Infatuation, Insanity, Incoherence
Nigatsu Daikirai! (I hate Februaries)
Adonai...
I lift up my head, and I cried...
My Adonai...
The maker of this moment...
Author of my hope and freedom...
It has almost been two years since the first and currently only time I've heard that song.It fits the theme of the moment, Lent having started yesterday."Adonai", of course, is hebrew for "lord". I'm feeling my faith in the Divine coming back, for some reason. I remembered the song a few days ago, after having accidentaly broken my zen. Now I think I'm suffering from earbud music widthrawal and am slowly going insane.
Yes, lately I have been suffering successive waves of sadness, depression, and bouts of insanity, again because of an unknown reason. probably because of the february atmosphere, hence, my opening remark. It was also almost two years ago that I created that February Mantra "Love? Love? There was no love! love is just a myth.", twisting a quote from a cartoon character which referred to ice. Come to think of it, those two februaries have opened a new door of biterness within me. Yes, it's probably the February atmosphere, with all these sweethearts going around. As Jeun had asked me this afternoon, yes. I tend to get jealous real easily. Sadly, today was yet again, another bleak and cold February day (and no, this is not an emo exaggeration. It really felt cold, my legs really shook, and the sky was not exactly bright). The fact that we had no geology (Sir Tabin was Late) didn't help the cold. My idea of staying warm was to curl up in the corner near the door and sing what my hazy memory remembers of song lyrics. Christian thought I was going nuts. I agree with him. I tried to hold on to our Geology attendance sheet for as Long as possible until Cygne came to school and had time to sign it (She is, after all, at risk of dropping Geo 11). But I failed. Mr. Tabin came to our room after psych and demanded the sheet immediately. I had to oblige. he told me to give Fame a warning (Apparently, she woke up in the middle of psych, and managed to get late into Math 17). Cygne has proven to be a challenge of a blockmate, albeit not a full one at that. She's very nice and considerate, but has trouble setting her priorities straight (either that or I just misunderstand her). I just want to return the favor for her kindness. You can take it the wrong way, if you like; it's no big deal for me, really.
We didn't have any Communications 2 today; Ms. Miciano gave us a writing break. I did saw her going to PGH after psych. She goes there a lot for some reason. I spent my lunchtime trying to complete my NSTP. And I did. But with only three hours, all I could do was rearrange the files and read the entire time. I finished "Many Waters" already. Truth be told, the ending, like most novel endings, was really bad. Okay, maybe unsatisfactory, but you get the point.Kind of like the ending of Harry Potter and The Alchemist. It was more of "For want of an ending", not a very good one where a glimpse of the past events in the book were revisited. Anyway, I spent the remainder of my time at the University library, where I used the OPAC to get the call numbers for some of the books I'll be using for my COMM project. There were a lot of pharmacy students in the University Library, maybe because it's the closest library to their area of the University and the CP lib is lacking. I'm not really sure. Maybe I should stop viewing things in a CAS point of view.
Have I mentioned eating lunch? I didn't eat any lunch. Ha ha.]
Moving on, I went back to CAS to get my ESF ready. I forced fame to meet up with Jeun, but not before pouring my heart to Jeun about my love sickness (ugh! I really hate Februaries!). Anyway, I found out that Cygne is like that because she's really busy. I don't know what she's busy about but I'll have to take her word for it. I have to trust her; She's smart enough to run her own life, after all. I just want to help and have a purpose (In my psychology values thing this morning, I said I'd trade my happiness to get a purpose). Ma'am Gonzales was not in the OPD, so I guess the end of my NSTP would only be official tomorrow. To think I spent 54 hours in that clinic... whew...
So to end my day, I had another wonderful class with OMAKE. I love this org, as it really makes me forget my worries. I repeated Az's tuesday lecture with a little help from DM, who became my assistant (He actually gets Az. I just teach because I know already). I ordered Dennis to get me some "cha" or "kohi". He went back saying there's none, and when I came back, there was still coffee and tea. That sarcastic little twit...
That's basically my day...I would still have to translate "UP ang galing mo" and "Cleaning out my closet" into japanese. THe OMAKE people really liked it when I made an impression of a japanese eminem going gomen nasai okaasan... Ha ha. And then I'm helping DM< and Deniss in their fantasy of "Obure-sama", where the oblation is this uber-powerful mecha that destroys monsters called "Tofi".
