Every woman in the world or Me
Diary Entry , 21st Century , Present Day
" I am not meant to be alone. I am destined to be with you. One of the most beautiful and particularly lovely design feature of being human ... we fall in love. When I loved, I grew, I flourished, I fell, and I learnt. Relationships can bring out our best or bring out our worst. And sometimes they’ll do both before breakfast. I know you are my best yet, best ever, because you inspire me to explore the way I am with people and the world, in a way that’s safe enough to own, experiment with and change if I want to.
Being with you feels a bit like magic and a lot like home.
I have had my share of relationships before you came along. Nothing lasted and now I know why. I actually met you a good three years after I knew you. What is this if not destiny ? After those first few meetings and talks it seemed like we had travelled across the oceans of time and depths of heavenly dimensions to be together again. It took us 2 weeks to forge a bond which was beyond understanding and any good sense. The feeling of safety and trust built up in far greater proportion than the time we reached out to each other. A sudden feeling of familiarity of knowing each other at such depths far beyond what the conscious mind could know. Our heads interfered, but our hearts knew. The hearts remembered holding each other in the moon filled river side of Macedonia and the ancient plains of Mongolia. We might have lost each other to the armies of forgotten warrior-generals and might have lived together in the sand covered caves of the Ancient Ones.
After I met you I have felt bonded , a bond strengthened through eternity and ever since I have never felt alone.
I do not understand the circumstances surrounding our meeting. Life as I know it today does not make sense. The head keeps interfering while the heart remains unwavered. I do not know what future brings us. I know as of today it is nearly impossible that we be together as we should be. And it scares me ... will I have to part with you in this life time to search and find you yet again in another. I know my soul mate and I do not know what to do. "
19th Century, A day in a year
Maria was in her 70's now. An elderly woman. Her weathered skin told of a story on the streets, living in shelters, and foraging for what she could. Her grey hair had been falling out, but there was a pattern to it. She wore a cap or hat most of the time. What was left of her hair was matted and knotted.
Her body was frail, a small hump in her upper back, just below the neck. Arthritis more than likely, her hands also showed signs of it, the fingers becoming curled and painful looking.
Her clothing was layers upon layers of shirts and sweaters. It had been long since she touched her skin under those layers. Too Long.
She looked down at her feet and picked up the small bag that contained her belongings. Most of the contents made little sense. Rocks, thread and yarn. Twisty ties. A cough drop wrapper.
Between all the nonsensical things, however, was a locket.And at the deeper end a note book. Maria picked up the locket carefully. She looked over the frail chain, opening the locket. Inside was a single picture. It was old, cracked and faded.
The picture was of a ballerina. The woman seemed almost unrecognisable. A stranger , perhaps a woman from another life. But Marie knew better.
She was a beautiful young dancer with the Russian Ballet. Dark hair and light blue eyes, skin so white like cream. She was a crown jewel. Loved by all. Her fluid grace enchanted theater goers. She headlined several ballets.
She remembered how matters soon became bad in ways of politics.The performing arts kept the young ballerina quite busy, for a while until things went out of control. She fled the country with her manager. There was no chemistry , no love atleast on her part. He pressed to deepen the relationship, to have sex, to make commitments.
She gave in - she wasn’t the crown jewel anymore. The competition for headlining performances was too strong.
She was failing. No longer the Princess Ballerina.
He drank too much. He became violent. He was selfish and she cursed the marriage. But she lived with him. She had no one else. He beat her once in a while and then regularly. She winced , tears streaming down her lined cheeks.
He died in a fight, stabbed in the chest with a long knife was what she was told. It must have pierced his heart. She had been told there was blood everywhere.
She then met John. She fished the tattered diary out of her bag. The story of her life as she wanted to remember it. The only memories she wanted to keep. She opened to the page , the day John had died at war. Love story for 4 years, that would last her for the rest of her life.
" I love him so much. I've never met any man I could love like that. And he loved me back the same way. And without that love how can my life ever be complete ? How can I ever be happy. "
She closed the book with a sigh and opened the locket. She removed the picture and underneath was his picture ... hidden from all and safe just for her. She closed her eyes , put the chain around her neck. It was time ....
13th Century, Long Long Ago ....
