(no subject)
countdown to home- 10 days.
63.
pissed right now. hating people right now. hating two people in particular that i cant stand together. i think we all know who.
im at work right now. david got me a digital camera or christmas. i have nicknamed it digi. i like it lots. i feel bad tho. i dont know why, i bought him a damn ipod. its a fair trade! dammit! missing melissa. and rick. and everyone at home. want to go home. now. 10 days is too far away. must be home now.
heart is aching. what if im not what he expects? i think i am going to get there and be too afraid to go and see him at all and ill just hide and cry somewhere for the whole eleven days. i hate it when he talks to her because it seems like every conversation we've had and everything we've worked at and all the crap ive admitted becomes NOTHING. it becomes SHIT. i am SHIT. thats what i feel like when this happens.
i dont want to forget him. its 1120 i think i will go eat lunch, wallow in my self pity, do some crossword puzzles that i hate and take some more pictures. i like pictures. i should have taken photography. i should have gone to college.
i hate the navy.
and there i go, blaming all my problems on something else like its not my fault.
63.
pissed right now. hating people right now. hating two people in particular that i cant stand together. i think we all know who.
im at work right now. david got me a digital camera or christmas. i have nicknamed it digi. i like it lots. i feel bad tho. i dont know why, i bought him a damn ipod. its a fair trade! dammit! missing melissa. and rick. and everyone at home. want to go home. now. 10 days is too far away. must be home now.
heart is aching. what if im not what he expects? i think i am going to get there and be too afraid to go and see him at all and ill just hide and cry somewhere for the whole eleven days. i hate it when he talks to her because it seems like every conversation we've had and everything we've worked at and all the crap ive admitted becomes NOTHING. it becomes SHIT. i am SHIT. thats what i feel like when this happens.
i dont want to forget him. its 1120 i think i will go eat lunch, wallow in my self pity, do some crossword puzzles that i hate and take some more pictures. i like pictures. i should have taken photography. i should have gone to college.
i hate the navy.
and there i go, blaming all my problems on something else like its not my fault.