grief
So, I think I found a new level of grief. I've been doing okay since April's death. There was the numbness at first, then the profound pain of loss, sadness, crying, dreams... Four months will be reached start of next week. The past week or so, I have felt just a whole new level of sadness and random tears.
I'm not entirely sure what to do with it. It's like, I did alright getting through the first part. No huge breakdown. There is definitely a hole in my chest.
This morning, April was on my mind and my stupid phone decided to be possessed and reassign the ring I had for April to Crystal.. and sure enough, Crystal returned my call. I jumped near out of my skin.. and tears started flowing. Freaked me the fuck out. I finally took the ringtone off my phone.. and finally took her listing out of my phone as well.
anyways..
that is where I am
I'm not entirely sure what to do with it. It's like, I did alright getting through the first part. No huge breakdown. There is definitely a hole in my chest.
This morning, April was on my mind and my stupid phone decided to be possessed and reassign the ring I had for April to Crystal.. and sure enough, Crystal returned my call. I jumped near out of my skin.. and tears started flowing. Freaked me the fuck out. I finally took the ringtone off my phone.. and finally took her listing out of my phone as well.
anyways..
that is where I am