Under the Impression [[4/5]]
Title: Under The Impression
Author:
dee_jaydj
Rating: Light R for slightly intense boykissing. >.>
Pairing: Zack/Alex, with mentions of Jack/Alex
POV: Third (Zack-centric)
Summary: As a forever toiled-over Alex reveals something private with Zack, his whole world is flipped over and he has to fight to make sense of what he used to believe was true.
Disclaimer: I do not own All Time Low, else Zack wouldn't be put through so much stress all the time ._.
Beta: alifeofourown
Author Notes: I'm super proud of myself, I actually did this within a week of the last chapter! It's mostly thanks to my awesome-tastic beta. <3333 Awesome chick, super happy to have her helping out. One more chapter after this! Ahhh! (btw, boisecks in the next chapterrr~)
But honestly, I'm not very happy with this chapter. I think it's kiiiiinda lame. >.< The next one will be a little long, though. Be prepared.
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
“Lex… Alex, I think we need to talk. Lex, I know you’re really upset with me right now, and you probably don’t even want to talk to me, but… Alex, I love you, and I can’t have some false hope, because I’ll never stop loving you. I’ll… I’ll just go now.”
The utter lack of protest that met Zack was nothing short of a disappointment. The bassist lingered for a moment longer, before slowly pushing himself away from the stall and heading for the door. That was it. He just single-handedly ruined the band, everything they’d worked so hard to achieve-destroyed by his own ridiculously stupid admission of his feelings. He’d suffered this long. Why did he have to go and ruin it now?
Maybe the band was better off without him and-
Before he really knew it was happening, Alex had spun him around to look at him, his face torn between fury and relief. A silent moment passed between them, before Alex drew his arm back and swung, colliding with Zack’s jaw. It didn’t hurt as much as Alex probably wanted it to, but a punch was a punch. Zack stumbled back a little, looking at Alex with wide eyes. His lips moved to form the words ‘what was that for?’ but never got the chance as Alex’s crashed over his own. The kiss was full of need and desperation, and Zack could taste the tears on Alex’s lips. Taste his pain; their pain.
And that’s when it hit him. He’d been so concerned with his own pity-party, he never stopped to think that maybe Alex really did feel the same way. Selfish. But the taste of that kiss… Zack knew better now.
Without any more thought than that, the blonde’s arms wrapped tightly around Alex, holding him in place and kissing back fervently. After a minute, Alex was the first to pull away, looking at Zack through red-rimmed eyes. It was quiet between them for a bit before Alex shook his head a little.
“I. Have waited. So long. For you to say that to me. Zachary Merrick. You fucking suck, and I love you too.”
Zack’s hopes had slowly started declining again, starting to worry that the insults were going nowhere good, but there it was. That ‘I love you too’ that mended every broken piece of his heart. It still wasn’t totally better; no. He doubted it ever would be, but this was good.
Alex loved him back.
Nothing in the world could’ve made Zack happier.
“You… do?” Zack choked out, praying he wasn’t dreaming.
“Of course I fucking do! Do you think I’d be this fucking upset if I didn’t?” Alex said, voice low with the fight against the waver his tears created in his voice. Zack was quiet for one long, painfully thick moment before all he could do was smile. It was weak, unsure. He forgot how to feel truly happy, but this just maybe helped.
He wanted to ask, well, what about Jack? Then he figured, ‘Hey, it’s my turn to be the bad friend. Fuck it.’
Throwing out the last of the reserve he maintained, Zack tightened his arm around Alex’s waist, pulling him close as the bassist eagerly reconnected their lips. Instead of being gentle and cautious as he had before, Zack just let go. Alex’s lips moved against his own almost perfectly, desperate and all about being, being together. It was more than right.
But how, Zack wondered, did he manage to move them against one of the sinks?
He only knew this because when leaning forward a bit, he felt Alex’s lower back meet resistance, one hand bracing himself against the cool porcelain. Alex made a little moaning noise at the lack of movement, his arms somehow finding their way to Zack’s neck. Every now and then there would be a minute breach in the kiss, a few desperate gasps for breath before some magnetic pull brought them together once more. There was a fairly decent chance that someone had come into the bathroom at some point, but whoever it was didn’t stay for long.
Maybe it was because the noises Alex was making were downright dirty. Zack didn’t know how that boy still had clothes on.
After a length of time neither of them bothered to keep track of, the kisses, hard and heavy, slowed to simple presses of lips. The fervor that coursed through Zack’s body slowed and inexplicably vanished. His head rate still persisted, speedy and erratic, as Alex broke away from the bassist’s lips before resting his head against the crook of his neck. His slow, shaky breaths washed across Zack’s skin, causing him to shiver slightly. It was hard to concentrate.
They just stood there for a bit, holding onto each other lightly just to have contact.
“We have to tell him,” Alex finally sighed, sounding a little scared. It wouldn’t be much of a surprise. Alex was never one for confrontation.
“You’re right,” Zack agreed, sounding a good deal more confident. Confident, yes, but he didn’t quite believe in himself. How worried Jack sounded when talking about Alex leaving him…what was Zack taking away from him?
But Alex was right. They had to tell him.
There wasn’t much else by way of talking between them after that. Zack pulled away a little, giving Alex room to get away from the sink. Almost immediately, Alex’s hand was in Zack’s and they were walking towards the bathroom door.
A brief moment of ‘should we really do this?’ came and went, leaving as Zack pushed open the door cautiously. The air was seemed considerably less stuffy out of the bathroom, thankfully. Maybe it would help cool-off the two. Zack could see the bright flush on Alex’s face, even out of the corner of his eye.
It wasn’t incredibly hard to find Jack once they got away from the bathroom. He was sitting at a table with some girl, talking excitedly with her.
Alex cleared his throat a little, blushing deeper.
“Jack… Uh… Me and Zack… We’re…we’re getting together ‘cause…uh…I kinda love him…”