Three Year Bandomversary
So, this is my third year bandom anniversary. It's not the exact day but back in 2009, the Monday after Comiccon I read my first MCR fanfic sitting at the Richard Walker Pancake House in San Diego California and my life started to change. It's the monday after ComicCon and once again, I'm in the Richard Walker Pancake House, taking stock of the year and listening to bandom.
You guys have no idea how big an impact this fandom had on me this year. The friends I made through this fandom held me up through some of the worst times of my life. The MCR and PATD concerts and the music. The music you guys.
In October, I ended up on a locked psychiatric ward for 7 days. One of the rules was no music. However, one of the female CNAs brought her ipod and speaker and she gave it to me for half an hour. I put on I'm Not Okay, Helena, Famous Last Words and Welcome to the Black Parade, curled up in my shitty hospital room and cried with relief at finally, finally finally being able to reach out and have my band to comfort me in the grim silence where people would scream at night and sob during the day.
Knowing that Pete and Mikey both have bipolar helped me push through treatment for the last 9 months of long term treatment. They've been my heroes, reminding me that people like me can lives like that if they try.
When my foster sister killed herself in May, Welcome to the Black Parade and Helena helped me grieve for her, helped me scream and sob until I could think and feel and breathe again.
Through all of this I spent hours and hours on chat or twitter with bandom friends who held me up against the crushing weight of the struggles and fights I've faced this year.
I'm discharging from my treatment center in the next few weeks. I feel mostly whole. It wasnt all bandom but it'd be a fucking lie to say that the music and the people in bandom didnt save my life at least in part.
My life isn't a symptom anymore and I plan to keep running.
Thanks guys. I love you.
You guys have no idea how big an impact this fandom had on me this year. The friends I made through this fandom held me up through some of the worst times of my life. The MCR and PATD concerts and the music. The music you guys.
In October, I ended up on a locked psychiatric ward for 7 days. One of the rules was no music. However, one of the female CNAs brought her ipod and speaker and she gave it to me for half an hour. I put on I'm Not Okay, Helena, Famous Last Words and Welcome to the Black Parade, curled up in my shitty hospital room and cried with relief at finally, finally finally being able to reach out and have my band to comfort me in the grim silence where people would scream at night and sob during the day.
Knowing that Pete and Mikey both have bipolar helped me push through treatment for the last 9 months of long term treatment. They've been my heroes, reminding me that people like me can lives like that if they try.
When my foster sister killed herself in May, Welcome to the Black Parade and Helena helped me grieve for her, helped me scream and sob until I could think and feel and breathe again.
Through all of this I spent hours and hours on chat or twitter with bandom friends who held me up against the crushing weight of the struggles and fights I've faced this year.
I'm discharging from my treatment center in the next few weeks. I feel mostly whole. It wasnt all bandom but it'd be a fucking lie to say that the music and the people in bandom didnt save my life at least in part.
My life isn't a symptom anymore and I plan to keep running.
Thanks guys. I love you.