Brutal As A New York Summer, Chapter 5.
Title: Brutal As A New York Summer
Chapter: 5, 'Walmart Version Of You'
Author: Miss Capitaine/deliciouslycrzy
Rating: T( For language)
Genre: Angst/Romance
Characters: Zachary Nichols, Megan Wheeler, Margot Wheeler, Danny Ross
Pairings: Zach/Megan, Zach/Danny
Summary: ' (S)he's like a less cute version of you, but (s)he'll have to do.'
Warnings: N/A
Spoilers: 'Major Case', only because that was the episode where Wheeler went into labor and had Margot.
Disclaimer: I just realized that I needed a better disclaimer. * deep breath * I do not own Law & Order Criminal Intent, I make no such claims to the wonderful works of Dick Wolf, whom I both love and despise at the same time. If I did own L&OCI, it would most definitely need to be on HBO or some similar channel. I do, however, own Travis Dane, who lives in my closet and fixes my compute when needed. He's happy as long as I keep him stocked up with food and interactive leather and rubber bondage porno.
Note: Angst is back. Thank God, a territory that I'm familiar with. This one went by much quicker than the other ones, especially after I figured out where it was going. This fits the summer prompt vaguely, just because of the ice-cream thing. Oh, and the title and summary comes from the song 'Less Cute,' by Say Anything. Poor Zach. Poor Megan. At least I didn't torment Danny this time.
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For some reason he couldn't fathom, Zach didn't turn down Megan's offer to meet for ice-cream with her and Margot. It had come out of nowhere, a random phone call two weeks into her maternity leave, and he had been too shocked to come up with a clever, offhand him comment, so he had just muttered, “Uh, um, okay, when?” Once she had told him the time and place and had hung up, it finally hit him that he had agreed.
He would have groaned, but the cliché didn't escape him, so he just took a large gulp of his coffee. He didn't even wince as the hot liquid poured down his throat, and he could see the strange look Eames was giving him out of the corner of his eye.
He didn't like how she made him feel.
Awkward, mostly, a bit tingly, most definitely out of his element. A familiar feeling, but he drew a blank whenever he tried to connect the dots.
She wasn't his type; small, freckles, dainty, curves, feminine. His usual were men, for God's sake, and she was the absolute opposite that Zach usually went for. In looks, at least. Her personality... she was fiery, that was obvious, and she had learned to put up with his shit, which he knew from Danny, was an acquired skill, she wasn't afraid to get down and dirty- Zach winced at his choice of phrasing- and she was just... It was the way she talked, dealt with him, with his problems, it was familiar and it reminded him of someone and...
She was Megan Wheeler.
Megan fucking Wheeler, and Danny would have his head on a wall if he ever figured out that he was having these fantasies, the only way one could describe them really, what else could he call a thought that involved him shoving her up against their desks and having his way with her. She was Danny's little prodigy, the daughter he never had, basically, and even though Danny knew Zach (Biblically, as it were), it wouldn't stop him from going all Papa-bear if he so much got a whiff of the nasty thoughts currently whirling around Zach's head.
Which made it all the more exciting.
I must be a masochist.
He met her outside 1PP little over a half-hour later. She was pushing Margot in a stroller, and Zach made all of the obligatory cooing noises, until Megan pulled a face and laughed at him, so he stopped.
They chatted meaninglessly for awhile, as they walked side by side towards the closest ice-cream stand. Zach noticed that she was standing oddly close to him, brushing against him more than once or twice, giving him these endearing smiles that seemed endlessly familiar but he was sure he had never seen on her face before.
It was only once they had their ice-cream and were sitting on a bench outside of the ice-cream parlor that Zach realized he had been brought there under false pretenses.
She kissed him, her lips soft and sticky from the ice cream, he could taste the vanilla on her breath, and even though this is what he had wanted, he found himself disappointed; part of him had expected firmer lips, the taste of cinnamon, a probing insistent tongue, not this hesitant one that was currently gently prodding his bottom lip. He froze and pulled away, because he suddenly realized that he couldn't do this, not to her. “Megan-” He stopped and stood, and she stood with him, a confused and hurt look on her freckled face. “I, we can't do this-It's not...” He paused, and suddenly he felt lost; he had never done this before. “I don't want to ruin, um, this partnership, and if we keep going... Can't, won't work.” She looked so vulnerable now, so sad, and Zach felt like an ass, but he knew that if he kept going he would have felt worse. “I'm sorry.” He gave her a sorrowful look, and turned to walk away.
“Zach,” He stopped and looked back; she was still standing there, but instead of sad, she looked pissed now, and Zach was glad to see that, because it meant that things would be okay, eventually. “I didn't imagine this.” Her tone was even, but he had seen that cool, collected look before, not on her, but in the eyes of someone else, and he knew what it meant.
He shook his head; he took a step towards her and she stepped back, that look still in her eyes, it hurt, but he deserved it. “What- Of course not, no, its-” He had a hard time articulating
his thoughts, but he had to get it out. “I don't want to... Use you, and I just... Realized that I'm not going into this thinking about you, and it... I don't want to hurt you, and if we do- It'll happen.” He still felt like crap, but the slightly enlightened, but still pissed and hurt, look on Megan's face made him feel a bit, only a little, better. He stepped forward again, and this time Megan held her ground, so he hugged her, and fuck it was awkward, but she hugged him back and he hoped it was a sign that he hadn't irrevocably screwed up whatever it was they had.
Margot started crying, and Megan pulled away.
Zach walked away, with a tentative offer of dinner from Megan, for when she had finally processed what had just happened.
He had to process too. He had to process what had hit him like a speeding freight train only a minute earlier.
It wasn't because she was Megan Wheeler, the freckled, short, red-headed, fiery, beautiful partner of his.
No. Of course fucking not.
It was because she was Megan fucking Wheeler, because she was Danny's protégé, the daughter he'd never had, because from all of her years learning from him she had picked up things, mannerisms, beliefs, even her personality seemed to mirror Danny's. Because the idea of Danny finding out and being pissed off and jealous at the same time turned Zach on.
Fuck.
It was always about Danny.