont get it...why do i bother? why do i still care so much? why do you do this me over and over again? why does it have to be like this? why wont you tell me? why cant i understand? why cant you get over yourself? why cant you take a hint? why are you such an ass? why are you so stubborn? why do you only care about yourself and 2 other people when i have attempted to invest so much in you? and why the hell do you do what you do? and why the hell do you still make me cry? i tear my heart open, i sew myself shut, and my weakness is that i care too much...
i try so hard...i swear to god i do...in almost everything you do...you may not think so but i am trying but at times im just so tired and frustrated after trying my best and it getting me nowhere for so long...im exhausted...mentally physically everything...just exhausted in every aspect of my life...and no matter what i do i can never be good enough for anyone...so why try? i just want to give up...its getting me nowhere...every effort that i make is still getting me nowhere...and i dont understand why i do the things that i do sometimes...even when i know it will only make a situation worse...
and why do people have to leave? graduate, move away, ditch you, whatever it is...why cant we forever just live in our old 8 year old world? but even that was hell for me at times...so no matter what you do...things will never turn out the way you want...
and still...im crying...