Attack of the Poorly Inspired B Movie

[deaths_heritor]

[action, for 308 Miller Street]
[Sometime shortly past noon on Sunday, there is a black-cloaked woman walking through the door.  As in, literally through it.  She's unruffled, though her voice carries a tone of urgency.]

Grandfather?  Grandfather, we need to talk.

[Also she is carrying an extremely sharp sword dripping blood and other messy body

Comments

[likescats]

[Turns a corner. Oh well this is odd.]

YES?

[deaths_heritor]

Oh, there you are.

Do you remember that time when you took a vacation and the souls built up until the toast started buttering itself and the corpses refused to stop walking?

[likescats]

QUITE WELL.

[deaths_heritor]

Right.

It's a bit like that, except with actual undead. More corpses and less toast. Also, these ones seem to be quite fond of mathematics.

[likescats]

DO THEY.

[A simple answer but that's quite troubling. He glances outside.]

HOW MANY OF THEM?

[deaths_heritor]

That's the trouble. You see, they keep performing exponential multiplication.

[likescats]

THAT IS TROUBLESOME.

[And he's suddenly holding his scythe.]

BACK TO WORK THEN.

[deaths_heritor]

I should warn you, it's not our type of zombie. They seem to spread it rather easily.

[likescats]

HOW DO THEY SPREAD IT?

[deaths_heritor]

Bodily fluids, I'd venture. All that biting and bleeding everywhere is really very unsanitary.

[Susan casts a brief glance at her bloody sword.]

...Right, I'll clean this up before I go.

[likescats]

[He nods.]

AND WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

[deaths_heritor]

With you, of course. Unless you wanted to wield the scythe in one hand and the sword in the other?

[likescats]

[Can a grinning skull smile? Just a little.]

I THINK I'LL STICK WITH JUST THE ONE.

[deaths_heritor]

Good. I wouldn't want to be forced to call 'no take-backs'.

[This is the kind of thing you say on occasion when you teach children all day.]

[likescats]

NO TAKE-BACKS?

[deaths_heritor]

...

It's something children say. Don't worry about it, Grandfather.