(no subject)
gaaaah. this is so frustrating!!!
well kids, im definately not getting the enfield position. cuz they wont even let me apply. uuuurrrr.
yeah so. i get in today at like 930, and i happened to pick up the phone first and made a page, and then cathy calls the booth and shes like, is flo still up there. and im like yeah...so shes like, could you come down here then please? im like...O.O.....she knows. *gasp*. so i get down to the break room and of course, thats what this is about. we basically talked for like 20 minutes about it. and i want to be mad at her so bad, but everything she said was right. like, i havent learned enough yet to take on a full time hc position, cuz they're really looking for someone who's already trained. buuut thats why i asked leslie first if they were willing to train...duh...but anyways. and that dml on my record...uuuhhh......it basically means im STUCK at this big y for at least another year, because no other big y will take me with that. great. i knew i got off the hook way to easily when that first happened. and she said that she and sandie are trying to teach me other things, like attention to detail, which is why they're training me to do the safe. and i mean, she was really nice about it.....like she said that she hopes one day i can get a position like that, and she thinks one day i can do it, she thinks im a great employee, and she doesnt want to see me get eaten alive when they pound me with questions about the front end at the interview, i just need some more experience and i need to improve on little things first. so they're trying to give me more responsibility to help me improve on it. *sigh* i respect cathy, so as much as i dont want to admit it, everything she told me, was right.
HOWEVER. boy am i gunna hear about it when sandie gets back. because kids, i called it. as soon as anthony told cathy about this thinger, she called sandie even tho she was on vacation, cuz i guess the csm is really the person whos suppose to address things like this. so sandie, cathy, and john mountain (??) have a friggin conference about me. what the??? when did me trying to get a better position become everyones business??? so great. sandie, im sure, is gunna wanna talk to me about it when she gets back from vacation. geeh.
this is just all so....frustrating! i want to be mad, i want to throw things, i dont want to admit that they're trying to do whats best for me....but its not working. i just dont understand that if theres all these things that i have to improve on, then what? does that mean luigi is just perfect for the job? am i really that bad that they had to put someone with a month's experience on the front end instead? cathy's all like...i dont want you to be discouraged. well how do you expect me to feel?? you tell me i need all this improvement that you wont even let me apply for the job, you tell me i cant go anywhere until that dml is off my record, that im not going to move up in this company for at least a year...and what? im suppose to be happy about it?? cathy told me that she knows that i went to sandie about the head cashier thing, but that if i ever feel like im stuck moving no where that i can always talk to them about it. well i feel like im stuck moving no where. why else do you friggin think that i would try to apply for a job that even i knew i wouldnt get.
gaaaah! i just want to.....throw something!