Ever since she learnt to let go of the past she found her life was just beginning
Click to viewSo here it is, with just about two hours to go, this girl’s final blog of 2008! At least that is how much of the year we have left in England as I type! But what a year 2008 has been for me! One topic simply dominates my whole year. The final realization that it truly was a case of do or die! To grow old, bitter and twisted having kept the girl I has known I really am hidden away to die in the shadows or to let her finally fly free?
Over thirty years of keeping Davinia hidden and indeed getting married and having a family to make sure she would not suddenly appear had caused me decades of psychological problems. Which as you may have read were aided and abetted by my ex, who despite the overall subject of this blog I will continue to call Phoebe (meaning Psycho Bitch from Hell)
I could go on and on about the frankly appalling things Phoebe did, not just to me but to our children, but the past is indeed fading as my bright feminine future beckons and like Orlando in the clip above ‘I am learning to let go of the past. And my ‘feminine’ life is really just beginning!!
Sadly I cannot remember who posted the Orlando clip in one of her blogs earlier in the year, but I thank her from the bottom of my heart! It is one of those movies I SIMPLY HAVE TO SEE!!! If I understand the film at all the story is about ‘Orlando’ (Tilda Swanson) who is effectively transgendered and lives through centuries from Elizabethan times to the present day. The scene above from the film includes the song ‘Coming’ by Jimmy Somerville which includes the lyric |I am a woman and not a man!” Which is the verse that now perfectly fits my life! Especially as I know I really have jettisoned the past and my feminine future is at my beautifully manicured fingertips!! (OK, so I’m still biting my fingernails, but the positive thinking really changed my life last year, maybe it will improve my nails this!!)