Marriage Issues...
Three months ago I a gave birth to my second (and last, if I have any say in the matter) child. All throughout my pregnancy my husband and I discussed whether or not this would be our last. My husband said that if it was a girl, he was fine not having anymore children (one boy, one girl). It was, so I got my tubes tied. However, the expectation was that my husband would get fixed as well.
Tubal Ligation is not 100%. I have had two cousins get pregnant after having a tubal done. One got pregnant 3 years after her tubal, the other got pregnant 15(!) years after hers. They lived in different states, so it's not like one doctor screwed 'em both. I got pregnant with both of my kids while on birth control. With the first I was on the pill and the second I was getting the shot (administered by a doctor). I got pregnant with my second child, less than 18 months after having my first child; despite following all instructions with both forms of prevention.
My OB just shrugged when he confirmed my second pregnancy. He said birth control isn't 100% and given my family history he said is seems like mother nature just wants the women in my family to get pregnant. I know TWO women who have had tubals that failed and I absolutely DO NOT want any more children.
My husband is refusing to get a vasectomy. Fine. That's his right. However, I am refusing to have sex until he either gets a vasectomy or he uses a condom. He refuses both. However, he will not explain to me his reasons. It has caused a lot of friction in my marriage and frankly, I'm over it. My life is so overwhelming as it is without my husband being a stubborn ox without explanation. He refuses to discuss it, keeps pushing for sex, and the other day I literally had to knee him in the junk to get away from him. (He kept trying to initiate sex, kept pushing, and wouldn't leave me alone, even thought I told him no MULTIPLE times). He isn't listening or communicating, and I'm just at a loss. He normally isn't like this, so I just don't understand.
Tubal Ligation is not 100%. I have had two cousins get pregnant after having a tubal done. One got pregnant 3 years after her tubal, the other got pregnant 15(!) years after hers. They lived in different states, so it's not like one doctor screwed 'em both. I got pregnant with both of my kids while on birth control. With the first I was on the pill and the second I was getting the shot (administered by a doctor). I got pregnant with my second child, less than 18 months after having my first child; despite following all instructions with both forms of prevention.
My OB just shrugged when he confirmed my second pregnancy. He said birth control isn't 100% and given my family history he said is seems like mother nature just wants the women in my family to get pregnant. I know TWO women who have had tubals that failed and I absolutely DO NOT want any more children.
My husband is refusing to get a vasectomy. Fine. That's his right. However, I am refusing to have sex until he either gets a vasectomy or he uses a condom. He refuses both. However, he will not explain to me his reasons. It has caused a lot of friction in my marriage and frankly, I'm over it. My life is so overwhelming as it is without my husband being a stubborn ox without explanation. He refuses to discuss it, keeps pushing for sex, and the other day I literally had to knee him in the junk to get away from him. (He kept trying to initiate sex, kept pushing, and wouldn't leave me alone, even thought I told him no MULTIPLE times). He isn't listening or communicating, and I'm just at a loss. He normally isn't like this, so I just don't understand.