(no subject)
*ring, ring*
"Hello?"
"Lala?
"Yeah, mom?"
"I just wanted to tell you that you're a good kid, and I love you. I don't need anything else."
"Wow, mom."
"I love you, I gotta go."
All is well in this world for a little while.
I love my family. I wish I wasn't always so mad at them for stupid reasons.
Even though my mom is a lunatic psycho bitch sometimes, she takes care of me, she feeds me, she tells me what's what, she does everything in her life for everyone else and I take that for granted sometimes, but it's hard to realize how much we love each other unless she pulls something like this, which usually leaves me with a smile plastered on my face for a few days. And even though my sister is a stubborn jackass most days, she's only trying to help, get me through this decade, she's been here, done this, and she's only trying to make it easier for me. As useless as her advice is sometimes, she tries her best, even if we can't get along for more than five minutes.
For the most part the rest of my family doesn't irk me that much... not to the point of ever thinking they didn't love me for one reason or another.
If I could just make amends with my dad, things would be so good again. I know he's got a lot of shit going on that I can't even begin to fathom, but I know that he still misses me a little, otherwise he wouldn't pick up the phone every time I called and didn't say anything. I want to just go and talk to him but I don't think that would do much good. Maybe I'll get up the guts soon.
My grades are shitty but I have a feeling I'll be okay soon.
I have the best friends in the entire world.
Jayme, Sarah, Ashley, Dana, Shawn, Shelby, Bradley, Brea, Branden, Anthony, Nikki, Colleen.... I do not tell you guys enough how FUCKING rad you are.
And Ben? Baby, you are my silver lining. That sounded like a bad pickup line but when everything goes to shit, you're still there, picking up the peices, helping me through it all, making things alright again. Words still can't say how much I love you, but I think you know just how much. Even with all the shit people say and do, just know that none of it phases me anymore. I don't buy it, I'm over it, you're the one I look to and not them.
I love you so much. (Even though you wear chick pants.) And what you said yesterday? I'm still smiling... I probably won't stop for a while.
Fucking SHIT I love this being happy business.
My mom's got soooo so so so much money coming in at the end of next month. I'm getting a new car, or at least she said I was. She said I could have whatever I wanted so I could upstage my cousins, haha. ..
Wow, I could get used to this.
My voice is being nice to me today so I'm gonna work on my set... I guess I'm playing like six or seven songs next week at some restauraunt? My mom set it up so I have no fucking clue what I'm doing, haha. It should be fun, however. I love playing restauraunts.
GAH I'm all fuckin' smiley. Yay for cinnamon raisin bread.
So last night, as Ben was driving me home, he pulled off to the side of the road and stared at me for five minutes at least. He kissed me one of those "make the whole world happy" kisses.
"When I can, I want to marry you."
"Hello?"
"Lala?
"Yeah, mom?"
"I just wanted to tell you that you're a good kid, and I love you. I don't need anything else."
"Wow, mom."
"I love you, I gotta go."
All is well in this world for a little while.
I love my family. I wish I wasn't always so mad at them for stupid reasons.
Even though my mom is a lunatic psycho bitch sometimes, she takes care of me, she feeds me, she tells me what's what, she does everything in her life for everyone else and I take that for granted sometimes, but it's hard to realize how much we love each other unless she pulls something like this, which usually leaves me with a smile plastered on my face for a few days. And even though my sister is a stubborn jackass most days, she's only trying to help, get me through this decade, she's been here, done this, and she's only trying to make it easier for me. As useless as her advice is sometimes, she tries her best, even if we can't get along for more than five minutes.
For the most part the rest of my family doesn't irk me that much... not to the point of ever thinking they didn't love me for one reason or another.
If I could just make amends with my dad, things would be so good again. I know he's got a lot of shit going on that I can't even begin to fathom, but I know that he still misses me a little, otherwise he wouldn't pick up the phone every time I called and didn't say anything. I want to just go and talk to him but I don't think that would do much good. Maybe I'll get up the guts soon.
My grades are shitty but I have a feeling I'll be okay soon.
I have the best friends in the entire world.
Jayme, Sarah, Ashley, Dana, Shawn, Shelby, Bradley, Brea, Branden, Anthony, Nikki, Colleen.... I do not tell you guys enough how FUCKING rad you are.
And Ben? Baby, you are my silver lining. That sounded like a bad pickup line but when everything goes to shit, you're still there, picking up the peices, helping me through it all, making things alright again. Words still can't say how much I love you, but I think you know just how much. Even with all the shit people say and do, just know that none of it phases me anymore. I don't buy it, I'm over it, you're the one I look to and not them.
I love you so much. (Even though you wear chick pants.) And what you said yesterday? I'm still smiling... I probably won't stop for a while.
Fucking SHIT I love this being happy business.
My mom's got soooo so so so much money coming in at the end of next month. I'm getting a new car, or at least she said I was. She said I could have whatever I wanted so I could upstage my cousins, haha. ..
Wow, I could get used to this.
My voice is being nice to me today so I'm gonna work on my set... I guess I'm playing like six or seven songs next week at some restauraunt? My mom set it up so I have no fucking clue what I'm doing, haha. It should be fun, however. I love playing restauraunts.
GAH I'm all fuckin' smiley. Yay for cinnamon raisin bread.
So last night, as Ben was driving me home, he pulled off to the side of the road and stared at me for five minutes at least. He kissed me one of those "make the whole world happy" kisses.
"When I can, I want to marry you."