The era of the Sung Dynasty Rule is widely considered to be a high point of classical chinese civilization. The Sung economy, facilitated by technology advancement, had reached a level of sophistication probably unseen in world history before its time. The population had soared to over 100 million and the living standards of common people improved tremendously due to improvements in rice cultivation and the wide availability of coal for production. The capital cities encouraged vibrant civil societies unmatched by previous Chinese dynasties. As land trading routes to far west were blocked by nomadic empires, there were extensive maritime trade with neighbouring states, which facilitated the use of Sung coinage as the de facto currency of exchange. Giant wooden vessels equipped with compasses travelled throughout the China Seas and northern Indian Ocean. The concept of insurance was practised by merchants to hedge the risks of such long-haul maritime shipments. With prosperous economic activities, the historically first use of paper currency emerged in the western city of Chengdu, as a supplement to the existing copper coins.
The advances in civilization during the Sung dynasty came to an abrupt end following the devastating Mongol conquest, during which the population sharply dwindled, with a marked contraction in economy. Despite viciously halting Mongol advance for more than three decades, the Southern Sung capital Hangzhou fell in 1276.
A year that marked a great transition for Empress Ai, concubine of Emperor Xian chosen to be wed at age 13 by her parents, and mother of successor Emperor Tong. With the annihilation of the empire the young widow and her baby was forced to surrender to the barbaric mongols. She was kept in prison and used as the leaders pleased. Her baby was snatched away and she never knew what became of him.
She had shut out that dark phase of her life after being rescued by a Samaritan nomad NaranBaatar. He had taken her to his home among a group of nomadic people who hunted and raised cattle. His parents were leaders and he was a string and skilled horseman and hunter. She stayed as a daughter to his parents and life turned around once again. She slowly learnt to put her torments behind her and at the same time accepted the new way of life. Everyone was more than pleased when NaranBaatar professed love to her. He had taken his time and given her time to heal as well. She was silently grateful. Time blessed them with a beautiful daughter. Life had come full circle.
The quests for new land brought some ruin to the clan. Families were separated and chaos, destruction and ruin prevailed. Her ethnicity made her a prime candidate for captures , taken away for the rest of a life time , never to be held in the strong arms of her Mongol husband. All he had was a letter she wrote to him on books introduced by the traders instead of the scrolls. He kept it safe as the sole reminder of the love they shared.
She had written " I do not think a day can pass by without being able to see your smile. Without telling you things and hearing your voice back. Even though I am unsure of most things in my life, I am certain that I love you and will love you till forever. "
330 BC .... A very very long time ago
Lady Helena loved her play time with her maidens by the river Jhelum. It was fate that brought Rana Udayapratap to those parts. He was mesmerised by the Greek Beauty and fell in love with her instantly. He sent her messages through pigeon carriers. Though she had not seen him , she had formed his image in her mind through his letters. It was his thoughts , views and outlook that eventually won her heart and she started developing feelings for him even though she had not seen the mighty emperor. The emperor expressed his desire to take the Greek Princess as his second bride. His minister advised him to wage a war against the macedonian empire and thus put pressure on the King. As expected the famed Indian warrior won the war he declared and when he asked for the princess hand in marriage the King refused and offered parts of his kingdom captured in war. After all Udayapratap was a heathen , a person who neither followed the greek religion nor acknowledged the same. Helena however was so besotted in love that she managed to convince her father to the union.
The Greek empress loved India and the marriage made her happy. She learnt classical Indian Music and started taking classes to learn the Sanskrit language. However their story was not the forever kinds - 4-5 years after their marriage when she was 8 months pregnant the King converted to Jainism , took sanyas ( hibernation ) from active politics and died in the forests soon after.
Historical Scrolls have recorded Lady Helena as saying " I loved him with sincerity. We do not give people we do not love the power to destroy us. He had wrapped his warm hands around my cold waist and assured me that I would be safe in his arms, that he loved me too much to let me fall. One day he let go and I was left there wondering where the warmth had gone. "
Back to the present day ....
I knew John, I knew NaranBaatar, I knew UdayaPratap. And I knew YOU. I also knew where I was from. My soul was riddled with Toska.
There are no coincidences in love and it is possible to love and lose across lifetimes. Love stories such as these happen every now and then ... silently ... stories of hope and destiny. This is one such story.
