( Video under cut//disturbing content//don't watch if squeamish )

You are very dear friends and a bunch of morons.  One of you is a huge, gigantic-sized moron that I haven't uncovered the identity of yet, but I'm going to and when that happens I will smack you.

I don't need you to jump in on my behalf with him.  All you're doing is letting him know where my weaknesses are.  I don't want to fight him.  I'm not ( Read more... )

[sounds of background fighting and screaming]

You know how....some people look back on their life [clang of metal] Goddammit.

.....and say things like "you know that measles shot I had to get when I was six really wasn't that horribly painful"...

[seven syllables of words that don't exist]

Why do I get to look back at my life and say shit like...."oh ( Read more... )

...Cats.

Why did it have to be cats?