Updatalicious, book reviews.
This is the most seat-of-my-pants time of my life! Excepting maybe our Europe trip. But seriously. I found out I got back into Wells, so I'll be going there...I just bought (with Dad's credit card) my plane ticket! It goes straight to Ithaca, which is AWESOME. Totally makes up for having to switch planes twice.
I'm leaving from Oakland (yuck, but I don't have to hang out there, and the airport is...fine), but the flight goes all the way to Ithaca, which means it saves me two hours, hassle, and money. I'm SO excited, I've never flown into Ithaca before.
The seat-of-my-pants part? I don't know where I'm going to be living, what classes I'm going to be taking, ANY of it! And I'm really excited! I mean, it's not like they can put me on the street. Even if I have to have a roommate (which I really don't want to do), it'll only be for a semester. After that, since I have senior standing, I'll be able to pick a single for next semester, EASY. And most of the classes I have this semester are going to be higher-level performing arts courses, which it's pretty easy to get into.
My cold, which has been kicking my ass, is much, much, much better. It's less like I'm sick and more like I feel fine, with more coughing and nose being plugged. Symptoms are lingering, but the virus knows it's beat.
I'm watching Sonora play FFXII (not at the moment, since she has some appointment, but in a general way). Man, I forgot how much I really like this game. Gambits, ILU.
Sadly, she's leaving me tomorrow (BOO L.A.), and instead of moping, I've decided to use that time to A) pack, B) finish my book (the one I'm writing, not the one I'm reading).
Oh! Speaking of reading, I just read two books: Lord John and the Hand of Devils (which is really three novellas, not a book, but I love it anyway) and Inkheart.
REVIEWS OF BOTH BOOKS. SPOILERS ABOUND BECAUSE I CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO TAKE THEM OUT
1.) Lord John and the Hand of Devils
Of course, I LOVE LOVE LOVE Lord John (he's my third favorite character in the series. I know that doesn't sound like much of a commendation, but NO ONE can beat Jamie or Claire, NO ONE. I mean, the fact that he beat out Roger MacKenzie is pretty awesome for him.), which is why I read this with some trepidation. Not because I didn't want to read it, but just because whenever he has a solo adventure (L. J. and the Private Matter, L. J. and the Brotherhood of the Blade), he winds up getting dirty, injured, sleep-deprived, and shaken. Sure enough, NONE of the novellas disappointed in this respect!
a) Lord John and the Hellfire Club
Calloo, Callay, I finally got to find out how George Everett died! For those of you who don't know, the manner of this guy's death was kind of a huge thing in LJATPM, since everyone was supposed to have read this short story already. I don't know how, since it only appeared in an anthology of a magazine which is now something like out of print or whatever, but I had no idea what had happened.
Turns out he was just a run-of-the-mill cultish weirdo, albeit a handsome one who got to sleep with John (I think sometime after Culloden, since before that he was with Hector (and way young), and before Ardsmuir, because during Voyager he was contemplating asking his mother for news of George, and there was some huge scandal. I wonder if we're ever going to find out what it was...or have we? I need to reread all the books). Seriously, WTF George? Bathing John in pig's blood? Trying to frame him not only for being involved in some weird cultish rite, but also for killing a woman after fucking her? Would anyone REALLY have believed that? Weirdo.
The story itself was passable, I think. It ended FAST, and since it was a short story, it didn't have the intrigue I was used to from Lord John's other adventures. But after all, it was a SHORT story, and I got to see some of John after Ardsmuir but before he started visiting Jamie at Helwater.
b) Lord John and the Succubus
You know, even though I read the disclaimer and all that, I really, really thought there would be an actual succubus involved, instead of just Gypsies, stories, and opium. I was excited to see if a) a Saint's penis-in-a-box would keep it away, and b) if John's gayness would have any effect. Sadly, pas de succubus. Although now I do get some of the subtext Stephen Von Namtzen was hinting at in BOTB, and why John was of two minds about talking to him about Percy and the German guy (damn, I need to read that again. I can't remember the name of the guy who was shtupping Percy). I still can't figure out what Stephen's sexuality is--and neither, I think, can John. Guh, he's too much like John. Of course, that's why they're still both alive and out of prison, but it's also why John doesn't get laid very often.
