A Time to Heal
So I know its been ages. I came back on here today in a moment of clarity, hoping to get a glimpse at something I may have missed, may have forgotten, may have refused to accept. I think I found it. I found a place where we could be ourselves before we were 'ourselves,' before our lives were diluted by outside influence and responsibility and invasive, pervasiveness. Mostly, I came here to find myself and what I left behind. I left behind a writer, an artist. I was consumed by the educational onslaught and the goings-on of everyday life. I want that back. I want to be the person I was and can be.
I'm much more than the sum of my mistakes. Admitting them is paramount of course because it allows us to grow and to begin to gather understanding and appreciation. But it also promotes change - because you cannot begin to evolve without first facing the demons of the past. I am a writer. And I want that back. Looking back over some past entries let me see that skill that I once possessed and I want it back. I was impressive and I want that back too - not this pathetic shell that I've become. I can't stand this emptiness, this lonliness that I have become and I know you were suffering in silence for so long. We are artists and I forgot that - our suffering is our greatest strength and we lend that to each other. I lost my way.
I found this place to be a quiet sanctuary where we can share in our triumphs, our misery and our insecurities. This isn't Facebook. This is our domain. Where we choose who sees what and what we have gained or lost - not looked upon by the all seeing internet masses. Our lives have barred all enough, and we need to maintain a certain level of discretion if we are ever to reach the potential that we have. Please partake in this with me - participate in this micro-revolution and share with me like you used to. This isn't a matter of taking 2 steps back; it's matter of searching the past to find a way forward through the darkness. And I want you there with me, Gwyn.
Let this be ours.
I'm much more than the sum of my mistakes. Admitting them is paramount of course because it allows us to grow and to begin to gather understanding and appreciation. But it also promotes change - because you cannot begin to evolve without first facing the demons of the past. I am a writer. And I want that back. Looking back over some past entries let me see that skill that I once possessed and I want it back. I was impressive and I want that back too - not this pathetic shell that I've become. I can't stand this emptiness, this lonliness that I have become and I know you were suffering in silence for so long. We are artists and I forgot that - our suffering is our greatest strength and we lend that to each other. I lost my way.
I found this place to be a quiet sanctuary where we can share in our triumphs, our misery and our insecurities. This isn't Facebook. This is our domain. Where we choose who sees what and what we have gained or lost - not looked upon by the all seeing internet masses. Our lives have barred all enough, and we need to maintain a certain level of discretion if we are ever to reach the potential that we have. Please partake in this with me - participate in this micro-revolution and share with me like you used to. This isn't a matter of taking 2 steps back; it's matter of searching the past to find a way forward through the darkness. And I want you there with me, Gwyn.
Let this be ours.