"Take me on a trip, I'd like to go someday..."
I've done it! I've finally slept in without feeling guilty or behind schedule! A true miracle, in my opinion. Yes, the gorgeous morning sun awoke me at 8 AM, but then I said, "Screw you, beautiful sunlight! I'm still tired!" and went back to sleep until now. I'm stupidly proud of my ability to sleep.
It has been a truly excellent weekend. Saturday was a long day, but a good one. I worked 8-1, then had a few hours at home to just chill and be relaxed before heading into our first night of tech for Johnny A. Cannon II. We'd had rehearsal in the space on Friday, and let me tell you, I cannot believe what a classic storefront theatre the Tin Ceiling is. It's so clearly an old cafe or bakery that has been turned into a cheap, easy, and small performance space. It's just the sort of theatre that starving artists everywhere call home. I love it. It makes me feel like I'm in a movie. Tech went to much better than I could have expected this weekend, both nights. Especially if you take into consideration that last night was the first night that the entire cast was actually assembled in one room at the same time. That won't happen again until our run on Wednesday (heaven help us!) so for things to be as smooth and productive as they were was sort of extraordinary. I'm starting to actually take pride in and enjoy this show, which is so necessary, I've discovered. It's leading me to actually do interesting things and make discoveries onstage, even in a super silly show like this. Acting lessons can really take me by surprise.
After tech ended at about 10:30 Saturday night, I came home and decided that I really wanted to find a dance floor out here. Casey and Amy had gone out swing dancing (I later learned they abandoned that plan and went to watch UFC at Buffalo Wild Wings instead!), so the apartment was empty and I had been aching to do out dancing for months. I decided to head over to the part of town where the three gay bars I know are, all within a block of each other I might add, see who had a decent dance floor going, and have a good time. It turned out Novak's was the place to be, because that place was a big party Saturday night! For whatever reason, my brain was able to shut up and let me have a good time. The other two time I'd been down to Novak's, I'd been terribly self-conscious because I didn't know anyone and was too shy to just invite myself over to talk to anyone else. But Saturday I just didn't care. I saw a dance floor, said, "Sweet!" and jumped right in. Confidence is a funny thing. It can't be faked, no matter how badly you want to fake it. But if you genuinely have it, the difference in the way people look at you and treat you is almost tangible. I was dancing my little heart out without even remotely caring what I looked like or what anyone thought of this strange girl alone on the floor, and I could feel what that confidence did to everyone's perception of me. I wasn't weird, I was intriguing. I wasn't nerdy, I was kind of cool.
This new burst of "dance floor confidence" led to a little dance floor flirtation, even! The Novak's dance floor is on two levels: one on the actual floor, and then a sort of runway along the windows facing the street, which widens out in the corner for a slightly larger trapezoidal-type shape (they build the runway out for the drag show stage). I was down on the lower level doing my thing, and then I caught the eye of this girl up on the runway/trapezoid dancing on her own but with a group of friends. Both of us were just doing our own thing, and I think that was what clicked between us. She'd catch my eye and smile at me, I'd smile back, and then we'd turn away for a little while and then do it again. At some point I thought, "Oh my gosh, I think she's flirting with me! WHAT DO I DO?!" For the record, I'm a terrible flirter. I'm way too self-conscious to be a decent flirt, so when this happened I panicked for a tiny moment. But then I said, "No, don't do that, just make your way over there and see what she does." So now we're dancing right in front of each other, just me on the lower lever and her on the upper. And just when I think she 's not going to do a damn thing, she kneels down and pulls me over to her! So now we are dancing together with her on her knees (HOT!), and I have successfully dance-floor-flirted my way to success! We spent the next half hour on the dance floor together, after I stepped up onto the upper level, which was a little precarious in my heels but I managed. I met her group of friends, we exchanged phone numbers, and now I have a lunch date Wednesday afternoon with the very attractive Kassi! Saturday night was clearly a total success. I'm still not used to anyone seeing me as attractive; it always surprises me, almost to the point where I'm looking around the room going, "Who, me?" I hope this date goes well, even if it ends up being that she and I become friends and I can end up having a circle of gay/lesbian/ally friends in St. Louis. I'd really like that, and if something more becomes of it, then great! I feel like I need to explore options outside of Arielle, because at the very least she and I are going to be on pause for the next year, and not having that kind of relationship in my life is very, very hard for me.
