Paying what's owed ---

[winged_desire]

Himeros.

Q and Anteros.

Mum and Dite --- and that mangy mutt-thing.It was mess. A fucking mess. A downward spiral with nowhere else to go but down, down, down. Trite sayings of "There's nowhere else to go but up" given with bright smiles and in a singsong voice. They made him retch at the ridiculousness of it. They were entirely false. There was

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[ant_eros]

Anteros was affected with some lingering vague malaise that as familiar as it seemed was also as foreign, uncanny and implacable. As much of a shame the distressing feeling was, and the heaviness it placed on his chest, fortunately it was a break from the overwhelming mixed malady of depression and guilt that had earlier sequestered him from his logic and as absurd as it may seem, his passion.

Soon after a short span of apathy followed after he’d spilled his guts and laid his heart out in Ate’s hand. She had left him alone in his bed to rest, his apathy managing to prove how beneficial it was in aiding sleep’s pursuit of him.

Buried under a heap of blankets, the unrequited love god rested with his companion animal lethargically curled at the foot of his bed and his stereo playing retro 80's hits. Human League's "Don't you want me," was currently the only sound besides the faint coo of breath softly polluting the dimmed room.

[winged_desire]

Pothos appeared in Unrequited's home, in the middle of his living room, all quiet and still. The wards let him through without hindrance and he was glad for that. There had been this chance that they would expel him --- and he had not been looking forward to starting a screaming match in the middle of the street.

How Zeus and Hera?

Now,Anteros would just have to face the consequences of his (intended, unintended) slip. The consequences of many things. But creatures of Love were used to consequences.

He made his way to Anteros' bedroom, slipping inside without a sound and saw the room's occupant burrowed under a pile of blankets, a puppy (much better looking than Love's new hound) curled at its master's feet.

"Don't You Want Me? Are you not going overboard just a little bit?"

[ant_eros]

[winged_desire]

The dog was annoying. Extremely so. He stared at it (out and out glaring even - stupid creature was ruining the mood) and then the mutt was gone, banished to Anteros' living room where it could not bother them. The door shut with an audible click and Pothos sat himself beside Unrequited's languid, buried-by-blankets form.

"What is the matter, Anteros? Are you feeling unwell?"

Placing a hand on the erote's brow, "You do not seem all too warm."

Fingers travelling down till they caressed the god's cheek and then jaw, "But perhaps I can make you feel better all the same?"

He purposely ignored the question asked of him, Anteros would find out in time. In all due time.

[winged_desire]

He did not why he did it. Why he said any of what he said.

But why was often missing now.

"I did everything I could to take Himeros away from that Underworlder. Everything. I even listened to Strife and goaded Zelos into beating me so that Himeros could nurse me back to health. The course of action was to have Himeros admit he loved me and needed me and wanted me. I realize now that perhaps it was not the best way I could have gone about things." He shrugged, a small, broken movement.

Smiling ruefully, "Cupid does not know how fortunate he is to have you. And you to have him."

He stood up and made as if to walk away, "Did you know that I cut myself off from Himeros? I can no longer feel him. If I did something I should not have, it was because I was not myself. And once again, I apologize."

Looking at some spot on the wall, "The emptiness hurts more than pain. That surprised me."

Anteros could keep his virility. At this point, Pothos needed it not.

[ant_eros]

What on earth was Pothos prattling on about? Anteros didn't make a move from his position. More ranting about Himeros and then information about being played by Strife? He'd given Pothos the key to unlocking the solution to his problems. Zelos could have given Pothos the means to destroying the relationship Pothos' loathed, and yet Pothos had handled Zelos wrongly and earned his wrath instead of his aid.

"Cupid has Psyche..."

Pothos was romanticizing a situation that wasn't at all romantic to him. So long had passed without having his brother in his life.

"How do I have him?"

His voice was almost muffled by the pillow: "Pothos, no offense but at this point I'm just really beyond caring what Himeros does or who he is with. Perhaps you should have been as aggressive with him as you were with Cupid and I back at Mum's temple and you instead of Phelegthon would have him."

