Hello...
I know I haven't posted in forever...I guess I just need to let some emotions out right now...I am just so fucking..confused and just so drained...Long story short, Adam and I spent about three and a half weeks together (which was wonderful beyond words)...And then D Momma basically flips out and tells me she wants Adam out and that we're taking advantage of her or something like that...So basically Adam left and we ended up spending almost a week apart which was EXTREMELY hard on both of us...So Sunday we were having a fish fry for Grandpa's birthday and I had been staying at their house for the weekend, helping Grandma out...So Adam of course would call there instead of my house or my cell (since I get no signal out there)...So Grandma answers the phone one of the times he calls and tells him he should come down for that, blahblahblah, before giving me the phone...He had said before that he didn't plan on coming back down here for a while...So when I went to bed that night, he still didn't know whether he was going to come down or not...I told him to call me in the morning and let me know, although when he did call in the morning, Grandma neglected to tell me and when I tried to call back his phone was off...So Grandma and I come down here and, to my utter shock and amazement, he came...At first I could tell he was still a bit standoffish, but then I accidentally woke him up when Daisy followed me while I was putting mangas up...The poor guy hadn't slept but a few hours the previous night....and we held each other and the tension just seemed to melt away...I've been working on cleaning my room recently and I kept working on it Sunday, with the exception of a few interruptions, and got a good bit of it done...Adam suggested I see if I could go back up with him for a few days since he had Monday and Tuesday off...So I asked D Momma and she said I could stay til Wednesday...He had to work Wednesday, so we asked if he could bring me back Thursday morning...she said okay...and of course throughout this whole exchange, I had to make a "deal"...I had to wait at least a week before asking to see him again...she suggested him maybe coming down once and spending one night or something before I go up to Converse....I grudgingly agreed...So I ended up going up with him...That night..just OMFG!!!!11!!!1111!!!!!ONE!!1111!!!!....heh, um, yeah, that night was really good, obviously, lol...well most of it anyway...so then we spent all of yesterday together, which was really nice...even if we did sleep most of the day away...But at one point we did go by Papa John's and turns out, he had to work Thursday, too...so we decided we would ask my mom if Friday morning is okay since that junk came up....Last night some guy called Adam's house and was talking to Adam about a trailer he's interested in renting-to-own...they set up a time for Adam to go look at it at 1130 today...So anyway, I wasn't feeling good, but Adam and I didn't end up going to sleep til about 8 this morning and almost overslept his meeting...he wakes up around 1105 or so and starts telling me to hurry and get ready...so we get there just a couple minutes late and this place is really nice, fully furnished and everything...500 a month...plus utilities and his other bills...yeah....So we go by McDonald's then back to his house...we lay down and are listening to some music and D Momma calls...apparently she's been sick and stayed home from work today...Anyway, the convo was going okay until I told her about the unexpected change in the work schedule, which neither of us knew about when I asked to stay til Thursday...anyway, long story short, she got pissed...said if I stayed til Friday I couldn't see him anymore before school, blahblahblah...And then she asked to talk to Adam and all that good junk...Anyway, Adam ended up bringing me home and we three, per D Momma's request, sat down and had a talk...I don't know...today has just been so damn stressful and I still have two weeks before I move in...I wish it were the 23rd already so I'd be moving in in the morning, but it's still two weeks away...And, I don't know...It's just really hard on both of us, neither of us are taking this very lightly....I've been crying almost constantly ever since she first called...I hate feeling like this...I hate being away from the only thing that makes me happy....I'm just sick of all this shit...God, I hope this goes by quickly...I don't know...I don't know anything anymore...All I know is that I love you more than I will ever be able to say, Adam, and I never want you to forget that.....I'm gonna end this here, I can already tell I'm about to break down and cry again....Bye yall....