Cut to Sunday, which started off with church, which is always great. I have to remember to e-mail our rector! She and I finally met properly yesterday, and she suggested we go get coffee sometime, which I think would be great. Then a whole lot of lounging around at home, with me cooking pasta and cheesy garlic bread somewhere in there. Then more tech, and when I got home at about 10 last night I had a LOT of energy to burn. Casey and Amy were in their room, and I didn't want to just hang around doing nothing, so I changed clothes, put on my Mary chucks for the first time in ages, grabbed my acting journal, and went for a walk. It was a GORGEOUS walking night, just the right temperature with a perfect little breeze. I strolled around for a while, then stopped at Coffee Cartel to get some alcoholic coffee and write in my acting journal about all my St. Louis discoveries in their outdoor seating. It was so wonderfully urban. Amy called me while I was there to tell me I had inspired her and Casey to take a walk, too! So they strolled by, said hi, and then grabbed me on the way back and we all walked home together. I got a lot written in my acting journal, so much so that I now need to start a new one! I can't believed that one is full! I was using that one all the way back at Timberland and Flickering! Granted, a lot of Flickering and then Tallgrass went into their own notebooks, as did Meisner, but all the acting classes and other projects I've had went into that journal. New city, new journal I guess!
Then we got home and yakked about church and organized religion and sex toy scandals and lots of other things. Amy is such a good conversation partner for me! It's great to have another deep discussion friend at home. I haven't had that since Abby, and Amy is great at it! Then a bit of watch Casey start the next Fire Emblem game (he beat the first one earlier that afternoon!), and then at around 2 I said, "Wow, I'm tired. Go to bed while you can, Danielle!" Thus began a fantastic 8-hour night of sleep. And it was about time, too!
So yes, a great weekend. Today will include Amy's famous rasberry chicked, Casey and I prepping for the audition we both have tonight (I have back to back ones! YIKES!), venturing into the unknown world of YogaBURN with Amy, and a little bit of R&R before getting into the meat of this week. But the weekend was great, and I feel happy and pleased with myself! Good things!
It has been a truly excellent weekend. Saturday was a long day, but a good one. I worked 8-1, then had a few hours at home to just chill and be relaxed before heading into our first night of tech for Johnny A. Cannon II. We'd had rehearsal in the space on Friday, and let me tell you, I cannot believe what a classic storefront theatre the Tin Ceiling is. It's so clearly an old cafe or bakery that has been turned into a cheap, easy, and small performance space. It's just the sort of theatre that starving artists everywhere call home. I love it. It makes me feel like I'm in a movie. Tech went to much better than I could have expected this weekend, both nights. Especially if you take into consideration that last night was the first night that the entire cast was actually assembled in one room at the same time. That won't happen again until our run on Wednesday (heaven help us!) so for things to be as smooth and productive as they were was sort of extraordinary. I'm starting to actually take pride in and enjoy this show, which is so necessary, I've discovered. It's leading me to actually do interesting things and make discoveries onstage, even in a super silly show like this. Acting lessons can really take me by surprise.
After tech ended at about 10:30 Saturday night, I came home and decided that I really wanted to find a dance floor out here. Casey and Amy had gone out swing dancing (I later learned they abandoned that plan and went to watch UFC at Buffalo Wild Wings instead!), so the apartment was empty and I had been aching to do out dancing for months. I decided to head over to the part of town where the three gay bars I know are, all within a block of each other I might add, see who had a decent dance floor going, and have a good time. It turned out Novak's was the place to be, because that place was a big party Saturday night! For whatever reason, my brain was able to shut up and let me have a good time. The other two time I'd been down to Novak's, I'd been terribly self-conscious because I didn't know anyone and was too shy to just invite myself over to talk to anyone else. But Saturday I just didn't care. I saw a dance floor, said, "Sweet!" and jumped right in. Confidence is a funny thing. It can't be faked, no matter how badly you want to fake it. But if you genuinely have it, the difference in the way people look at you and treat you is almost tangible. I was dancing my little heart out without even remotely caring what I looked like or what anyone thought of this strange girl alone on the floor, and I could feel what that confidence did to everyone's perception of me. I wasn't weird, I was intriguing. I wasn't nerdy, I was kind of cool.
