shut up and smoke.
I'm so bored, so I figured I'd write.
I was casually watching that Gene Simmons Family Jewels show earlier tonight and his son wore two different Black Keys shirts in the same episode. I was pleasantly tickled!
Just going through some file dump discs I've got laying around my computer desk, was looking at a bunch of pictures I've saved over the past while. (I uploaded a ton of awesome stuff over at my Facebook page). Tons of inspiration and imagery that I was practically creaming over, and yet for some reason, even though I'm in the mood to get dirty and make art, I just can't seem to overcome this artistic block I've had for the past few months. I'm not even entirely happy with my "la petit mort" series. I guess I just feel like I have the capability to do way better stuff, but it ain't flowing out for some reason. Blargh.
So my band has a show this Thursday at the bar that I work out. I'm super nervous because performing in front of the people I work with and my whole TAH "crowd" is really intimidating! We're talking about a small community full of old, experienced punks and rockers who have been around the block, musically, in this town, and who have seen it all. That's fully nerve-wracking! This is only our fourth show, and I'm still kind of insecure about my stage presence. But I've decided that fuck it, I'm just going to get right into it and giv'er... dive right in and get loose. Why the hell not, what do I have to lose? I'd rather be at least mildly entertaining onstage than be a total bore. Not having an instrument in front of me to hide behind (minus the organ that I play on one of our songs) makes me feel so vulnerable - I'm not used to it yet. I'm used to having my bass in front of me... it makes me feel looser, you know, 'cause I can hide behind my hair and just get into whatever I'm playing. But when you're singing it's like... well for one, my eyes have to make more contact and that in itself is terrifying. I hate making eye contact.
Wah wah wah.
I've got to get down to business and finish (or should I say start...) writing lyrics for that new song. Fuck, why do I always leave that shit until like three days before we have a show? What's my fucking malfunction?
Also, even though I'm having a wicked time doing Coyote Hotel and singing, I still am dying to put together a sloppy, furious garage band to play bass in/write fast, simple, fuzzy songs for. I wish Jenny was still really driven to start a band together, but she has two kids now and a fancy big-time job... so it doesn't really work. Sometimes I think I'm always going to be a careless teenager for the rest of my life. I guess there's nothing wrong with that though. Maybe that gives me a certain spiritual and mental freedom that most people don't have once they get past their college years.
Other stuff:
>Put up some more decorations on my tree tonight. It looks way better now.
>I'm as in love with my cat as I've ever been. We're BFFs.
>Had a good chat with Dave tonight about some stuff that's been bothering me. I think it was pretty pro-active of me, especially since it's stuff I've been holding in for awhile now.
>I'm going to buy either an external harddrive or install extra RAM in my computer this week. There are so many movies I want to download right now (mostly old) but I ain't got no more space on this machine. She's truckin' along but getting really full, so I figure I'll give her a break for awhile.
>Went out onto the balcony for awhile tonight to try and catch some Geminids meteors. I think I may have seen a few but it might have also just been my eyes playing tricks on my through the Hamilton fog. Fucking Hamilton. And all of the light-polluted city centers. When do I get to move to the Arizona desert with the clear desert skies, plz? Hopefully it's not too hazy later tonight so that perhaps I can really take in some sky dances (the Geminid shower continues on through until the morning of the 15th).
I wish more people were awake at 5am. I love my moon-lit solitude, but sometimes being a night owl is a lonely way to be.
Decided I'm going to pull an all-night tonight. Gonna walk over to the coffee shop once dawn breaks and get myself some coffee and a bagel, and then it's time to plow through this song for a few hours and get shit done.
I was casually watching that Gene Simmons Family Jewels show earlier tonight and his son wore two different Black Keys shirts in the same episode. I was pleasantly tickled!
Just going through some file dump discs I've got laying around my computer desk, was looking at a bunch of pictures I've saved over the past while. (I uploaded a ton of awesome stuff over at my Facebook page). Tons of inspiration and imagery that I was practically creaming over, and yet for some reason, even though I'm in the mood to get dirty and make art, I just can't seem to overcome this artistic block I've had for the past few months. I'm not even entirely happy with my "la petit mort" series. I guess I just feel like I have the capability to do way better stuff, but it ain't flowing out for some reason. Blargh.
So my band has a show this Thursday at the bar that I work out. I'm super nervous because performing in front of the people I work with and my whole TAH "crowd" is really intimidating! We're talking about a small community full of old, experienced punks and rockers who have been around the block, musically, in this town, and who have seen it all. That's fully nerve-wracking! This is only our fourth show, and I'm still kind of insecure about my stage presence. But I've decided that fuck it, I'm just going to get right into it and giv'er... dive right in and get loose. Why the hell not, what do I have to lose? I'd rather be at least mildly entertaining onstage than be a total bore. Not having an instrument in front of me to hide behind (minus the organ that I play on one of our songs) makes me feel so vulnerable - I'm not used to it yet. I'm used to having my bass in front of me... it makes me feel looser, you know, 'cause I can hide behind my hair and just get into whatever I'm playing. But when you're singing it's like... well for one, my eyes have to make more contact and that in itself is terrifying. I hate making eye contact.
Wah wah wah.
I've got to get down to business and finish (or should I say start...) writing lyrics for that new song. Fuck, why do I always leave that shit until like three days before we have a show? What's my fucking malfunction?
Also, even though I'm having a wicked time doing Coyote Hotel and singing, I still am dying to put together a sloppy, furious garage band to play bass in/write fast, simple, fuzzy songs for. I wish Jenny was still really driven to start a band together, but she has two kids now and a fancy big-time job... so it doesn't really work. Sometimes I think I'm always going to be a careless teenager for the rest of my life. I guess there's nothing wrong with that though. Maybe that gives me a certain spiritual and mental freedom that most people don't have once they get past their college years.
Other stuff:
>Put up some more decorations on my tree tonight. It looks way better now.
>I'm as in love with my cat as I've ever been. We're BFFs.
>Had a good chat with Dave tonight about some stuff that's been bothering me. I think it was pretty pro-active of me, especially since it's stuff I've been holding in for awhile now.
>I'm going to buy either an external harddrive or install extra RAM in my computer this week. There are so many movies I want to download right now (mostly old) but I ain't got no more space on this machine. She's truckin' along but getting really full, so I figure I'll give her a break for awhile.
>Went out onto the balcony for awhile tonight to try and catch some Geminids meteors. I think I may have seen a few but it might have also just been my eyes playing tricks on my through the Hamilton fog. Fucking Hamilton. And all of the light-polluted city centers. When do I get to move to the Arizona desert with the clear desert skies, plz? Hopefully it's not too hazy later tonight so that perhaps I can really take in some sky dances (the Geminid shower continues on through until the morning of the 15th).
I wish more people were awake at 5am. I love my moon-lit solitude, but sometimes being a night owl is a lonely way to be.
Decided I'm going to pull an all-night tonight. Gonna walk over to the coffee shop once dawn breaks and get myself some coffee and a bagel, and then it's time to plow through this song for a few hours and get shit done.