thoughts
you know I got on here to write about pain and sorrow and blah blah blah...
but then I realized something... I DONT HAVE ANY OF THAT. its over, Im over it...
so why is that I like... trick myself into thinking about shit again... almost wanting the drama back..because i seriously dont have any in my life right now...shouldnt I be happy? I mean..I AM HAPPY.. but shouldnt I be content with the NO DRAMA. I mean thats what I DIDNT want..so why do I go looking for it? oh wow now I've gone and confused myself. lol
I've been thinking alot about the Art Institute and Im not completely sure I want to go anymore... I dont know.. I probably should go if I am accepted..its a new start, with everything, new place, new people... the only thing Im not COMPLETELY thrilled about is the fact that I would be...alone..I mean until I can make some friends down there. but still I wont have my family to go visit or my friends.. Im leaving so many great friends.. and I feel that if I go away I might lose most if not all of them. I really hope I dont.. that would be good. if I can keep in contact and have them visit and have me visit...
At times, now, I feel lonely....what is that feeling gonna be like with everyone I love miles away... I guess maybe Im just getting cold feet... AND I HAVENT EVEN BEEN ACCEPTED! lol
oh well
Im going to bed