( This is my entry for Week 6 where the prompt given to us was " Where I am from " I have explored the possibility of reincarnation and soul recognition. As always concrits and recommendations are appreciated )
" I am not meant to be alone. I am destined to be with you. One of the most beautiful and particularly lovely design feature of being human ... we fall in love. When I loved, I grew, I flourished, I fell, and I learnt. Relationships can bring out our best or bring out our worst. And sometimes they’ll do both before breakfast. I know you are my best yet, best ever, because you inspire me to explore the way I am with people and the world, in a way that’s safe enough to own, experiment with and change if I want to.
Being with you feels a bit like magic and a lot like home.
I have had my share of relationships before you came along. Nothing lasted and now I know why. I actually met you a good three years after I knew you. What is this if not destiny ? After those first few meetings and talks it seemed like we had travelled across the oceans of time and depths of heavenly dimensions to be together again. It took us 2 weeks to forge a bond which was beyond understanding and any good sense. The feeling of safety and trust built up in far greater proportion than the time we reached out to each other. A sudden feeling of familiarity of knowing each other at such depths far beyond what the conscious mind could know. Our heads interfered, but our hearts knew. The hearts remembered holding each other in the moon filled river side of Macedonia and the ancient plains of Mongolia. We might have lost each other to the armies of forgotten warrior-generals and might have lived together in the sand covered caves of the Ancient Ones.
After I met you I have felt bonded , a bond strengthened through eternity and ever since I have never felt alone.
I do not understand the circumstances surrounding our meeting. Life as I know it today does not make sense. The head keeps interfering while the heart remains unwavered. I do not know what future brings us. I know as of today it is nearly impossible that we be together as we should be. And it scares me ... will I have to part with you in this life time to search and find you yet again in another. I know my soul mate and I do not know what to do. "
19th Century, A day in a year
Maria was in her 70's now. An elderly woman. Her weathered skin told of a story on the streets, living in shelters, and foraging for what she could. Her grey hair had been falling out, but there was a pattern to it. She wore a cap or hat most of the time. What was left of her hair was matted and knotted.
Her body was frail, a small hump in her upper back, just below the neck. Arthritis more than likely, her hands also showed signs of it, the fingers becoming curled and painful looking.
Her clothing was layers upon layers of shirts and sweaters. It had been long since she touched her skin under those layers. Too Long.
She looked down at her feet and picked up the small bag that contained her belongings. Most of the contents made little sense. Rocks, thread and yarn. Twisty ties. A cough drop wrapper.
Between all the nonsensical things, however, was a locket.And at the deeper end a note book. Maria picked up the locket carefully. She looked over the frail chain, opening the locket. Inside was a single picture. It was old, cracked and faded.
The picture was of a ballerina. The woman seemed almost unrecognisable. A stranger , perhaps a woman from another life. But Marie knew better.
She was a beautiful young dancer with the Russian Ballet. Dark hair and light blue eyes, skin so white like cream. She was a crown jewel. Loved by all. Her fluid grace enchanted theater goers. She headlined several ballets.
She remembered how matters soon became bad in ways of politics.The performing arts kept the young ballerina quite busy, for a while until things went out of control. She fled the country with her manager. There was no chemistry , no love atleast on her part. He pressed to deepen the relationship, to have sex, to make commitments.
She gave in - she wasn’t the crown jewel anymore. The competition for headlining performances was too strong.
She was failing. No longer the Princess Ballerina.
He drank too much. He became violent. He was selfish and she cursed the marriage. But she lived with him. She had no one else. He beat her once in a while and then regularly. She winced , tears streaming down her lined cheeks.
He died in a fight, stabbed in the chest with a long knife was what she was told. It must have pierced his heart. She had been told there was blood everywhere.
She then met John. She fished the tattered diary out of her bag. The story of her life as she wanted to remember it. The only memories she wanted to keep. She opened to the page , the day John had died at war. Love story for 4 years, that would last her for the rest of her life.
" I love him so much. I've never met any man I could love like that. And he loved me back the same way. And without that love how can my life ever be complete ? How can I ever be happy. "
She closed the book with a sigh and opened the locket. She removed the picture and underneath was his picture ... hidden from all and safe just for her. She closed her eyes , put the chain around her neck. It was time ....
13th Century, Long Long Ago ....
