abstract thought #571

[das_ente]

Ok, I thought I'd share with you a weird thought I had on my way home last night. Here's the scenario: I was driving home to Pottsville last night after unloading yet another 45 tons of shit from my apartment. Amongst the things you'd expect normal people to have in their apts aka clothes, food, tv computer, that sort of thing, I have amusingly useless things. I have a cast iron original gumball machine that I fill with treats that I and others can enjoy. I have a Drink-O-Matic, and wonderful but ultimately useless soda machine, which dispenses 5 different kinds of soda with the push of a button, as well as storing it, and keeping it cold. I have a space-invaders floormat, with the scrolling space-invaders that soar across it as it lights up when it senses movement. I have a biosphere, a christmas present from last year, it houses 2 shrimp who can live indefinitely in their glass home with nothing bun sunlight to influence the life-cycle within its walls. Most recently, my present from my dad! another useless but amusing thing: A R2 D2 trash can! It like a regular step-lid trashcan except his dome head pops open to collect the trash. I know what you're thinking, Im gonna get so much ass when I bring girls back to my apartment with all this cool stuff, right? Yeah, I thought so. Anyway, I digress. the point is, I have alot of crap, in addition to the gadgets and gizmos I have my 2 pet turtles. My turtles go with me everywhere, and likely for much of my life yet to come since no one warned me the damn things live on average of 40 years. So, since I've had em for only 15 years, its likely I may pass them on to my kids! O.o Anyway, I had my turtles in the car with me, on the way home. Im travelling on the highways at the old-man speed of 60 mph. It occurs to me that since my car is moving at 60mph my body, in a sitting position of course is also travelling at 60mph. Ergo, my 2 turtles are moving at 60 mph, which means that at that particular point, I may have the fastest turtles in the country! Unless, of course someone else is travelling with turtles at 65 mph, but I feel few people are travelling with turtles at any given point so they may have been the fastest turtles in the state of PA on Saturday December 22nd or the fastest turtles for the month of december. Either way, I'm sure I broke a turtle speed record yesterday.

Which brings me to me next point: Frohliche Weinacht's
Hope everyone has a good, decent or at least not-shitty, Christmas. For me, I'll likely get more crap I wont know where to put, but thats how I am, and I'll be happy with that.