Things are changing
Wow, so much has changed so quickly
So on Sunday, I was having a really good day. My friend Lance called me up and asked if I wanted to go see Slumdog Millionaire at the E Street Cinema. I like that place and heard good things about that movie and so I said sure let's do it.
We see the movie and it was really really good. I really liked it. I plan on going back to that theater every other week to see something. I want to see Milk and Doubt and this other one that's playing there right now. It should be a good time as long as I find people to go with.
Anyway after the movie we head to a bar for a drink and are hanging out there and having a good time. It was really a nice night until I get home. I see then on Facebook that one of my best friends from my childhood was murdered earlier in the day in Charlotte NC and then I see that Andrea got back with her ex boyfriend.
Those two things definitely took my night down. I had been really close to Jay growing up. There were times that he would have been considered my best friend for awhile when Jason wasn't around as much anymore. I haven't talked to him in maybe 5 or 6 years. We grew apart pretty quickly. Actually I grew apart from all of my childhood friends basically for awhile when a lot of them started using drugs and I didn't. I stayed somewhat close to some of them and still talk to a few of them and I'm extremely happy that Jason has gotten his life turned around. I talked to him for a bit yesterday about all of this. It's just crazy. I want to go to the funeral but I doubt that I'll be able to.
As for Andrea, well when I found out about that I got very angry. Not completely angry at her, though there was some of that, but angry about everything. I feel like I was used. This has happened to me before. I enter someone's life at a time when they need someone like me, I help them with their life and figure things out, and then when I"m not needed, they just want to be friends because I'm one of the nicest people in the world. The biggest thing about this was that she had about a billion opportunities to tell me and she chose the non-confrontational route. I had to find out from facebook. She let me continue to email her telling her how much I still liked her and wanted a relationship and she was never direct with me. Things could have been a lot easier if she would have told me straight up earlier.
However, it's been over 24 hours. Yesterday was kind of rough for awhile. I had sent her an email expressing my thoughts about it but she didn't reply. I honestly don't expect her to reply. All I would like from her now though is just an apology. A two sentence email would suffice. I'm not really mad at her anymore. She is doing what makes her the happiest. That's all I want. If the little fling we had for a few months ends up making her and Chris stronger and better then that's great. It really is. I really do want her and them to be happy and good. Eventually I would just like someone to be the happiest they can be with me. I know it'll happen and I'm not worried that it won't. It just can really suck sometimes when you think you found that person and then they don't think the same.
What I've learned from this situation is that when you take some big risks there can be high rewards or some major losses. I ignored all of the red flags and all of my personal rules of dating for this. I took a big chance and followed my heart. There are tons of lessons here to be learned but I know myself. I would do the same thing all over again, well with a few adjustments. I don't really regret anything that happened with Andrea, I do wish it could have began and ended differently but hey that's life. I don't know when/if I'll ever talk to her again. I left it up to her to begin communication again with me. I know that probably means that she won't because she'll be concerned with how I'm feeling, but she said she wanted me to be in her life. Besides, I don't think Chris will be too happy with me and Andrea being friends. He already puts a lot of blame on me for them breaking up in October, so if it will make them stronger and happier to put all of the blame on me for that, then that's fine. Though long term they're probably avoiding some issues, right now it's probably good for them.
Anyway, yesterday was a bad day for other reasons too. I couldn't pick up my paycheck because of not being registered for enough classes. That should be solved by the end of this week and hopefully I'll get my paycheck then as well. Ugh another class.... but that means I'm taking a class on Capitol Hill whoo hoo
Also Ohio State lost last night, but it actually was a really good game and Ohio State didn't get blown out! Haha that was the important thing here. I'm looking forward to next year already.
Well one of my big goals this semester is to take advantage of DC more. So I'm trying to come up with a list of places to go and things to see. I'm already planning a trip to the Portrait gallery when they open the Lincoln exhibit and I would like to see the Newseum. Also looking at getting tickets to see the White House, Supreme Court and Capitol building. I need to find some new bars and other nightlife attractions too. I want to see something at the Kennedy Center at some point too. So much to look forward to.
I'm also looking to volunteer at a few different places as well. I applied for a volunteer job at the National Zoo with the monkeys, though honestly I would love to have one with the Cheetahs lol
At the same time that I'm planning on seeing a lot more of DC, I'm also planning some trips to Boston, CT and NJ. So that should be fun as well.
So much to do this year. 2009 started off on a very very bad foot for me, but I refuse to let that get me down. I'm going to have a really good year this year. I'm also going to find someone that really wants to be with me and find a job/place to be at for the next 3 years of my life.