The era of the Sung Dynasty Rule is widely considered to be a high point of classical chinese civilization. The Sung economy, facilitated by technology advancement, had reached a level of sophistication probably unseen in world history before its time. The population had soared to over 100 million and the living standards of common people improved tremendously due to improvements in rice cultivation and the wide availability of coal for production. The capital cities encouraged vibrant civil societies unmatched by previous Chinese dynasties. As land trading routes to far west were blocked by nomadic empires, there were extensive maritime trade with neighbouring states, which facilitated the use of Sung coinage as the de facto currency of exchange. Giant wooden vessels equipped with compasses travelled throughout the China Seas and northern Indian Ocean. The concept of insurance was practised by merchants to hedge the risks of such long-haul maritime shipments. With prosperous economic activities, the historically first use of paper currency emerged in the western city of Chengdu, as a supplement to the existing copper coins.
The advances in civilization during the Sung dynasty came to an abrupt end following the devastating Mongol conquest, during which the population sharply dwindled, with a marked contraction in economy. Despite viciously halting Mongol advance for more than three decades, the Southern Sung capital Hangzhou fell in 1276.
A year that marked a great transition for Empress Ai, concubine of Emperor Xian chosen to be wed at age 13 by her parents, and mother of successor Emperor Tong. With the annihilation of the empire the young widow and her baby was forced to surrender to the barbaric mongols. She was kept in prison and used as the leaders pleased. Her baby was snatched away and she never knew what became of him.
She had shut out that dark phase of her life after being rescued by a Samaritan nomad NaranBaatar. He had taken her to his home among a group of nomadic people who hunted and raised cattle. His parents were leaders and he was a string and skilled horseman and hunter. She stayed as a daughter to his parents and life turned around once again. She slowly learnt to put her torments behind her and at the same time accepted the new way of life. Everyone was more than pleased when NaranBaatar professed love to her. He had taken his time and given her time to heal as well. She was silently grateful. Time blessed them with a beautiful daughter. Life had come full circle.
The quests for new land brought some ruin to the clan. Families were separated and chaos, destruction and ruin prevailed. Her ethnicity made her a prime candidate for captures , taken away for the rest of a life time , never to be held in the strong arms of her Mongol husband. All he had was a letter she wrote to him on books introduced by the traders instead of the scrolls. He kept it safe as the sole reminder of the love they shared.
She had written " I do not think a day can pass by without being able to see your smile. Without telling you things and hearing your voice back. Even though I am unsure of most things in my life, I am certain that I love you and will love you till forever. "
330 BC .... A very very long time ago
Lady Helena loved her play time with her maidens by the river Jhelum. It was fate that brought Rana Udayapratap to those parts. He was mesmerised by the Greek Beauty and fell in love with her instantly. He sent her messages through pigeon carriers. Though she had not seen him , she had formed his image in her mind through his letters. It was his thoughts , views and outlook that eventually won her heart and she started developing feelings for him even though she had not seen the mighty emperor. The emperor expressed his desire to take the Greek Princess as his second bride. His minister advised him to wage a war against the macedonian empire and thus put pressure on the King. As expected the famed Indian warrior won the war he declared and when he asked for the princess hand in marriage the King refused and offered parts of his kingdom captured in war. After all Udayapratap was a heathen , a person who neither followed the greek religion nor acknowledged the same. Helena however was so besotted in love that she managed to convince her father to the union.
The Greek empress loved India and the marriage made her happy. She learnt classical Indian Music and started taking classes to learn the Sanskrit language. However their story was not the forever kinds - 4-5 years after their marriage when she was 8 months pregnant the King converted to Jainism , took sanyas ( hibernation ) from active politics and died in the forests soon after.
Historical Scrolls have recorded Lady Helena as saying " I loved him with sincerity. We do not give people we do not love the power to destroy us. He had wrapped his warm hands around my cold waist and assured me that I would be safe in his arms, that he loved me too much to let me fall. One day he let go and I was left there wondering where the warmth had gone. "
Back to the present day ....
I knew John, I knew NaranBaatar, I knew UdayaPratap. And I knew YOU. I also knew where I was from. My soul was riddled with Toska.
There are no coincidences in love and it is possible to love and lose across lifetimes. Love stories such as these happen every now and then ... silently ... stories of hope and destiny. This is one such story.
( This is my entry for Week 6 where the prompt given to us was " Where I am from " I have explored the possibility of reincarnation and soul recognition. As always concrits and recommendations are appreciated )