fun stuff
Ok so my life has been kinda crazy lately. Lets see, well I bought a brand new car in august. Its a 2007 Hyundi Accent. It gets amazing gas mileage, 37 miles per gallon. I pay $20 a night to fill it up compared to the gas guzzeling piece of shit tempo I use to drive, which usually would cost me about $60 a night. Lets ee, I have $15000 worth of credit cards now, I'm trying not to be stupid with them but its just so easy!!!! Atleast im paying like $40 over my minumum payment a month. Next I dropped 2 of my 4 classes because I just could not do it with my full time job too. After I droped my classes I was removed from my route. I was so fucking mad!!!! I knew my route could be taken away from me at anytime, but the reason why is what got to me. Some nurses decided they didnt like me and called the pharmacy and told them Lies about me. My company doesnt belive them and either does the pharmacy, but the nursing homw contracts are worth more to them then a loyal driver that does whatever they askes and didnt call in the cops when one of their drivers backed into my brand new car. Oh yeah, my new car is a magnet, I swear to god! I had not even owned the damn thing for 26 hours when one of the drivers in the big white work vans at the pharmacy backed into it, while i was behind it loading totes! I got the hear the whole horrable crunch and pop noises. The driver was super upset, almost crying, I was almost crying too, But i felt worse for him then me. Since that day my car has been hit by a seagull in the middle of the night, it got stuck in my grill and i had to have the janitor at the pharmacy remove it and one of those yard sale signs came flying down the freeway and hit my car right in the windshield. I has been run off the road, almost hit by a semi, and many many other things. It also sucks that i dropped those classes because now that im not working I have plenty of time for school. I was really worried about not being able to pay my car payment among the many many other bills I have. The car payment scared me the most because its not just in my name, my dad co-signed so i could get a better deal on intrest. So it would not just be my perfect credit fucked, but my dad's too. Luckly A1, the courior service i work for, came through. I think i have mede more money just doing odd runs this week then i have in years. The only problem is is that its not steady, so i can never guarntee I will have enough money for my bills. So if anyone knows anywhere hireing part time Please let me know!!!
Ok whats next? I came down with Pneumonia and Bronchitis about a week or two ago. Being a sevear asthmatic that was not a fun time. I basically sat on the couch trying to breath. I could not really talk, I took to much air so if anyone triend to call me in the past few weeks and i didnt answer, thats why. I would like to thank my loving boyfriend and Katie for just being here to watch me and make sure i didnt have to go to the hospital.
Hmmmm, well I went to the laser eye surgen and found out that my contacts were killing my corneas, so no more contacts for me. I'm stuck wearing a very old pair of glasses until november 2nd and 3rd. Thats when I go in for my interlasek surgery. Everyone wish me luck! It would be amazing to wake up in the morning and not be legaly blind! Not have to put eye drops in for my contacts or try to feel around to figure out where I took off my glasses the night before.
So i guess thats about it. I'm sitting here with Martine, one of my very best friends, and we both decided to post LJ's because we have not done it in forever. I love Martine, She is forsure my best friend. Sara is my best friend in the way that i think of her as my sister since we have known eachother since we were two. I am so happy Martine left Bryan. Don't get me wrong, I like him as a friend, but after all the shit he has put her through for years and years and years I hate them together. When he is sweet, he is the sweetiest guy in the world, but i have learned that that does not last for long at all. He kept realing her back, playing games. If he could have actually seen how much pain he put her through, emotionaly and physicaly, he would have done the right thing and stayed away. I hate that I'm saying that because in the beginning they were great! He was one of the nicest guys you could ever meet. But over the years something happened, he changed severly. I kept hoping he would go back to the old bryan, even made excuses and stuck up for him with martine, but it just is not happening :( Oh well, she is SOOOOOOOO much better off now! There is a certain someone who is being a complete sweet heart to her and I think they would be an amazing, drop dead georgous couple. I hope her life starts to right its self. all I want for any of my friends is for them to be happy, and I will do anything in my power to help them get that, and to protect them. They are the most important things in my life. Around this time last year One of my best friends left me when i needed them the most, needed them to tell me to stop, dont be stupid. That was a very dark time in my life, probably the darkest yet. I cant really blam them, they didnt know what else to do. They apoligesed and everything was good again. They didnt really have to apoligise, I understood why they did it, and it was for a good reason, but every once in a while I think back on that time and want to cry. I have never felt so utterly alone. But anyways, that was the past and this is now and im am very happy right now! I am happy with my amazing friends and the positive changes they are making in their lives, I am happy with scott, even though he is not happy. That poor boy suffers from such bad depression and anxity. I try to ge him to take my pills but he refuses, afraid they will run out. I love him, I really do. I dont know if im what he needs though. He needs someone affectionate who actually has a sex drive. I am far from being affectionate, I try but I'm just not a very touchy feely person. I think it comes from being bi-polar. I met someone whos daughter and she was asking me questions about the mental disorder, like why dont we like people touching us? and why when we are in a manic phase do we just have random permiscous sex? I tried to explane it to her but its really hard. Even when your in a manic stage you are a little iffy with people touching you, its just very uncomfortable, you crave touch but when someone gets to close you start to go in a panic attack mode. I really wish I could make him HAPPY happy. Also does anyone have any suggestions on how to bring back your sex drive? I have not had sex since june and even then I had to force myself. I do enjoy sex, and I find my boyfriend very attractive, but for some reason I just don't have one. It is probably all the different medications im on, but I cant stop taking them so i need another alternative.
