(no subject)
after i spend time on myspace, it's like, is EVERYONE married now?! sheesh. slow it down a little will ya?
so i'm actually kinda nervous about coming home for christmas. maybe nervous isn't the right word. i just feel like i've changed a lot even in the little time i've been here. and these past few weeks, i have finally accepted it- this is my life now. i know that is a very simple statement, but trust me, when you move overseas, it's impossible to inflict your american life in another country. i don't think the two can exist. so once i let go of that, that my atlanta life simply doesn't work here and it's a much different pace, i finally felt joy for the first time in a long time. but now, that i have to go back, it's a weird feeling. because the people i talk to at home, well, they just don't know what it's like here. i can talk til i'm blue in the face but unless you've been to africa, or to dar, you just don't know. i hope that doesn't make me sound stuck up for saying that. but i'm saying it in all honesty. i'm a different person than i was when i left, or even 6 months ago and i don't know how i'm going to handle going back into a life where everyone is still the same. (not saying people don't change and grow in america...) i guess it's mainly my hometown too, where everyone has just lived the same life for 20 years and noone questions anything about their life. noone challenges themselves. (this is all excluding you, tamara.) so yeah. i'm not dreading going home, but i'm not like, counting down the days or anything. i could stay here for a while and not go home and be fine with that. but alas, christmas is creeping up on us!
so i'm actually kinda nervous about coming home for christmas. maybe nervous isn't the right word. i just feel like i've changed a lot even in the little time i've been here. and these past few weeks, i have finally accepted it- this is my life now. i know that is a very simple statement, but trust me, when you move overseas, it's impossible to inflict your american life in another country. i don't think the two can exist. so once i let go of that, that my atlanta life simply doesn't work here and it's a much different pace, i finally felt joy for the first time in a long time. but now, that i have to go back, it's a weird feeling. because the people i talk to at home, well, they just don't know what it's like here. i can talk til i'm blue in the face but unless you've been to africa, or to dar, you just don't know. i hope that doesn't make me sound stuck up for saying that. but i'm saying it in all honesty. i'm a different person than i was when i left, or even 6 months ago and i don't know how i'm going to handle going back into a life where everyone is still the same. (not saying people don't change and grow in america...) i guess it's mainly my hometown too, where everyone has just lived the same life for 20 years and noone questions anything about their life. noone challenges themselves. (this is all excluding you, tamara.) so yeah. i'm not dreading going home, but i'm not like, counting down the days or anything. i could stay here for a while and not go home and be fine with that. but alas, christmas is creeping up on us!