Oh yeah, I finally had time to finish this.
Osakaromanesque, sorry it took so long for me to finish a Hina episode! **Hugs**
From 『ほんでもって』 - すばるクンVS村上クン 『勝負パンツ』 対決!! (Subaru-kun vs. Murakami-kun: "Battle Briefs" Showdown!!)
Subaru: (Humming) ♪Hmm hmm hm~m♪
* Right before the Dream Boys live, Subaru-kun, dressed only in a robe, heads towards the mirror, in a good mood. And then, a sleeply-looking Murakami-kun appears. *
Hina: (Sleepily) Sup.
Subaru: You're late, Hina.
Hina: Well, you see, yesterday, Taichi-kun let me stay over at his place.
Subaru: What is up with that! Going and having fun all by yourself.
Hina: It felt very weird; we only had really serious conversations...
* In any case, Murakami-kun stayed over at Tokio's Kokubun Taichi-kun's house, so today, he came directly from there to the Teikoku Theater. *
Subaru: Did you make sure to change your underwear? Spare me the stink...
* ... Subaru-kun said with a frown. * (← Hey Subaru-kun, Murakami-kun does not stink!)
~ Part 2: Murakami-kun's Battle Brief is very white, snow white!? ~
Hina: Hey, hey, you don't think I would come to the sacred Teikoku Theater with dirty underwear, do you?
* Murakami-kun smirks and calmly answers back at Subaru-kun's tsukomi. *
Hina: Tada!
Subaru: Woh!!
* What Murakami-kun showed off while changing is his very white, boxer-type trunks. *
Hina: Look at these, there isn't a single spot!! This is what you call the whitest out of the whites.
Subaru: (Disturbed) You're into these kinds of things?
* What caught Subaru-kun off-guard was the extreme whiteness of the underwear... No, it was... *
Subaru: To say the least, it doesn't look cool...
* Honestly, it is sort of unattractive. The "ordinary underwear" just doesn't fit Murakami-kun. *
Subaru: This is a joke, right? Did you go buy this somewhere to crack everyone up!?
* Subaru-kun was overcome with shock; it was as if Murakami-kun had completely changed his personality. *
Hina: Idiot! This is what you call a "BATTLE BRIEF!!"
Subaru: BATTLE BRIEF!?
* We've never heard of a "Man's Battle Brief (Underwear)," but if there were to be such a thing, wouldn't it be more "sexy and adult-like?"
Subaru: If so, isn't there another kind? A different one!
* Subaru-kun is thinking the same thing. *
Hina: No! Listen, okay? Since this generation is the way it is, "purely white and conservative briefs" are most fitting as "battle briefs."
Subaru: What do you mean by "since this generation is the way it is?"
Hina: You never know where and when something might happen. You might get into an accident or get caught up in trouble... In times like those, what if the public sees your underwear? There is not doubt that the whiter your underwear is, the more deeply they'll be moved, thinking, "Oh what a honest and pure person this is."
* Murakami-kun puffs out air from his nose and raises his chest up with pride, as if saying, "How is that!" However... *
Subaru: Hina, I think you've got the meaning of "battle" all wrong...
* Kanjani∞'s staff feels the same way. (Uneasy smile) *
Hina: (Snapping) Wrong? Then what kind of underwear is considered a "battle brief?"
Subaru: Now you're mad? You're the one who brought up this "battle briefs" thing in the first place.
* Exactly! Hey Subaru-kun, you should definitely show him off!! *
Subaru: Look, this is what you call... "BATTLE BRIEFS!"
Hina: Woh!!
* Subaru-kun opened up the front of his robe vigorously! (Kakkoii!!) *
~ Part 3: In Kanjani∞, who is the winner of the "Battle Briefs Tournament!" ~
Hina: I give up.
* Murakami-kun sits down in defeat as Subaru-kun looks down on him with triumph. *
Hina: (Sort of shocked) That shocking red with gold glimmer, which pierces the eyes, in Kanjani∞, no in Johnny's, only Subaru can wear it...
Subaru: Hee hee... Instead of "number one," I'm "only one!" thank you very much! I'm Shibutani Subaru, the winner of the Battle Briefs Tournament!!
* What kind tournament is this. (Laughs) *
Subaru: (Bragging) These are very expensive! It's made in Italy and it costs ¥15,000 (≈ $150).
Hina: ¥15,000!?
Subaru: At Donki (Discount store) I bought it for ¥3,980.
Hina: Oh, so its not really made in Italy, it's fake.
Subaru: It is not fake! Anyway, the most important thing about a "battle brief" is that it is supposed to give an impact.
Hina: I guess it is inevitable! I actually just took one of Taichi-kun's underwear, without asking.
* Hey, hey! You took your senior's underwear without asking. (It was brand-new, right!?)
Subaru: See, mine is like, the more you look at it, it's as if you're being pulled into an illusion! In addition, since mine is made in Italy, it gives off a "rich" vibe.
Hina: (Thoughtful) Even when it comes to "battle briefs," there is much to consider.
Subaru: Leave it to me! Starting from now, I will raise you to become a fine "battle brief-nist!"
* What kind of "-nist" is that? (Laughs) *
* Then suddenly... *
Tacchon: Oh crap!
* A frantic Ohkura-kun comes plunging in. *
Subaru: (Yelling) Hey Ohkura! You're extremely late!!
Tacchon: I'm very sorry! I'll change (clothes) right away.
* However, the next second, no one expected Subaru-kun's eyes to turn into two tiny dots! *
Subaru: (In shock) ... Yikes!!
* As Ohkura-kun took off his pants, what appeared "there," was something that you'd think Yinling of Joytoy would wear, a "very sexy T-back♥" underwear!
Subaru: (Distraught) I've been defeated...
* Subaru-kun falls onto the floor, heartbroken. His reign as "king" lasted only 3 minutes. *
- スタッフ関ジャニ∞
[Translated by Debbie-chan @ LJ]
I hope you liked that one. (.^-^.) That episode cracks me up. HA HA HA