Cutting hair, cloning humans, customizing house
Who has a neck with about 10 pounds less weight restricting its movements? That's right, this guy. I finally got a haircut today and had them hack off five inches of length, so in other words I no longer have the Passion of the Christ look, which apparently was working for this lady at Wal-Mart who chatted with me for about an hour instead of doing her inventory job.
At first I thought she was someone my brother knew, like someone's mom or somebody he once worked with or even a member of the eye department there since the reason I was just sitting there in Wal-Mart was because I was waiting on Chris to get his eyes examined, but no it was a woman who said she just "liked to be next to handsome men while she worked", which immediately prompted me to look around for said guys. She was not fugly or such, just about 8 years my senior I would guess, and given that I had already shopped for everything I needed and had nothing else to do I sat there talking to her about cloning killing machine armies and printmaking, which incidentally she was the one who brought up.
After about twenty minutes it was apparent that this woman was A: looking for a dad for her kids and B: is somewhat crazy, as in that "energy crystals let me converse with my dead pets" sort of way. I had hoped my extremely nerdish assortment of items for purchase (transformer, Kill Bill and Matrix dvds, gamecube memory card, variable light bulbs, etc.) would put her off a bit but I think they just made her more interested. Eventually Chris comes over to bail me out and declares that he has an ulcer on his eye and that we had to get his prescription taken care, to which the woman responds with various questions until he gives her his patented "damn you are an idiot" look. I politely tell her it was nice meeting her but quickly enough so as to not give her an opportunity to ask to exchange digits, and soon we were on our way with Chris asking me "where the hell did you find crazy thing and what was it exactly?". So yeah, apparently I seem to only attract either crazy women or girls that say hello in bars by rubbing their ass on me when I am trying to watch bands play. Don't get me wrong, I consider the female butt one of God's greatest achievements by far and wide (no pun intended Sir Mixalot), but even if these girls are attractive I am not really about someone I don't know anything about grinding on me without even speaking to me first, or at least exchanging knowing looks or some sort of communication, I guess I am just old fashioned. I also like crazy women too but am rather picky about the brand of crazy, as in I would prefer the "I enjoy taking apart watches and vcrs for no real reason and biting" type instead of the "I have a thousand issues, each with a different howling voice that dictates my behaviour and I am not going to tell you about it or show it until later on, by then my bunny shoes will devour your soul, have you met my pet mitten?" type freaks. Oh well, maybe someday I will meet a cool SANE girl..... without finding out 5 minutes into conversing with them they are engaged, married, or otherwise unavailable.
Dad and I installed the new kitchen sink yesterday and I am still waiting for the entire countertop to collapse under the dinosauric weight. I, of course, got my fingers a little crunched when we put it in place but no major damage resulted amazingly enough. Believe it or not our next project is building the workshop/studio apartment that I needed 2 years ago, whether or not I have anything to with it other than building it is uncertain but at least it is finally getting done.
Still looking forward to Volume 2 Friday, and hopefully some free steak omelets and $20 orange juice. Oh yeah, big happy Birthday "shout outs" to Scottastic, sorry the Nick plans were a bust, and soon Miles who hits the big 20 this year and thereby makes me feel like I should be put in a home, and if I am indeed put in one make sure I get a reserved spot at the "staring window" and a 10 year/lifetime supply of Lays Liquid potato chips. Anyway, happy birthday fellas!
At first I thought she was someone my brother knew, like someone's mom or somebody he once worked with or even a member of the eye department there since the reason I was just sitting there in Wal-Mart was because I was waiting on Chris to get his eyes examined, but no it was a woman who said she just "liked to be next to handsome men while she worked", which immediately prompted me to look around for said guys. She was not fugly or such, just about 8 years my senior I would guess, and given that I had already shopped for everything I needed and had nothing else to do I sat there talking to her about cloning killing machine armies and printmaking, which incidentally she was the one who brought up.
After about twenty minutes it was apparent that this woman was A: looking for a dad for her kids and B: is somewhat crazy, as in that "energy crystals let me converse with my dead pets" sort of way. I had hoped my extremely nerdish assortment of items for purchase (transformer, Kill Bill and Matrix dvds, gamecube memory card, variable light bulbs, etc.) would put her off a bit but I think they just made her more interested. Eventually Chris comes over to bail me out and declares that he has an ulcer on his eye and that we had to get his prescription taken care, to which the woman responds with various questions until he gives her his patented "damn you are an idiot" look. I politely tell her it was nice meeting her but quickly enough so as to not give her an opportunity to ask to exchange digits, and soon we were on our way with Chris asking me "where the hell did you find crazy thing and what was it exactly?". So yeah, apparently I seem to only attract either crazy women or girls that say hello in bars by rubbing their ass on me when I am trying to watch bands play. Don't get me wrong, I consider the female butt one of God's greatest achievements by far and wide (no pun intended Sir Mixalot), but even if these girls are attractive I am not really about someone I don't know anything about grinding on me without even speaking to me first, or at least exchanging knowing looks or some sort of communication, I guess I am just old fashioned. I also like crazy women too but am rather picky about the brand of crazy, as in I would prefer the "I enjoy taking apart watches and vcrs for no real reason and biting" type instead of the "I have a thousand issues, each with a different howling voice that dictates my behaviour and I am not going to tell you about it or show it until later on, by then my bunny shoes will devour your soul, have you met my pet mitten?" type freaks. Oh well, maybe someday I will meet a cool SANE girl..... without finding out 5 minutes into conversing with them they are engaged, married, or otherwise unavailable.
Dad and I installed the new kitchen sink yesterday and I am still waiting for the entire countertop to collapse under the dinosauric weight. I, of course, got my fingers a little crunched when we put it in place but no major damage resulted amazingly enough. Believe it or not our next project is building the workshop/studio apartment that I needed 2 years ago, whether or not I have anything to with it other than building it is uncertain but at least it is finally getting done.
Still looking forward to Volume 2 Friday, and hopefully some free steak omelets and $20 orange juice. Oh yeah, big happy Birthday "shout outs" to Scottastic, sorry the Nick plans were a bust, and soon Miles who hits the big 20 this year and thereby makes me feel like I should be put in a home, and if I am indeed put in one make sure I get a reserved spot at the "staring window" and a 10 year/lifetime supply of Lays Liquid potato chips. Anyway, happy birthday fellas!