Paying what's owed ---
Himeros.
Q and Anteros.
Mum and Dite --- and that mangy mutt-thing.It was mess. A fucking mess. A downward spiral with nowhere else to go but down, down, down. Trite sayings of "There's nowhere else to go but up" given with bright smiles and in a singsong voice. They made him retch at the ridiculousness of it. They were entirely false. There was ( Read more... )
Q and Anteros.
Mum and Dite --- and that mangy mutt-thing.It was mess. A fucking mess. A downward spiral with nowhere else to go but down, down, down. Trite sayings of "There's nowhere else to go but up" given with bright smiles and in a singsong voice. They made him retch at the ridiculousness of it. They were entirely false. There was ( Read more... )
Pothos admitted that he had been responsible fora lot of emoness himself (but it is always easier to get annoyed at someone for doing something you hate but do yourself).
He kept from making a face (glaring outright really and it was not like he could be seen anyway) when his attempt to connect with the mopey erote had been rebuffed. He had been trying to say that Anteros was not alone on the sinking boat, that they were birds of the same feather, that out of sight did not make it out of mind, that ---
...
Stopping that train of thought.
Pothos was just trying to say that he knew what Anteros felt (whether the sod admitted it or not). And to have it all thrown back in his face.
"You might be used to not having your counterpart in your life, Anteros, but Himeros has always been in mine, whether or not I could actually see him and whether or not he was actually with me." He disdainfully raised an eyebrow. "I can see that the bonds you and Cupid had are long gone. It seems I was mistaken. How...sad."
Reply
Still languid and still not turning to give Pothos even so much as a glare, "Mmm. I haven't been known for being happy since the time spent growing up in Cypress Pothos. Not very informed are you?"
"The bond is suppressed; he and I have bonded with others same as Himeros has bonded with another. It's nothing that can't be rekindled if time he makes for me. If an enemy you wouldn't have made of Zelos, I feel---"
He suddenly wondered what happened to his musical selection?
"What has happened to my bloody music?"
Flipping over he rebuked Pothos: "Do you think you can just walk in and take over my home? Turn it back on!"
Reply
He smirked.
More like easy. But making someone Yearn has always been easy.
"Yes, if time he makes for you." Tilting his head (ignoring the little jibe about Jealousy), "Tell me, how long has it been since he has made time for you?" That little jibe sure to sink its claws in deep and twist, twist, twist.
"Oh. That was music?" He waved a hand impatiently. "It was awful. Quite frankly, I expected more from you but then again, not really. I thought you had good taste --- but one is allowed a trangression or two, I suppose."
Amused that Anteros chose to react to the most inane thing, "Make me."
Reply
He knitted his brow thinking of what Pothos' stated about his taste in music: "Ahh--you know what they say: Variety is the spice of life. Unrequited Love stretches across all musical genres."
"And I suppose one night like that with me would lead you to believe I am readily eager to comply with your wishes, but don't pretend to know the inner workings of my heart and soul."
Lifting up his stereo's remote by the beside he rotated the discs and played Garbage's #1 Crush.
Biting his lip, well aware that Pothos was trying to incite him. Answering as nonchalantly as he can: "I've already covered how long it’s been Pothos. If you would have been paying attention to anything other then the wretched tune of "Woe is me" playing like a broken record inside your head then I suppose my voice would have penetrated your pity filled ears. You would have heard what my true voice was saying and would have realized how wrong you are about me, and how wrong you are about Himeros."
Pausing idly, "Himeros is happy, his love isn't unrequited---Let him be."
Chuckling, "Think you'll ever become accustomed to it?"
Not mentioning what it was.
Reply
Sneering, "Inner workings of your heart and soul? Anteros, it is written all over your face. I wonder if Cupid is as blind as he is stupid. You were begging to be taken by him. Except he never noticed. He was too busy fucking Psyche."
If Anteros wanted mean, he could deliver mean (and he could be mean given the right incentive --- Unrequited just gave it to him).
"Accustomed to pining after someone who does not see me the same way? Much like you pine after Cupid?" He smirked. "No. But after my pity fest and woe is me diatribe, rest assured, I will seek to right all the wrongs left to me. I just need to let a little time pass by. I have waited this long. Several weeks of missing me and Himeros will be just begging to have me back in his life."
Raising an eyebrow at Anteros, "You see, I actually have a backbone and am willing to fight for what is mine. You? You are letting a mere chit replace you. Poor, poor, poor Anteros. Stupid, stupid, stupid Anteros. No wonder you jump from one bed to another --- always afraid to be alone." He leaned in close to whisper intimately (insidiously), "But you are alone now, are you not?"
Reply
Most of what Pothos said was intended to cut and did anger him but Anteros did not believe there was any truth in any of them until the bastard whispered his cruel last statement.
