Trust
Have been thinking through what a friend said to me just a week ago about how lying actually keeps relationships, in her opinion.
For someone who held on to the belief that there needs to be both love and trust in a relationship, I couldn't agree with that no matter how much I tried to look at things from her point of view. I've held on to that belief in the past 7 years of my life and I have to say that it's not something which I've settled for after that came to me. And anyway, do I look like someone who would stop thinking about things? I would even rethink about my faith from time to time. So yes, throughout the past 7 years, I've been asking myself, "today, being who you are right now, do you still believe that love and trust are essential in any relationships?" and I tried debating against myself. At the end of the day, my final answer is still yes.
I actually thought that I would leave this topic in my old blogs and not talk about it anymore but today, I feel a need to talk about it again, but bringing up something different this time.
Like what I've said to her, if lying is the way to go, I would have lied to her a thousand times. I would actually like to ask her, would you rather I've lied to you and would you rather I start lying to you from now on? If this keeps a friendship, why not right?
A problem which I face when meeting someone new is always this, can I and should I trust you with this? Well, because there isn't any trust. I can't imagine how things will be like if I have to keep thinking about this even when I'm with my friends whom I've probably known for long. Worst of all, when both parties start to lie to each other, hmm... that will be quite a good show.
We take time to draw close to someone and to be comfortable with them. That's because we take time to find out who that person is before placing our trust in that person, whether consciously or subconsciously. If lying keeps a friendship, that would mean we've wasted our time doing all these. Seriously. Why spend so much time with each other when trust doesn't need to exist in a friendship? Or why spend so much time getting to know each other and building that trust if lying can keep your friendship? If lying's the way to go, I have a lot of friends, a lot.
Or how about having truths and lies staggered? Hmm... How about I tell you I don't know what to believe anymore? I mean, I wouldn't know when you are telling the truth and when I should believe you. For my own safety, I'll step behind the (yellow) line lest I fall into some lies.
Friends, this is the belief I hold.
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