Speaking of which, he totally didn't get laid in this novella. It makes me so SAD for him when he doesn't, even though he finds plenty of opportunities over the course of the novels. Hector, George, some dude at the Lavender Club (who isn't Neil Stapleton, but I think in Haunted Soldier we're given to believe that they might have...), Percy, some servant dude in Drums of Autumn...he's doing all right for himself, I guess. But I'm so weirdly protective of him, I love him so much. I want him to have a lover, like he had with Percy, except 1) not his stepbrother, and 2) not a douchebag who cheats with passing German soldiers. WAY UNCOOL, PERCY. And then asking him to smuggle him out of the FRIGGING TOWER OF LONDON TO SAVE HIS MISERABLE LIFE?? //BOTB rant.
At least let us see some more of the young soldier with the pretty lips. I had high hopes for what's-his-name. Franz? Something German. My, Lord John does love his Germans, doesn't he?
c) Lord John and the Haunted Soldier
Ahhh, THERE'S the political intrigue that makes my head hurt which signifies I'm reading a Lord John novel! Military tribunals, family scandal, something to do with powder mills and sabotaged guns, some dude's head being blown off by a cannonball who MAY OR MAY NOT be Philip Lister (did we ever find out anything about the rammer? Hehe, rammer...I'm a dork). Yep, it's definitely a Lord John novel(la). The highlight of this one for me was John writing letter after letter to Jamie, then burning them. I love you, John. You're a sentimental romantic, but you're also so convinced you're NOT. I would almost believe you, too.
My other favorite part about LJATHS was his conversation with Lister's father, being so taken-aback by the man saying that soldiering was a brutal occupation, and just instantly thinking, "So?" One of the things I love most about John is his integrity, and how he could so easily have been changed to be an immoral man, or a soft, weak man, and he just isn't at all. He's a soldier, and officer, and a gentleman, and he has honor and courage, and never gives them up. It would be so easy for him to abuse his power--and he does, sometimes. Getting Jamie transferred to Helwater may have been better for Jamie, but it was also much better for John, after all. And exerting your influence just so one prisoner you JUST HAPPEN to be in love with doesn't have to be transported to America? Yeah. That's not an abuse of power at aaaaallll.
I really hated Fashanwe, aka Dude With His Head Blown Off. I know I'm supposed to. Way to go, Diana. You succeeded in making yet another truly loathsome character, although he's not nearly in the same league as Black Jack Randall. WTF juggling with grenades, weirdo?? Who tosses a lit grenade at a pleasure garden???
Best line from the book: "Christ, was he really going to die like this, in public, in a pleasure garden in the company of a sodomite spy dressed as a rooster?"
I can't be the only one who wants to see a bit more of Stapleton (aka Neil the Cunt). I can't help it. I'm interested. I hope John's next novel throws them together for a bit of an adventure. Come on, there has to be some good in him! Or...maybe I just really, really want John to get laid. He needs a little pleasure of the flesh! Like I said, he was awake for 48 hours, almost got blown up twice, broken ribs, metal in his chest, half-starving, COME ON. GIVE HIM A BREAK, DIANA.
//end rant on Lord John's welfare.
Anyway. Long story short, I loved them, in ascending order. Hellfire Club < Succubus < Haunted solider.
2.) Inkheart
The weird thing about this book for me was that I already knew it was going to be a movie, but haven't seen it yet (since it's not out yet). Usually I either read the book before I know there's going to be a movie (LotR, HP, HDM) and am partial to the book, or I see the movie then read the book (Gone with the Wind, Eragon) and am partial to one or the other, but can see both sides.
This was a unique experience, since I'd only seen the trailer. And for the first time, as I read it, I found myself envisioning what I wanted the movie to be like, and (SHOCKHORROR) what I wanted them to change. And it looks like they are! I said to myself, "I bet they're going to have Elinor be far more attractive in the movie, and not as fat." Who's playing her? Helen Mirren. Score one for me.
I said, "I bet Silvertongue is going to be a lot less passive." In the book he frequently goes along with whatever Capricorn wants, which did bother me, quite a bit, because I like tall men to be feisty (God, I love tall men. Mmm, tall men. You know, apart from the lesbian thing. If I ever did get with a guy, it would be a TALL MAN. I'd like to blame Diana Gabaldon, but I think it started with Numair Salmalin, in Tamora Pierce. Mmm, tall men. Liam Neeson, Christopher Lee, Brendan Fraser, James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser, Lee Pace...yeah, I loves them all. Oddly enough, I think that's why most of my original characters tend to be rather short...so they can get with tall men. It's the HEIGHT DIFFERENCE that's awesome. And if Liz is reading this, no, it's not an Electra thing, my dad's 5'9". Not tall. Not like yummy tall men. AHEM ANYWAY //drooling). He looks rather un-passive in the trailer, yelling, "YOU'RE GOING BACK IN THAT BOOK" as men drag him away. Score two for me.
