She cuts her wrists to watch them bleed ( Read more... )

It's times like this I feel like he doesn't know me at all. It's times like this I understand how advice-giving can be a way to actively hassle someone like it says in our communication guide. It's times like this I hate to have been vulnerable with anyone because then they can make me feel even worse.

I will never understand how people continue to hurt each other. The saddest part about it is that we hurt the people we love the most ( Read more... )

I just... I just don't know. I'm not capable of this. I can't manage it and I can't talk about it. I can't say the words because I don't know how. And it makes me worse not to be able to say them. Pretending its nothing makes me feel like I'm drowning. Maybe I am. It wouldn't shock me. Not anymore.

Sometimes I wish I could turn my mind off with a switch.

They say all geniuses are a little crazy. Well, I'm probably a little less genius and a little less crazy than the others in my family, but sometimes I wonder.

*yawn*

The pain in my knuckles remains miserable and mostly unbearable. It's hard to type, use a mouse, put my hair in a pony tail, squeeze any kind of bottle (particularly shampoo/conditioner), tie shoes, write, and put my car from park to drive or vice versa ( Read more... )

Updates... hmm ( Read more... )

I'm socially isolating myself from anyone who knows about what happened with mom. It's because I don't want to have to explain the situation and I don't want to have to hear "I'm so sorry" one more time. Even my friends, I don't want them to think about it when they're around me. I don't know. Bleh ( Read more... )

In answer to my question in the last post, easily.

It's the worst at night. With the setting sun goes my sanity. And once again, I'm broken. ~Me

"This is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a whimper." ~T.S. Eliot - The Hollow Men

If I've been avoiding you in any way, I apologize. I just haven't felt like talking or thinking. Will explain another time.

How do you lose something you never had?