Life
Life is hard was hard before the Cornavirus and the hoarders and all the death. I still am in the same house with my 15 year old son who has been through so much. Accident on a trampoline that was so bad, when he is 18 he will have to start having surgeries to fix his jaw and put in dental implants. His top two front teeth are gone. He has been in
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You're not old silly girl! :) You ever get a boyfriend? I need one. Been 6 years and even though no one will replace Michael, I still want to find someone. I hate being alone, then again if he dies on me I will kill him! I can't watch a second husband die. haha! I know, not funny. But got to laugh or I cry.
I think you could write books, but yeah harder. They are longer and you have to get a publisher.
My sleep was fine in my 20's and 30's and then I started having trouble. Thought it was medications, but I wasn't on anything but a tranquilizer and I started getting to where I couldn't stay asleep more than 4 or 5 hours every night and usually I would have eventually slept longer after going several nights like that, but I couldn't. I was coming apart, crying. I can't function well without 7 to 8 hours sleep a night. I used to sleep 9 to 10 hours if I didn't have to be up for something. I hear everything now too. Somebody's car alarm went off one morning 6 a.m. and I stay up late so I was mad, was really hard getting back to sleep. I hear thunder and my son can sleep through it. I feel like my brain is on "high" most of the time. I hate this illness. I've been on all kinds of meds, even the new ones I can't take the side effects. Oh well, such is life. She has me on an antipsychotic for sleep and bipolar, and a sleeping pill called Lunesta. I take 2 of them, but they don't work well alone. Not sure why.
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I still have the same one I met at 18. We don't live together, I can't handle being around people all the time, I'd rather be by myself, but I see him every week.
I just have absolutely no interest in writing books.
I used to sleep well, but my doctor got me addicted to tranquilizers and after a while instead of helping me relax and sleep they had the opposite effect. screwed up my mental health completely. I've never been right since. I don't take tranquillisers anymore, they've done me enough harm. Just have to live with the anxiety and panic attacks, OCD, and everything else.
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Oh that is ok about the sheets, was just curious, I figure we have different stores in the States than in the UK.
I remember you telling me about a nice guy who was your boyfriend, forgot his name, my memory is just shot from meds and just life I guess. I am glad he is still around and helps you out. I know some people do better on their own. I get it. I want my time alone, but I hate being always alone. I have Alex, but not the same as a husband, as Michael. I still love and miss him. Over 6 years now and I can't seem to get out and meet anyone and they won't be him. I do feel like he was my soulmate if you believe in that. It is hard to think about marrying someone else, then again, one day Alex will leave and I will be alone and I don't want that, but who is going to want me with all my problems, hard to find someone around my age who is not married and a great guy, cause I never settle. No way! He would have to be a Christian and we would have to feel a connection and just feel "home" with him, comfortable like with Michael. My best friend. Oh and must have a sense of humor, I don't require perfection, but I need someone who can laugh. Michael and I always could make each other laugh and that was the best. :)....oh sorry off I go again.
I like your fanfic. I do want to read it. I haven't felt like doing much. Whatever Alex I got is not good. I have had fever and chills, not bad enough to go to a doctor yet, but I am always aware and if it gets worse or Alex or I can't breathe, I will be calling the doctor. I think it is either a bad head cold or maybe regular flu, but people don't know. People who never had symptoms are testing with the antibodies. I hate this thing!
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When things settle down again maybe you get involved with church activities, that might be the best place for you to meet people and make friends. Who knows, you might meet a nice guy that way, someone you could trust and be comfortable with, but even if you didn't there would be people to talk with and spend time with, maybe you'd feel a little less lonely. *hugs*
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Yeah everyone tells me Church is a good place to meet someone. I never believed that. Never worked for me, but you got to keep going every Sunday. My brother met his wife to be at her Church when he moved to Atlanta to live and work when he was 24 years old. They have been married forever. They are so happy and have 2 sons. My brother is 57 now and she is 55 I think. The second child was born in her late 30's or early 40's. I can't remember now. One is in college the other is a little younger than Alex but they are in the same grade. I guess Robbie is starting 9th grade next year too. Nathan is in college.
I hope I do meet someone when the time is right. Michael had problems too so I figured part of why it worked. Not sure a guy who normal...whatever that is...would want me. Yeah I stay in the house too much. Would be good to get out and meet friends.
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The church is at least a good place to socialise with people who share your values. I sometimes miss going to church but I'm not able to go out much anyway, or sit through a service on hard pews. My hips are bad.
I hope you'll meet someone when you're really ready. No one will ever take Michael's place on your heart, but a new man might someday make his own space there. Tings happen when they happen *hugs* You can't rush or force them.
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Yeah Church might be the place. Sorry you can't go and you have so many health problems. I understand.
No can't rush things, just thought after 6 years surely I would meet someone. I waited 10 years to meet Michael cause like I said, I won't settle for the wrong person just so I am not alone.
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We all take different amounts of time to recover from losing someone to the point where we can move forward. Maybe you'll meet someone new, maybe you won't but it's not something you can plan to happen withing a set amount of time. If it happens it'll probably be when you least expect it to but that shouldn't keep you from meeting people and socialising. When restriction over such things ease up to the point where people CAN actually spend time together, that is.
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