Being alone has always been a deep rooted fear of his and for it to be that transparently obvious to Pothos when the occasions they had spent together had been short? He fought back tears, his grief apparent by the faltering turn of his lips.
Through a sheen of tears: "You. know. nothing! Is it a shame? Does he not? I never begged of him anything! You contradict your earlier confession! Liar! You're never sincere! Your apology meant nothing!"
Some need to explain, to validate it again and again to himself with a gradual change in his demeanor taking him over: "He is my brother! I was created so that he could prosper and he did. He prospered and then it was my destiny that when he no longer needed what I could do for him that I change---"
"We had two different paths. I could not follow where he went."
Callousness was breaking through and replacing his pain: "For you to suggest that I was saving myself for love? Explicitly for Cupid's love?"
He scoffed.
"My first sexual embrace---Her love shaped me---"
"I may have been created for and Cupid may have helped me grow as much as I helped him, but it was Fate that twisted me into what I became and with the passing of time I---this new creation---sits here before you now."
Wiping his eyes: "You have not waited long enough, you have not missed long enough, and Himeros will never beg to have you return for I will fight for what is mine."
He sinisterly grinned at Pothos: "Oh---Mine has always been the unrequited. The scorned and the scorner and you? You are mine and it seems have not suffered me long enough."
Patting Pothos' cheek with pert: "As long as you suffer, I'm not alone."
"You've lost your virility to me, Himeros to Phelegethon and any chance of Himeros ever returning your love in the same way you love him...to me."
He laughed playfully: "I'll not be alone. And it didn't take jumping in another bed."
Glancing at his surroundings: "Ironic that I was already in one."
Reply
Anteros was close to crying?
He was momentarily aghast. He had never meant to make Anteros cry. To take back those words! How to make it better (without taking anything back as this would be seen as weak and he was not weak). Perhaps ---
Momentarily aghast.
A moment that came and gone.
Lips curling back into a fearsome scowl, "Liar? Me? Anteros, the only one who lies is you. you never begged him of anything?" He scoffed. "It is written in every part of you, from the top of your head to the soles of your feet. I was wrong. It was not Cupid that was blind. It was you. I remember as cherubs you would follow Eros around incessantly, like a shadow he never noticed. You say you were created so that he could prosper? Well, you must be utterly happy then. Because he has prospered and he is happy and do you know whose arms he lies in now?"
A pause. "Psyche. Psyche, Psyche, Psyche. And to think, when we were mere cherubs, it was you he held in his arms and you who held him. 'Tis a shame. Never mind. I can see you and Psyche becoming oh so close as you discuss your mutual affection and care for Cupid --- who only returns them to one of you."
He narrowed his eyes and his piercing eyes (slate and did not that fit well?) swept over Unrequited's form, "Fate's new creation? Perhaps I should have a word with her then. Her creation seems a bit flawed." Nodding slowly, "Yes, yes. I see now. So she has fashioned you. But what did you give her in turn? Perhaps I should save her the pain of speaking about you. You have brought her enough pain, have you not?" Another cruel jibe sinking in deep and twisting. Pothos was hurtful with the best (worst) of them.
A cold smile was on his face after Anteros' attempt to get a rise from him (pun intended, of course). "I am yours? Very well. Then, you are mine. For you will never stop Yearning --- it is a Yearning that will eat away at you till there is nothing left. But that is all right. You are used to it." He reached out to caress Anteros' cheek, thumb rubbing circles on the smooth cheek. "We make a lovely pair."
He ignored all talk of Himeros. Himeros was another battleground to be fought with another player.
Reply
He threaded his fingers through each other and rested his locked hands against his lap in hopes that he could physically contain himself while he tried to keep as calm as a composure as he could in the face of provocation: "And you know what else? I'm happy for him. Despite what you think is scribbled all over me or for your own obsessed psychotics I do not wish to possess that which is not mine. Only do I covet my brother's love and attention as I always have. That is all. I do not wish to devour him as you would wish to consume Himeros. The sex was interesting...I'll admit, and give you credit for that, but I'd never expect him to be my one and only you perverted twit!"
Pompously noted: "Thankfully I'm not as delusional as you!"
Wagging his would be locked index fingers: "In the past he and I needed each other, this much is true. And when Psyche's beauty stole his attention from me than I was hurt and recoiled from the rest of you, because I felt abandoned and I didn't understand. But the past has passed us now Pothos so stop lingering on it as if it were the day before yesterday."
"And another thing? I never claimed to not be flawed, so don't speak to me about what I did to Fate. She had her part in my design, and surely she knew as much would come. She hurt me first and she hurts no more for my behalf as insufferable as I know that must be for you, knowing how you love to throw what you can in my face."
Reply
Bite me.
No, really. Bite me.