I figured they'd make Meggie older than twelve, so Farid isn't a perv for crushing on her (being all of sixteen or so). The actress is going to be sixteen this year. Score three for me. Then again, the kid playing Farid is nineteen, but I'll take what I can get. At least Meggie doesn't look like a little child.
I really hope they have it start a bit more interestingly, with more of a conflict. I really couldn't get into it until about a hundred and fifty pages in--up until then, I was mostly reading it because I already own the sequel, and who wants to waste a book?
Wow, Cornelia Funke must be a massive Bibliophile. If I didn't come from a family of those, and wasn't one myself, I'd almost think that everyone in the book was a nutjob. As it is, I only think Elinor's a nutjob.
It bothers me that she puts quotations from other books before every one of her chapters. It totally gives away what happens in the chapters (A quote about Fahrenheit 451 when there's a book burning later in the chapter? Called it.), and it seems ridiculously self-effacing to me. As if saying, "I couldn't put this as well as THIS author did. Read what he said." And in the beginning dedication, she praises her daughter for putting down Lord of the Rings to read Inkheart. I mean, if you don't think you're a good writer, why should we?
I'm glad that Andy Serkis is playing Capricorn. If anyone can do it, he can. And he's bringing humor to the role ("What's that sticky stuff called?" "Duct tape?" "YES! DucT Tape."), which I think it sorely needs. Capricorn wasn't a vastly interesting character for me in the book, but I think he'll be much better in the movie.
I'm so ambivalent about Dustfinger. I alternately love him and despise him and pity him. I wasn't thrilled to learn that he was in love with Resa...I could do without that plotline. But he's being played by Paul Bettany, so I'll take as much of him as possible, please!
I realize I'm coming down hard on the book, but I really did like it. In fact, I pretty much devoured it, and I'd be reading the sequel now, but I'm writing this review instead, waiting for Sonora to come over. Haha, I think she has to go to the Great Crystal of Giruvegan. *snicker*
Bah. I got distracted, looking stuff up and finding out they're doing another sequel to The Mummy, but with a different Evie and no Ardeth Bey and a 26-year-old Alex and a Chinese Mummy. Oooh, that's going to be bad. But yeah, I'll see it anyway. Apparently it'll be out this summer. Stupid me and that stupid series that I stupid love.
Anyway. Two good books. Read them. I want lunch.
I'm leaving from Oakland (yuck, but I don't have to hang out there, and the airport is...fine), but the flight goes all the way to Ithaca, which means it saves me two hours, hassle, and money. I'm SO excited, I've never flown into Ithaca before.
The seat-of-my-pants part? I don't know where I'm going to be living, what classes I'm going to be taking, ANY of it! And I'm really excited! I mean, it's not like they can put me on the street. Even if I have to have a roommate (which I really don't want to do), it'll only be for a semester. After that, since I have senior standing, I'll be able to pick a single for next semester, EASY. And most of the classes I have this semester are going to be higher-level performing arts courses, which it's pretty easy to get into.
My cold, which has been kicking my ass, is much, much, much better. It's less like I'm sick and more like I feel fine, with more coughing and nose being plugged. Symptoms are lingering, but the virus knows it's beat.
I'm watching Sonora play FFXII (not at the moment, since she has some appointment, but in a general way). Man, I forgot how much I really like this game. Gambits, ILU.
Sadly, she's leaving me tomorrow (BOO L.A.), and instead of moping, I've decided to use that time to A) pack, B) finish my book (the one I'm writing, not the one I'm reading).
Oh! Speaking of reading, I just read two books: Lord John and the Hand of Devils (which is really three novellas, not a book, but I love it anyway) and Inkheart.
REVIEWS OF BOTH BOOKS. SPOILERS ABOUND BECAUSE I CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO TAKE THEM OUT
1.) Lord John and the Hand of Devils
Of course, I LOVE LOVE LOVE Lord John (he's my third favorite character in the series. I know that doesn't sound like much of a commendation, but NO ONE can beat Jamie or Claire, NO ONE. I mean, the fact that he beat out Roger MacKenzie is pretty awesome for him.), which is why I read this with some trepidation. Not because I didn't want to read it, but just because whenever he has a solo adventure (L. J. and the Private Matter, L. J. and the Brotherhood of the Blade), he winds up getting dirty, injured, sleep-deprived, and shaken. Sure enough, NONE of the novellas disappointed in this respect!
a) Lord John and the Hellfire Club
Calloo, Callay, I finally got to find out how George Everett died! For those of you who don't know, the manner of this guy's death was kind of a huge thing in LJATPM, since everyone was supposed to have read this short story already. I don't know how, since it only appeared in an anthology of a magazine which is now something like out of print or whatever, but I had no idea what had happened.
