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[deadguttergirl]

I scream but no one hears me,i have been so lost and sad lately,and no one knows even if i tell people they dont grasp what im saying.I feel almost dead,i get so numb sometimes its almost bliss,but when i wake up and realize how i feel,i could cry my life away.It hurts so bad to be so alone in the world.I really lost him forever.I could never be

Comments

[kaitesquill]

I'm sorry you are suffering. I realize as a woman you are feeling alone and unworthy. But you are a mother and your death would fuck those little girls up completely and forever. This is tough love time. Fuck that guy. He has been a torment to you for as long as I've known you. I'm going to pray for you. I'm going to pray that you get past him and to a point where you have no feelings for him. He'll be someone you used to know and that's all. More tough love. You had babies so your life is no longer your own. I know you know that. But your priorities must shift away from your heartache and depression. It is a human need to be loved. But it also can lead to dependency and all kinds of other psychological shit that can fuck a person up. You've got an amazing life and you know that. Keep venting when you need to, but you must step out of the sadness and be the woman God means you to be. I love you. T-

[deadguttergirl]

thanks for your comment,you know i dont know you in person,but your a better friend than most i have in person.I love you too!
I will survive,its just sometimes i feel so overwelmed with my own feelings,because now that im a mom i cant barely have them,so i hide them,its so hard not being able to totally care about yourself.Sometimes i feel like i dont matter at all.I just want to know im not alone,and that theres someone who knows me and loves me.I feel as though now that im done with adam,that ill never find another person who will love me.I know i should not worry about it,but im afraid of living a loveless life,i feel love is the point of life.I know i got my girls,and they keep me going,and they cheer me up everyday.
Blah blah,i cant even write my feelings right.I am just overwhelmed right now.