"Emptiness is nothing more than being empty; pain is saturating and... feeling."

[winged_desire]

Apparently, taking away the emo wahwahwah on the radio was not the solution. Anteros was doing the emo thing all by himself. Granted, more of mumbling than warbling but still the same emoness.

Pothos admitted that he had been responsible fora lot of emoness himself (but it is always easier to get annoyed at someone for doing something you hate but do yourself).

He kept from making a face (glaring outright really and it was not like he could be seen anyway) when his attempt to connect with the mopey erote had been rebuffed. He had been trying to say that Anteros was not alone on the sinking boat, that they were birds of the same feather, that out of sight did not make it out of mind, that ---

...

Stopping that train of thought.

Pothos was just trying to say that he knew what Anteros felt (whether the sod admitted it or not). And to have it all thrown back in his face

[ant_eros]

What a catty little biddy Pothos was being!

Still languid and still not turning to give Pothos even so much as a glare, "Mmm. I haven't been known for being happy since the time spent growing up in Cypress Pothos. Not very informed are you?"

"The bond is suppressed; he and I have bonded with others same as Himeros has bonded with another. It's nothing that can't be rekindled if time he makes for me. If an enemy you wouldn't have made of Zelos, I feel---"

He suddenly wondered what happened to his musical selection?

"What has happened to my bloody music?"

Flipping over he rebuked Pothos: "Do you think you can just walk in and take over my home? Turn it back on!"

[winged_desire]

It was all he could do to hold Anteros' gaze. What was the other erote looking for, within the depths of his eyes? Some hope, some relief from the one track madness that seemed to overtake him?

There was no relief. Relief he found in Desire. There was only twisted, painful Yearning that sought to tear your heart out and leave nothing but a gaping wound, leaving you breathless in want and wanting and wanted.

He cocked his head, pretending to considering what Anteros told him. Nodding slowly, he pulled away even more, "Yes, these blankets are not exactly conducive to Passion and passions." Leaning in once again, their gazes locked (Anteros knew exactly who was predator and who was prey), "But I do not think I need to move to achieve that

[ant_eros]

Pothos’ body shifted as he pulled back momentarily from him but then he shifted forward just as suddenly and crushed the hope Anteros had of tricking Pothos’ into willingly moving

[winged_desire]

"Let you go? Let you go and then what? Let you go only to have you never come back to me?"

Breathing harshly and grip tightening on Unrequited's wrists, "I let you go so you would return to me! But do you? Do you?" He shook Anteros roughly and then stopped.

Pothos' eyes blazed and despite Anteros returning to him his virility (accursed, wretched thing and maybe Unrequited was right on all he said before), he felt no Desire. CURSE DESIRE. May Hades take him when his kin already has!

All his Love had withered away into bitterness and hatred and anger and here he was punishing Anteros for it. Bastard. Coward. Fool.

Narrowing his eyes, Pothos pushed away from the recumbent form, thrashing, half-thrashing under him, scowling fiercely. "I do not want you. I do not want anyone. I deny all that I am, Anteros. Take my virility, take the Love you perceive that is still within me! Do your worst, Unrequited!"

He stood and spread his arms wide, bare before the dazed, stunned eyes taking in his naked figure. "Take what you want for there is

[ant_eros]

He felt the hold tighten on his wrists and the words Pothos was saying were frankly scaring him into a panic attack. The walls around him were closing in and he involuntarily trembled under the weight and choked on his sobs fearful to say anything to his subjugator.

And then he was relieved of Pothos’ weight but paralyzed from fear for long enough to hear out Pothos’ tirade.

Catching sight of the dagger in Pothos’ hand he fearfully grabbed a letter opener off of the nightstand, not thinking rationally enough to grab for what he’d previously thought of being hidden away in the drawer.

”Don’t you---“

Through tears: “You’re crackers.”

A trembling hand pointed the object in his hand toward the other Pothos, “Quit it---”