This new burst of "dance floor confidence" led to a little dance floor flirtation, even! The Novak's dance floor is on two levels: one on the actual floor, and then a sort of runway along the windows facing the street, which widens out in the corner for a slightly larger trapezoidal-type shape (they build the runway out for the drag show stage). I was down on the lower level doing my thing, and then I caught the eye of this girl up on the runway/trapezoid dancing on her own but with a group of friends. Both of us were just doing our own thing, and I think that was what clicked between us. She'd catch my eye and smile at me, I'd smile back, and then we'd turn away for a little while and then do it again. At some point I thought, "Oh my gosh, I think she's flirting with me! WHAT DO I DO?!" For the record, I'm a terrible flirter. I'm way too self-conscious to be a decent flirt, so when this happened I panicked for a tiny moment. But then I said, "No, don't do that, just make your way over there and see what she does." So now we're dancing right in front of each other, just me on the lower lever and her on the upper. And just when I think she 's not going to do a damn thing, she kneels down and pulls me over to her! So now we are dancing together with her on her knees (HOT!), and I have successfully dance-floor-flirted my way to success! We spent the next half hour on the dance floor together, after I stepped up onto the upper level, which was a little precarious in my heels but I managed. I met her group of friends, we exchanged phone numbers, and now I have a lunch date Wednesday afternoon with the very attractive Kassi! Saturday night was clearly a total success. I'm still not used to anyone seeing me as attractive; it always surprises me, almost to the point where I'm looking around the room going, "Who, me?" I hope this date goes well, even if it ends up being that she and I become friends and I can end up having a circle of gay/lesbian/ally friends in St. Louis. I'd really like that, and if something more becomes of it, then great! I feel like I need to explore options outside of Arielle, because at the very least she and I are going to be on pause for the next year, and not having that kind of relationship in my life is very, very hard for me.
Cut to Sunday, which started off with church, which is always great. I have to remember to e-mail our rector! She and I finally met properly yesterday, and she suggested we go get coffee sometime, which I think would be great. Then a whole lot of lounging around at home, with me cooking pasta and cheesy garlic bread somewhere in there. Then more tech, and when I got home at about 10 last night I had a LOT of energy to burn. Casey and Amy were in their room, and I didn't want to just hang around doing nothing, so I changed clothes, put on my Mary chucks for the first time in ages, grabbed my acting journal, and went for a walk. It was a GORGEOUS walking night, just the right temperature with a perfect little breeze. I strolled around for a while, then stopped at Coffee Cartel to get some alcoholic coffee and write in my acting journal about all my St. Louis discoveries in their outdoor seating. It was so wonderfully urban. Amy called me while I was there to tell me I had inspired her and Casey to take a walk, too! So they strolled by, said hi, and then grabbed me on the way back and we all walked home together. I got a lot written in my acting journal, so much so that I now need to start a new one! I can't believed that one is full! I was using that one all the way back at Timberland and Flickering! Granted, a lot of Flickering and then Tallgrass went into their own notebooks, as did Meisner, but all the acting classes and other projects I've had went into that journal. New city, new journal I guess!
Then we got home and yakked about church and organized religion and sex toy scandals and lots of other things. Amy is such a good conversation partner for me! It's great to have another deep discussion friend at home. I haven't had that since Abby, and Amy is great at it! Then a bit of watch Casey start the next Fire Emblem game (he beat the first one earlier that afternoon!), and then at around 2 I said, "Wow, I'm tired. Go to bed while you can, Danielle!" Thus began a fantastic 8-hour night of sleep. And it was about time, too!
So yes, a great weekend. Today will include Amy's famous rasberry chicked, Casey and I prepping for the audition we both have tonight (I have back to back ones! YIKES!), venturing into the unknown world of YogaBURN with Amy, and a little bit of R&R before getting into the meat of this week. But the weekend was great, and I feel happy and pleased with myself! Good things!