Turns out he was just a run-of-the-mill cultish weirdo, albeit a handsome one who got to sleep with John (I think sometime after Culloden, since before that he was with Hector (and way young), and before Ardsmuir, because during Voyager he was contemplating asking his mother for news of George, and there was some huge scandal. I wonder if we're ever going to find out what it was...or have we? I need to reread all the books). Seriously, WTF George? Bathing John in pig's blood? Trying to frame him not only for being involved in some weird cultish rite, but also for killing a woman after fucking her? Would anyone REALLY have believed that? Weirdo.
The story itself was passable, I think. It ended FAST, and since it was a short story, it didn't have the intrigue I was used to from Lord John's other adventures. But after all, it was a SHORT story, and I got to see some of John after Ardsmuir but before he started visiting Jamie at Helwater.
b) Lord John and the Succubus
You know, even though I read the disclaimer and all that, I really, really thought there would be an actual succubus involved, instead of just Gypsies, stories, and opium. I was excited to see if a) a Saint's penis-in-a-box would keep it away, and b) if John's gayness would have any effect. Sadly, pas de succubus. Although now I do get some of the subtext Stephen Von Namtzen was hinting at in BOTB, and why John was of two minds about talking to him about Percy and the German guy (damn, I need to read that again. I can't remember the name of the guy who was shtupping Percy). I still can't figure out what Stephen's sexuality is--and neither, I think, can John. Guh, he's too much like John. Of course, that's why they're still both alive and out of prison, but it's also why John doesn't get laid very often.
Speaking of which, he totally didn't get laid in this novella. It makes me so SAD for him when he doesn't, even though he finds plenty of opportunities over the course of the novels. Hector, George, some dude at the Lavender Club (who isn't Neil Stapleton, but I think in Haunted Soldier we're given to believe that they might have...), Percy, some servant dude in Drums of Autumn...he's doing all right for himself, I guess. But I'm so weirdly protective of him, I love him so much. I want him to have a lover, like he had with Percy, except 1) not his stepbrother, and 2) not a douchebag who cheats with passing German soldiers. WAY UNCOOL, PERCY. And then asking him to smuggle him out of the FRIGGING TOWER OF LONDON TO SAVE HIS MISERABLE LIFE?? //BOTB rant.
At least let us see some more of the young soldier with the pretty lips. I had high hopes for what's-his-name. Franz? Something German. My, Lord John does love his Germans, doesn't he?
c) Lord John and the Haunted Soldier
Ahhh, THERE'S the political intrigue that makes my head hurt which signifies I'm reading a Lord John novel! Military tribunals, family scandal, something to do with powder mills and sabotaged guns, some dude's head being blown off by a cannonball who MAY OR MAY NOT be Philip Lister (did we ever find out anything about the rammer? Hehe, rammer...I'm a dork). Yep, it's definitely a Lord John novel(la). The highlight of this one for me was John writing letter after letter to Jamie, then burning them. I love you, John. You're a sentimental romantic, but you're also so convinced you're NOT. I would almost believe you, too.
My other favorite part about LJATHS was his conversation with Lister's father, being so taken-aback by the man saying that soldiering was a brutal occupation, and just instantly thinking, "So?" One of the things I love most about John is his integrity, and how he could so easily have been changed to be an immoral man, or a soft, weak man, and he just isn't at all. He's a soldier, and officer, and a gentleman, and he has honor and courage, and never gives them up. It would be so easy for him to abuse his power--and he does, sometimes. Getting Jamie transferred to Helwater may have been better for Jamie, but it was also much better for John, after all. And exerting your influence just so one prisoner you JUST HAPPEN to be in love with doesn't have to be transported to America? Yeah. That's not an abuse of power at aaaaallll.
I really hated Fashanwe, aka Dude With His Head Blown Off. I know I'm supposed to. Way to go, Diana. You succeeded in making yet another truly loathsome character, although he's not nearly in the same league as Black Jack Randall. WTF juggling with grenades, weirdo?? Who tosses a lit grenade at a pleasure garden???
Best line from the book: "Christ, was he really going to die like this, in public, in a pleasure garden in the company of a sodomite spy dressed as a rooster?"