Smiling sweetly, he reached out and patted Unrequited's head as one would a child --- or a really stupid puppy. He even talked to Anteros as one - child or stupid puppy, it was the same. "There, there. I know we are in an argument and it is quite frustrating to have every failure thrown in your face this is not EVERY failure yet, you sod, but does calling names really help? One would think we were more mature than that."
"We all dwell in delusions. Is that not one of those quaint little authors Apollo is fond of inspiring said? You may think of me as delusional, Anteros, but I see far more than you ever will."
Perhaps I mean to ignore it then. Did you never stop to think of that?
Pothos could hear the hurt in Anteros' voice, as much as the anger and frustration that tended to overshadow it. And perhaps if they were not too deep into this argument, too vested in hurting the other more, too keen on ignoring own hurts --- maybe he would have stopped pushing and pulling and pushing. Maybe he would have done the right thing and sought to make things better.
But those were all perhaps and maybes. And the certainty was that Pothos was bastard - a title he took much pride in as it was all he had left - and this was his game.
"For that I pity you. You hide so well from yourself. So, so well."
Reply
Reaching for Pothos' hand roughly and slinging it back toward him: "Cut the bullshit you wanker."
"You can take your pity and sod off. Now unless there is anything else you wish to say that isn't condescending? Get the fuck out!"
Reply
Eyes almost flashing-shining in the dimness of the room, "Get out? I do not think so either."
With that he surged forward, not even a full heartbeat had passed, and he was atop Anteros' form, holding Unrequited's hands pinned above his head and pressing the other erote firm against the bed. The kiss was forceful and demanding, harsh and fierce.
The kiss spoke of anger and self-loathing, bitterness and surging Desire sweeping and cresting over him and it spilled over onto Anteros' lips in a tide of frantic Passion and frenzied Yearning, these monstrous waves that slammed into Anteros with no gentleness or subtlety whatsoever.
Reply
Not having much time to react before the larger form was over him crushing him into the soft mattress, pinning his hands above the bed. Fucker!
He squirmed against the forcefulness, flailing his legs under the weight of his attacker which was made more difficult by the mass of comforters he'd been under.
He tasted the robust saline taste of blood from his own lips and turning his head from side to the side attempted to jerk away from the violating lips. The taste of him inciting Anteros to fight even more against it despite the confliction of the crazed desire in those poisonous lips there his hatred was still strong and winning out.
Muffled: "Get off--"
Reply
Futile. Useless. Ridiculous flailing.
Smirking when he heard Unrequited, "Get off? How kind of you."
Shoving and flooding Anteros wth more of him as he was Yearning and Passion, grinding their bodies together despite being hampered by the covers and sheets between them.
FUCK.
So.
GOOD.
And he could tell Anteros was not completely abhorrent of their activities now.
Reply
"Stop this at once!"
"Pothos---"
"Breathy: "You will get no satisfaction."
Crying out because the answer to his own question was apparent to himself: "How do you expect to get satisfaction?"
He knew he wanted power over him, and still he fought as fiercely as he could against it despite the inclinations of his easily aroused body. His head wasn't in this and he couldn't believe Pothos would dare to exalt himself over him forcefully after moments earlier apologizing for his behavior.
Lips again pursuing the side of his mouth he pursed his lips taut together in an attempt to threat them the venom that already breeched them breaking down his inhibitions and his sanity.
His wrists twisted against the fleshly restraints, fingers bending and to no avail digging at the hands that held them.
Struggling with all that he could muster, and crying out a pleading demand: "Stop it you fuck!"
Reply
"Stop it? Stop what? This?"
He kissed Anteros harshly --- more of Yearning and Passion slipping through despite the clsoed seam of the other's lips.
"Stop this?"
He stroked Unrequited through the covers --- deft touch bringing on the reaction he wanted.
"Stop this, Anteros?"
He pulled away and their gazes met in a clash of azure and slate, brimming over with every hateful feeling there was possible. "Why do you want me to stop it when you want it so?" Leaning over to whisper the curve of Unrequited's ear, "Stop fighting so fiercely. Give in."
Reply
A silent moment between them, just looking at each other through the eyes of reversible predator and prey.
Incredulous through a furrowed brow came these questions asked of him and then he abruptly kissed and broke wearing under the intoxicant of yearning.
Bewildered eyes meeting Pothos' burning eyes again once they returned from where they had been.
Want it? He didn't want this. For everything that his mind and his heart told him---he didn't want this but from what reaction Pothos' was now coaxing from his body and the saturation of Yearning's spell soaking into mind.
And then warmth splashed his ear in the form of a seducing breath. His breathes were slowing but he felt himself becoming overcome with yearning for touches, for more kisses, and for sex. It was agonizing and if he didn't manage to break away soon he knew Pothos would have him where he wanted him.
Closing his eyes and then opening them: "Move. Get undressed. What can you do with all these blankets between us, aye?"
This was his one chance. If Pothos released him he might be able to escape him.
Reply
Leave a comment