(Untitled)

[darkest0knight]

...Cats.

Why did it have to be cats?

Comments

[stokerwasahack]

May I suggest not attempting to drag one of these out from beneath furniture?

[darkest0knight]

Not funny, Henry. Stop mocking my pain.

[stokerwasahack]

I'm sorry, Tony. What would you prefer?

[darkest0knight]

I'd prefer the cats to be a fucking normal size.

[stokerwasahack]

As that is, regrettably, something I can't do for you, would you prefer something else?

[darkest0knight]

Can you shoo away the one in front of the apartment window, maybe? It's creeping me out.

[stokerwasahack]

... I'm not certain that's within my capabilities.

[darkest0knight]

What's the point of having a vampire buddy if you can't sic him on giant cats?

[stokerwasahack]

Think about that sentence for a moment. "Giant cats." Normal cats simply acknowledge that I'm a fellow predator and move on with their lives. A giant cat has every reason to ignore me.

[darkest0knight]

So throw it some catnip. Away from me.

[stokerwasahack]

You're not thinking clearly. Giant. Cat. How much catnip do you think I have?

[darkest0knight]

A lot?

[stokerwasahack]

That much catnip concentrated in one location would probably give a vampire nosebleeds for a week.

If you're that troubled by the creature, I can come over.

[darkest0knight]

I'm okay. The apartment's warded.

But Lee's out somewhere.

[stokerwasahack]

You have no idea where?

[darkest0knight]

It's a work day. He might be still there.

I can use a spell to locate him, but I...um...I'm already tapped out.