This is not a moral inventory but I'm trying super fucking hard on the fearless part
I have begun going through my shit today to see what physical items I can sell on top of the fic and podfic services (which will have their own offer and price post later) *scrubs face*
So far, there are lots of posters, lots of shoes, lots of shirts, some vases. I'm trying to find the wherewithal to give up some of my dvds and favorite Clandestine gear among other things but its difficult. Also jewelry, some interesting looking purses(I only have one Designer bag), some novelty items that were exclusive to ComicCon, and the ceramics and drawings I made myself. I'm not hugely talented at either but I made them with my own hands so that has to count for something right?
God. This really sucks. But, by the end of this week there should be a series of sale posts. When those go up, please tell your friends? Anon posting will be on and a lot of the items(for example I have two Abduction poster with Taylor Laughtner's face on them and while he isnt my guy, I know there are fandom people out there in who adore him) are not in my fandom but are going to be available. I'm being very productive in that element. Anyway that's the physical element - watch this space for the proverbial fire sale.
On the psychiatric/psychological side? Oh god this sucks. I'm having mild hurricane fall out flashbacks because this is so close to what I did when we packed up our house. I'm sitting on my bedroom floor again, asking myself Do you really want this? Do you really need this? How will you feel if it's gone forever? Can you deal with that? I don't miss those questions, not even a little and it makes simultaneously sad and relieved to know that often, the answer is yes, I can deal. I just wish I wasn't used to this feeling.
However. I would like to say this before I close: To the people who have said amazing things and already taken me up on my fic/podfic offers or just decided to be fucking amazingly beautifully generous - you are wonderful. You make me feel loved in a way I have never experienced before in my life. As bad as things are - and considering I've gone from three medications to six at twice the dosage to make it through the day they are very fucking bad - I'm grateful that this all happened because it showed me you all, and how gorgeous you are, inside and out, how loving and kind and strong. Nothing I can say will possibly be enough to convey how I feel but this is me trying. *hugs every single one of you* I love you all so very much that it makes me ache a little. Thank you. So much.
So far, there are lots of posters, lots of shoes, lots of shirts, some vases. I'm trying to find the wherewithal to give up some of my dvds and favorite Clandestine gear among other things but its difficult. Also jewelry, some interesting looking purses(I only have one Designer bag), some novelty items that were exclusive to ComicCon, and the ceramics and drawings I made myself. I'm not hugely talented at either but I made them with my own hands so that has to count for something right?
God. This really sucks. But, by the end of this week there should be a series of sale posts. When those go up, please tell your friends? Anon posting will be on and a lot of the items(for example I have two Abduction poster with Taylor Laughtner's face on them and while he isnt my guy, I know there are fandom people out there in who adore him) are not in my fandom but are going to be available. I'm being very productive in that element. Anyway that's the physical element - watch this space for the proverbial fire sale.
On the psychiatric/psychological side? Oh god this sucks. I'm having mild hurricane fall out flashbacks because this is so close to what I did when we packed up our house. I'm sitting on my bedroom floor again, asking myself Do you really want this? Do you really need this? How will you feel if it's gone forever? Can you deal with that? I don't miss those questions, not even a little and it makes simultaneously sad and relieved to know that often, the answer is yes, I can deal. I just wish I wasn't used to this feeling.
However. I would like to say this before I close: To the people who have said amazing things and already taken me up on my fic/podfic offers or just decided to be fucking amazingly beautifully generous - you are wonderful. You make me feel loved in a way I have never experienced before in my life. As bad as things are - and considering I've gone from three medications to six at twice the dosage to make it through the day they are very fucking bad - I'm grateful that this all happened because it showed me you all, and how gorgeous you are, inside and out, how loving and kind and strong. Nothing I can say will possibly be enough to convey how I feel but this is me trying. *hugs every single one of you* I love you all so very much that it makes me ache a little. Thank you. So much.