What's in a Heart?
Title: What's in a Heart?
Author: Ryuuto
Rating: T to be safe
Characters/Parings: Joshua, hints of Neku, a dash of Naoya
Series: TWEWY, mentions of Devil Survivor
Warning: Joshua-centric, Vatheon stuff, post-body swap event, introspection, SPOILERS
Summary: It all started with a question, a rhetorical question made by a man with a bit of a grudge against him.
Joshua sat up on a high branch in the forest dome, hands behind his head, the perfect picture of a relaxed teenager. His lilac eyes were half-lidded, trained blindly at the "sky," expression normally so calm was completely blank as his thoughts focused inward. People rarely visited the forest in the underwater city, thus he could afford to drop a bit of his act. The world was a stage, after all.
"Do you even have a heart anymore?"
The words spoken by Naoya echoed in his mind, that smug smirk easily seen in his mind's eye. A smirk fit for a man driven to near insanity because of God's curse. His blood-red eyes brimming with the anger built up within thousands of years, a face framed by dusty white hair. Naoya was a man one could never forget the face of, constantly thinking in strategies and codes.
Yet, his 'words of wisdom' had struck a curious cord within Joshua. After their rather delightful conversation, he had retreated to the forest dome for peace, quiet, and time to think. He ran them in his head constantly, like a song on repeat, until it almost felt like he was asking himself the same question. Did the Composer of Shibuya have a heart?
Stupid question. The Composer does not have a heart. Emotions get in the way of work, after all. Yet, that thought brought out another question. What about Joshua? Yoshiya Kiryu, nicknamed Joshua by his parents and friends, did he have a heart? Did the man or boy behind the mask of Composer have anything to call a heart? Did he care about others? Did Joshua care that he had killed someone, someone young, to decide Shibuya's fate?
That made him falter in his thoughts because he had no answer to the barrage of questions his mind threw at him. Joshua could say with confidence that when he was alive, yes, he cared. He had a heart, a fragile one, but one all the same. The question was, could he say the same thing now? After almost a century of being both dead and alive? If Joshua was honest to himself, then his answer was quite simply that he wasn't sure. He was so used to death, of people dying for no reason, selfishness, or even in the name of 'justice' that he was numb to it. Death happened sooner or later, and came to everyone in the end. The only difference was the instrument Death used to steal the flame of life.
He had used that indifference when he shot and killed Neku in Udagawa. There was no care in the world that he had killed someone. All he knew about the kid was that he had a strong Imagination, and honestly had no reason to care about who the kid was. Yet, when the boy had a change of heart, Joshua also had a change within his own. If someone like Neku could change, then who was to say that the rest of Shibuya could, too? It was the first time in a long while he had felt that warm spark of hope when he noticed that, and was happy to find that perhaps he could pin those hopes on Neku for the time being.
So, perhaps, just perhaps, there was a heart underneath the calm facade of the Composer. If there was, then it was sleeping, and buried deep within him. Joshua pushed people away with his personality alone, which was fine by him. Connections made by one who was practically immortal were dangerous, leading to inevitable pain and heartbreak. Joshua let out a soft, forceful breath.
"Hmph, point goes to Naoya, I suppose."
Author: Ryuuto
Rating: T to be safe
Characters/Parings: Joshua, hints of Neku, a dash of Naoya
Series: TWEWY, mentions of Devil Survivor
Warning: Joshua-centric, Vatheon stuff, post-body swap event, introspection, SPOILERS
Summary: It all started with a question, a rhetorical question made by a man with a bit of a grudge against him.
Joshua sat up on a high branch in the forest dome, hands behind his head, the perfect picture of a relaxed teenager. His lilac eyes were half-lidded, trained blindly at the "sky," expression normally so calm was completely blank as his thoughts focused inward. People rarely visited the forest in the underwater city, thus he could afford to drop a bit of his act. The world was a stage, after all.
"Do you even have a heart anymore?"
The words spoken by Naoya echoed in his mind, that smug smirk easily seen in his mind's eye. A smirk fit for a man driven to near insanity because of God's curse. His blood-red eyes brimming with the anger built up within thousands of years, a face framed by dusty white hair. Naoya was a man one could never forget the face of, constantly thinking in strategies and codes.
Yet, his 'words of wisdom' had struck a curious cord within Joshua. After their rather delightful conversation, he had retreated to the forest dome for peace, quiet, and time to think. He ran them in his head constantly, like a song on repeat, until it almost felt like he was asking himself the same question. Did the Composer of Shibuya have a heart?
Stupid question. The Composer does not have a heart. Emotions get in the way of work, after all. Yet, that thought brought out another question. What about Joshua? Yoshiya Kiryu, nicknamed Joshua by his parents and friends, did he have a heart? Did the man or boy behind the mask of Composer have anything to call a heart? Did he care about others? Did Joshua care that he had killed someone, someone young, to decide Shibuya's fate?
That made him falter in his thoughts because he had no answer to the barrage of questions his mind threw at him. Joshua could say with confidence that when he was alive, yes, he cared. He had a heart, a fragile one, but one all the same. The question was, could he say the same thing now? After almost a century of being both dead and alive? If Joshua was honest to himself, then his answer was quite simply that he wasn't sure. He was so used to death, of people dying for no reason, selfishness, or even in the name of 'justice' that he was numb to it. Death happened sooner or later, and came to everyone in the end. The only difference was the instrument Death used to steal the flame of life.
He had used that indifference when he shot and killed Neku in Udagawa. There was no care in the world that he had killed someone. All he knew about the kid was that he had a strong Imagination, and honestly had no reason to care about who the kid was. Yet, when the boy had a change of heart, Joshua also had a change within his own. If someone like Neku could change, then who was to say that the rest of Shibuya could, too? It was the first time in a long while he had felt that warm spark of hope when he noticed that, and was happy to find that perhaps he could pin those hopes on Neku for the time being.
So, perhaps, just perhaps, there was a heart underneath the calm facade of the Composer. If there was, then it was sleeping, and buried deep within him. Joshua pushed people away with his personality alone, which was fine by him. Connections made by one who was practically immortal were dangerous, leading to inevitable pain and heartbreak. Joshua let out a soft, forceful breath.
"Hmph, point goes to Naoya, I suppose."