She's like drugs... I go insane if I don't get even a whiff of her but I convulse when I get too much...
Adonai...
I lift up my head, and I cried...
My Adonai...
The maker of this moment...
Author of my hope and freedom...
It has almost been two years since the first and currently only time I've heard that song.It fits the theme of the moment, Lent having started yesterday."Adonai", of course, is hebrew for "lord". I'm feeling my faith in the Divine coming back, for some reason. I remembered the song a few days ago, after having accidentaly broken my zen. Now I think I'm suffering from earbud music widthrawal and am slowly going insane.
Yes, lately I have been suffering successive waves of sadness, depression, and bouts of insanity, again because of an unknown reason. probably because of the february atmosphere, hence, my opening remark. It was also almost two years ago that I created that February Mantra "Love? Love? There was no love! love is just a myth.", twisting a quote from a cartoon character which referred to ice. Come to think of it, those two februaries have opened a new door of biterness within me. Yes, it's probably the February atmosphere, with all these sweethearts going around. As Jeun had asked me this afternoon, yes. I tend to get jealous real easily. Sadly, today was yet again, another bleak and cold February day (and no, this is not an emo exaggeration. It really felt cold, my legs really shook, and the sky was not exactly bright). The fact that we had no geology (Sir Tabin was Late) didn't help the cold. My idea of staying warm was to curl up in the corner near the door and sing what my hazy memory remembers of song lyrics. Christian thought I was going nuts. I agree with him. I tried to hold on to our Geology attendance sheet for as Long as possible until Cygne came to school and had time to sign it (She is, after all, at risk of dropping Geo 11). But I failed. Mr. Tabin came to our room after psych and demanded the sheet immediately. I had to oblige. he told me to give Fame a warning (Apparently, she woke up in the middle of psych, and managed to get late into Math 17). Cygne has proven to be a challenge of a blockmate, albeit not a full one at that. She's very nice and considerate, but has trouble setting her priorities straight (either that or I just misunderstand her). I just want to return the favor for her kindness. You can take it the wrong way, if you like; it's no big deal for me, really.
We didn't have any Communications 2 today; Ms. Miciano gave us a writing break. I did saw her going to PGH after psych. She goes there a lot for some reason. I spent my lunchtime trying to complete my NSTP. And I did. But with only three hours, all I could do was rearrange the files and read the entire time. I finished "Many Waters" already. Truth be told, the ending, like most novel endings, was really bad. Okay, maybe unsatisfactory, but you get the point.Kind of like the ending of Harry Potter and The Alchemist. It was more of "For want of an ending", not a very good one where a glimpse of the past events in the book were revisited. Anyway, I spent the remainder of my time at the University library, where I used the OPAC to get the call numbers for some of the books I'll be using for my COMM project. There were a lot of pharmacy students in the University Library, maybe because it's the closest library to their area of the University and the CP lib is lacking. I'm not really sure. Maybe I should stop viewing things in a CAS point of view.
Have I mentioned eating lunch? I didn't eat any lunch. Ha ha.]
Moving on, I went back to CAS to get my ESF ready. I forced fame to meet up with Jeun, but not before pouring my heart to Jeun about my love sickness (ugh! I really hate Februaries!). Anyway, I found out that Cygne is like that because she's really busy. I don't know what she's busy about but I'll have to take her word for it. I have to trust her; She's smart enough to run her own life, after all. I just want to help and have a purpose (In my psychology values thing this morning, I said I'd trade my happiness to get a purpose). Ma'am Gonzales was not in the OPD, so I guess the end of my NSTP would only be official tomorrow. To think I spent 54 hours in that clinic... whew...
So to end my day, I had another wonderful class with OMAKE. I love this org, as it really makes me forget my worries. I repeated Az's tuesday lecture with a little help from DM, who became my assistant (He actually gets Az. I just teach because I know already). I ordered Dennis to get me some "cha" or "kohi". He went back saying there's none, and when I came back, there was still coffee and tea. That sarcastic little twit...
That's basically my day...I would still have to translate "UP ang galing mo" and "Cleaning out my closet" into japanese. THe OMAKE people really liked it when I made an impression of a japanese eminem going gomen nasai okaasan... Ha ha. And then I'm helping DM< and Deniss in their fantasy of "Obure-sama", where the oblation is this uber-powerful mecha that destroys monsters called "Tofi".
She's like drugs... I go insane if I don't get even a whiff of her but I convulse when I get too much...