Surreal...
I think it has finally hit me. I was just lying in bed, after an emotionally exhausting- whirlwind month and there it was. I’m not going back. These past two weeks in Las Vegas with my family have not been another vacation. No, I’ve moved. My car is packed with the things I left at my parents a year ago. My car…that feels so weird to type. My car…the thing I’ve been driving around for the past two weeks. My car…the thing that needed new brakes today (err!), that needs an oil change and requires gas that is $3 a gallon to get me from point A to B.
I’m not going back. My mail has been forwarded. I can’t call NY home anymore.
I didn’t cry when the car drove away to the airport so why is it so hard to deal with now?
As most of you know, my Dad fell ill a few weeks ago and we’ve all come home to help out where we can and well, just let him know we love him and he needs to fight and hang on.
Aaron came to NY to visit on the 8th and we had an amazing time - taking in sights I’d never seen and doing nothing at all. One night we went on a picnic in Central Park and laid our blanket near Tavern on the Green in Sheep’s Meadow and at dusk we laid there and all the sudden, the band at Tavern on the Green started to play Moon River. We started to laugh because it was almost too perfect. I mean, you just can’t MAKE moments like that happen. We shopped on Canal, ate at new places, went to the Frying Pan at the Chelsea Piers, took photos of graffiti, bought cool things from street designers in Soho, got drunk at 10 in the morning at Rudy’s and I fell even deeper in love with a man who has grown to be one of my best friends.
I got the call that my Dad was sick and going to the hospital just a day or two into Aaron’s visit. When I went to Cabo we found out my Dad had Congestive Heart Failure so for him to be in the hospital was not a huge surprise. He had swelling throughout his body and they tried some water pills which did not work so my Mom convinced him to go back to the hospital. It was quickly determined the swelling caused the infection in my Dad’s bones to resurface and they would need to do another partial amputation on his left leg. (He had one done 2 years ago as well). My Dad’s heart was weak so they needed to try a stress test on him to see if his heart would be strong enough to go through the amputation surgery. During the stress test my Dad went into Cardiac Arrest but thankfully, they were able to revive him. After an angiogram they found he was in desperate need of a quadruple bypass procedure. It was right after the heart attack that I took my boxes to the UPS Store in NY and got on a plane to go home immediately. My Dad was in decent shape when I arrived and I was SO happy to see my half brother Shane, from Texas was also here with his wife, Tana. My sister Joy arrived from Portland the day prior and we filled his room with love and well wishes and prayers from loved ones far and wide.
The bypass procedure was initially to take 4 hours but 7 or so hours later the Dr’s emerged from the operating room to tell us the procedure was “difficult” and they also found a damaged value which they attempted to repair and with my Dad’s condition, 1 in 3 will not make it. After recovery we went to see him in ICU and although I knew it would be tough, nothing could have prepared me for seeing him that way with all those tubes in him. There were little spots of blood and iodine all over him. His tongue was so swollen it stuck out of his mouth with the tubes which were going into his stomach and somewhere else. He had a tube draining the blood from his leg where they cut the “good artery” used to repair his heart. His Dr. said the best kind of heart is a mended one. :)
I’m not going back. My mail has been forwarded. I can’t call NY home anymore.
I didn’t cry when the car drove away to the airport so why is it so hard to deal with now?
As most of you know, my Dad fell ill a few weeks ago and we’ve all come home to help out where we can and well, just let him know we love him and he needs to fight and hang on.
Aaron came to NY to visit on the 8th and we had an amazing time - taking in sights I’d never seen and doing nothing at all. One night we went on a picnic in Central Park and laid our blanket near Tavern on the Green in Sheep’s Meadow and at dusk we laid there and all the sudden, the band at Tavern on the Green started to play Moon River. We started to laugh because it was almost too perfect. I mean, you just can’t MAKE moments like that happen. We shopped on Canal, ate at new places, went to the Frying Pan at the Chelsea Piers, took photos of graffiti, bought cool things from street designers in Soho, got drunk at 10 in the morning at Rudy’s and I fell even deeper in love with a man who has grown to be one of my best friends.
I got the call that my Dad was sick and going to the hospital just a day or two into Aaron’s visit. When I went to Cabo we found out my Dad had Congestive Heart Failure so for him to be in the hospital was not a huge surprise. He had swelling throughout his body and they tried some water pills which did not work so my Mom convinced him to go back to the hospital. It was quickly determined the swelling caused the infection in my Dad’s bones to resurface and they would need to do another partial amputation on his left leg. (He had one done 2 years ago as well). My Dad’s heart was weak so they needed to try a stress test on him to see if his heart would be strong enough to go through the amputation surgery. During the stress test my Dad went into Cardiac Arrest but thankfully, they were able to revive him. After an angiogram they found he was in desperate need of a quadruple bypass procedure. It was right after the heart attack that I took my boxes to the UPS Store in NY and got on a plane to go home immediately. My Dad was in decent shape when I arrived and I was SO happy to see my half brother Shane, from Texas was also here with his wife, Tana. My sister Joy arrived from Portland the day prior and we filled his room with love and well wishes and prayers from loved ones far and wide.
The bypass procedure was initially to take 4 hours but 7 or so hours later the Dr’s emerged from the operating room to tell us the procedure was “difficult” and they also found a damaged value which they attempted to repair and with my Dad’s condition, 1 in 3 will not make it. After recovery we went to see him in ICU and although I knew it would be tough, nothing could have prepared me for seeing him that way with all those tubes in him. There were little spots of blood and iodine all over him. His tongue was so swollen it stuck out of his mouth with the tubes which were going into his stomach and somewhere else. He had a tube draining the blood from his leg where they cut the “good artery” used to repair his heart. His Dr. said the best kind of heart is a mended one. :)