Next step is to get some Ohio people to move out here haha
So on Sunday, I was having a really good day. My friend Lance called me up and asked if I wanted to go see Slumdog Millionaire at the E Street Cinema. I like that place and heard good things about that movie and so I said sure let's do it.
We see the movie and it was really really good. I really liked it. I plan on going back to that theater every other week to see something. I want to see Milk and Doubt and this other one that's playing there right now. It should be a good time as long as I find people to go with.
Anyway after the movie we head to a bar for a drink and are hanging out there and having a good time. It was really a nice night until I get home. I see then on Facebook that one of my best friends from my childhood was murdered earlier in the day in Charlotte NC and then I see that Andrea got back with her ex boyfriend.
Those two things definitely took my night down. I had been really close to Jay growing up. There were times that he would have been considered my best friend for awhile when Jason wasn't around as much anymore. I haven't talked to him in maybe 5 or 6 years. We grew apart pretty quickly. Actually I grew apart from all of my childhood friends basically for awhile when a lot of them started using drugs and I didn't. I stayed somewhat close to some of them and still talk to a few of them and I'm extremely happy that Jason has gotten his life turned around. I talked to him for a bit yesterday about all of this. It's just crazy. I want to go to the funeral but I doubt that I'll be able to.
As for Andrea, well when I found out about that I got very angry. Not completely angry at her, though there was some of that, but angry about everything. I feel like I was used. This has happened to me before. I enter someone's life at a time when they need someone like me, I help them with their life and figure things out, and then when I"m not needed, they just want to be friends because I'm one of the nicest people in the world. The biggest thing about this was that she had about a billion opportunities to tell me and she chose the non-confrontational route. I had to find out from facebook. She let me continue to email her telling her how much I still liked her and wanted a relationship and she was never direct with me. Things could have been a lot easier if she would have told me straight up earlier.
However, it's been over 24 hours. Yesterday was kind of rough for awhile. I had sent her an email expressing my thoughts about it but she didn't reply. I honestly don't expect her to reply. All I would like from her now though is just an apology. A two sentence email would suffice. I'm not really mad at her anymore. She is doing what makes her the happiest. That's all I want. If the little fling we had for a few months ends up making her and Chris stronger and better then that's great. It really is. I really do want her and them to be happy and good. Eventually I would just like someone to be the happiest they can be with me. I know it'll happen and I'm not worried that it won't. It just can really suck sometimes when you think you found that person and then they don't think the same.
What I've learned from this situation is that when you take some big risks there can be high rewards or some major losses. I ignored all of the red flags and all of my personal rules of dating for this. I took a big chance and followed my heart. There are tons of lessons here to be learned but I know myself. I would do the same thing all over again, well with a few adjustments. I don't really regret anything that happened with Andrea, I do wish it could have began and ended differently but hey that's life. I don't know when/if I'll ever talk to her again. I left it up to her to begin communication again with me. I know that probably means that she won't because she'll be concerned with how I'm feeling, but she said she wanted me to be in her life. Besides, I don't think Chris will be too happy with me and Andrea being friends. He already puts a lot of blame on me for them breaking up in October, so if it will make them stronger and happier to put all of the blame on me for that, then that's fine. Though long term they're probably avoiding some issues, right now it's probably good for them.
Anyway, yesterday was a bad day for other reasons too. I couldn't pick up my paycheck because of not being registered for enough classes. That should be solved by the end of this week and hopefully I'll get my paycheck then as well. Ugh another class.... but that means I'm taking a class on Capitol Hill whoo hoo
Also Ohio State lost last night, but it actually was a really good game and Ohio State didn't get blown out! Haha that was the important thing here. I'm looking forward to next year already.
Well one of my big goals this semester is to take advantage of DC more. So I'm trying to come up with a list of places to go and things to see. I'm already planning a trip to the Portrait gallery when they open the Lincoln exhibit and I would like to see the Newseum. Also looking at getting tickets to see the White House, Supreme Court and Capitol building. I need to find some new bars and other nightlife attractions too. I want to see something at the Kennedy Center at some point too. So much to look forward to.
I'm also looking to volunteer at a few different places as well. I applied for a volunteer job at the National Zoo with the monkeys, though honestly I would love to have one with the Cheetahs lol
At the same time that I'm planning on seeing a lot more of DC, I'm also planning some trips to Boston, CT and NJ. So that should be fun as well.
So much to do this year. 2009 started off on a very very bad foot for me, but I refuse to let that get me down. I'm going to have a really good year this year. I'm also going to find someone that really wants to be with me and find a job/place to be at for the next 3 years of my life.
Next step is to get some Ohio people to move out here haha