I can't be the only one who wants to see a bit more of Stapleton (aka Neil the Cunt). I can't help it. I'm interested. I hope John's next novel throws them together for a bit of an adventure. Come on, there has to be some good in him! Or...maybe I just really, really want John to get laid. He needs a little pleasure of the flesh! Like I said, he was awake for 48 hours, almost got blown up twice, broken ribs, metal in his chest, half-starving, COME ON. GIVE HIM A BREAK, DIANA.
//end rant on Lord John's welfare.
Anyway. Long story short, I loved them, in ascending order. Hellfire Club < Succubus < Haunted solider.
2.) Inkheart
The weird thing about this book for me was that I already knew it was going to be a movie, but haven't seen it yet (since it's not out yet). Usually I either read the book before I know there's going to be a movie (LotR, HP, HDM) and am partial to the book, or I see the movie then read the book (Gone with the Wind, Eragon) and am partial to one or the other, but can see both sides.
This was a unique experience, since I'd only seen the trailer. And for the first time, as I read it, I found myself envisioning what I wanted the movie to be like, and (SHOCKHORROR) what I wanted them to change. And it looks like they are! I said to myself, "I bet they're going to have Elinor be far more attractive in the movie, and not as fat." Who's playing her? Helen Mirren. Score one for me.
I said, "I bet Silvertongue is going to be a lot less passive." In the book he frequently goes along with whatever Capricorn wants, which did bother me, quite a bit, because I like tall men to be feisty (God, I love tall men. Mmm, tall men. You know, apart from the lesbian thing. If I ever did get with a guy, it would be a TALL MAN. I'd like to blame Diana Gabaldon, but I think it started with Numair Salmalin, in Tamora Pierce. Mmm, tall men. Liam Neeson, Christopher Lee, Brendan Fraser, James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser, Lee Pace...yeah, I loves them all. Oddly enough, I think that's why most of my original characters tend to be rather short...so they can get with tall men. It's the HEIGHT DIFFERENCE that's awesome. And if Liz is reading this, no, it's not an Electra thing, my dad's 5'9". Not tall. Not like yummy tall men. AHEM ANYWAY //drooling). He looks rather un-passive in the trailer, yelling, "YOU'RE GOING BACK IN THAT BOOK" as men drag him away. Score two for me.
I figured they'd make Meggie older than twelve, so Farid isn't a perv for crushing on her (being all of sixteen or so). The actress is going to be sixteen this year. Score three for me. Then again, the kid playing Farid is nineteen, but I'll take what I can get. At least Meggie doesn't look like a little child.
I really hope they have it start a bit more interestingly, with more of a conflict. I really couldn't get into it until about a hundred and fifty pages in--up until then, I was mostly reading it because I already own the sequel, and who wants to waste a book?
Wow, Cornelia Funke must be a massive Bibliophile. If I didn't come from a family of those, and wasn't one myself, I'd almost think that everyone in the book was a nutjob. As it is, I only think Elinor's a nutjob.
It bothers me that she puts quotations from other books before every one of her chapters. It totally gives away what happens in the chapters (A quote about Fahrenheit 451 when there's a book burning later in the chapter? Called it.), and it seems ridiculously self-effacing to me. As if saying, "I couldn't put this as well as THIS author did. Read what he said." And in the beginning dedication, she praises her daughter for putting down Lord of the Rings to read Inkheart. I mean, if you don't think you're a good writer, why should we?
I'm glad that Andy Serkis is playing Capricorn. If anyone can do it, he can. And he's bringing humor to the role ("What's that sticky stuff called?" "Duct tape?" "YES! DucT Tape."), which I think it sorely needs. Capricorn wasn't a vastly interesting character for me in the book, but I think he'll be much better in the movie.
I'm so ambivalent about Dustfinger. I alternately love him and despise him and pity him. I wasn't thrilled to learn that he was in love with Resa...I could do without that plotline. But he's being played by Paul Bettany, so I'll take as much of him as possible, please!
I realize I'm coming down hard on the book, but I really did like it. In fact, I pretty much devoured it, and I'd be reading the sequel now, but I'm writing this review instead, waiting for Sonora to come over. Haha, I think she has to go to the Great Crystal of Giruvegan. *snicker*
Bah. I got distracted, looking stuff up and finding out they're doing another sequel to The Mummy, but with a different Evie and no Ardeth Bey and a 26-year-old Alex and a Chinese Mummy. Oooh, that's going to be bad. But yeah, I'll see it anyway. Apparently it'll be out this summer. Stupid me and that stupid series that I stupid love.
Anyway. Two good books. Read them. I want lunch.