1st trick

[gobbammit]

[Sometimes incredibly buff men show up in Coruscant and destroy a droid while standing around letting women admire his abs

Comments

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[hellodeadpeople]

The fuck kind of name is 'Gob'? Your mother hate you or something?

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[gobbammit]

Yes.

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[hellodeadpeople]

[ That... actually gets a half-snort half-laugh kind of thing ] Well hey, you and me both, join the party.

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[gobbammit]

Anyway, it's my initials. And what party?

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[hellodeadpeople]

And you would choose to go by that instead of a first name why? Party for people with fucked up parentage. Also? Welcome to space hell. No one wants your ransom.

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[gobbammit]

It makes things... easier. Why am I in space? And since when do people not want a ransom?

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[hellodeadpeople]

I'll be glad to take your ransom, man, but it's not gonna get you anywhere. You ever heard of Star Wars?

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[gobbammit]

Of course I've heard of Star Wars. What do you think, that I live under a rock?

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[hellodeadpeople]

With a name like 'Gob'? Nah. Wouldn't surprise me. Got that caveman ring to it.

Besides, not everyone's from your world here.

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[gobbammit]

What, do you mean... poor people?

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[hellodeadpeople]

No, I mean Hutts and Twi-liks. You're not in Kansas anymore, Dorothy. Take a look outside.

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[gobbammit]

I looked. Was I transported to Hollywood somehow?

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[hellodeadpeople]

You're really not getting this, are you? You are in Star Wars, champ. This is Coruscant. One of the guys outside shoots you with his blaster and you'll be real dead real fast. No CGI required.