Ok well my back is starting to hurt from sitting here and typing so much, I just have one last thing to say.....MARTINE I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!
Ok whats next? I came down with Pneumonia and Bronchitis about a week or two ago. Being a sevear asthmatic that was not a fun time. I basically sat on the couch trying to breath. I could not really talk, I took to much air so if anyone triend to call me in the past few weeks and i didnt answer, thats why. I would like to thank my loving boyfriend and Katie for just being here to watch me and make sure i didnt have to go to the hospital.
Hmmmm, well I went to the laser eye surgen and found out that my contacts were killing my corneas, so no more contacts for me. I'm stuck wearing a very old pair of glasses until november 2nd and 3rd. Thats when I go in for my interlasek surgery. Everyone wish me luck! It would be amazing to wake up in the morning and not be legaly blind! Not have to put eye drops in for my contacts or try to feel around to figure out where I took off my glasses the night before.
So i guess thats about it. I'm sitting here with Martine, one of my very best friends, and we both decided to post LJ's because we have not done it in forever. I love Martine, She is forsure my best friend. Sara is my best friend in the way that i think of her as my sister since we have known eachother since we were two. I am so happy Martine left Bryan. Don't get me wrong, I like him as a friend, but after all the shit he has put her through for years and years and years I hate them together. When he is sweet, he is the sweetiest guy in the world, but i have learned that that does not last for long at all. He kept realing her back, playing games. If he could have actually seen how much pain he put her through, emotionaly and physicaly, he would have done the right thing and stayed away. I hate that I'm saying that because in the beginning they were great! He was one of the nicest guys you could ever meet. But over the years something happened, he changed severly. I kept hoping he would go back to the old bryan, even made excuses and stuck up for him with martine, but it just is not happening :( Oh well, she is SOOOOOOOO much better off now! There is a certain someone who is being a complete sweet heart to her and I think they would be an amazing, drop dead georgous couple. I hope her life starts to right its self. all I want for any of my friends is for them to be happy, and I will do anything in my power to help them get that, and to protect them. They are the most important things in my life. Around this time last year One of my best friends left me when i needed them the most, needed them to tell me to stop, dont be stupid. That was a very dark time in my life, probably the darkest yet. I cant really blam them, they didnt know what else to do. They apoligesed and everything was good again. They didnt really have to apoligise, I understood why they did it, and it was for a good reason, but every once in a while I think back on that time and want to cry. I have never felt so utterly alone. But anyways, that was the past and this is now and im am very happy right now! I am happy with my amazing friends and the positive changes they are making in their lives, I am happy with scott, even though he is not happy. That poor boy suffers from such bad depression and anxity. I try to ge him to take my pills but he refuses, afraid they will run out. I love him, I really do. I dont know if im what he needs though. He needs someone affectionate who actually has a sex drive. I am far from being affectionate, I try but I'm just not a very touchy feely person. I think it comes from being bi-polar. I met someone whos daughter and she was asking me questions about the mental disorder, like why dont we like people touching us? and why when we are in a manic phase do we just have random permiscous sex? I tried to explane it to her but its really hard. Even when your in a manic stage you are a little iffy with people touching you, its just very uncomfortable, you crave touch but when someone gets to close you start to go in a panic attack mode. I really wish I could make him HAPPY happy. Also does anyone have any suggestions on how to bring back your sex drive? I have not had sex since june and even then I had to force myself. I do enjoy sex, and I find my boyfriend very attractive, but for some reason I just don't have one. It is probably all the different medications im on, but I cant stop taking them so i need another alternative.
Ok well my back is starting to hurt from sitting here and typing so much, I just have one last thing to say.....MARTINE I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!