what's going on?

[dcteas17]

i'm quite confused. i'm warning that this entry won't be as long as most of mine in the beginning, but oh well. i'm really confused with everything that's going on right now, and i really don't know what to do or who to turn to. i was really really depressed last night, but i didn't want to call anyone (specifically erica) because i wanted to try and solve it on my own, but it was really too much and i'm lucky allen and mary were online. sometimes i just need people to support me and tell me it's ok, and i feel really alone when nobody is willing to do it. i wish i could get all the answers that i want but they aren't available. i really miss erica, and sometimes i feel no matter how hard i'm trying to improve myself, she doesn't want me to be a part of her life until i'm near-perfect, which i most certainly am not. either way, i feel really alone sometimes, and that's depressing as it is. i had a bad day yesterday and it just made me feel horrible inside. sometimes i feel like nobody's listening and nobody is there for me to call, and i just don't know. hopefully today will be a better day, hopefully i'll improve a lot in a small amount of time, hopefully i'll become happier, hopefully erica will start liking me again, hopefully i'll feel more needed and loved. i don't know, sometimes it seems like it's all too much to hope for though. anyways, i'm not really depressed right now - just reminiscent of yesterday. so don't be too worried about me. i'll talk to you later

Daniel/Teasley