I can has epic post?
I'm gonna try and get a lot of stuff out right now.
Let me start off with last night. It was horrible. I decided to go to sleep early, and turned the lights off at 1:30. I then proceeded to lie in my bed, looking blankly at my walls, getting more and more desperate for the next hour and a half (The last time I looked at my clock, it was 3AM). I had just gotten off the computer, and just finished watching the vlogs by Cassia, and I was really, really missing people. And because of that, I guess my brain decided to torture me. I had very short periods of sleep, and every single dream I had was just continuing the same story. Which was basically, living through the last day of the Disney trip, and flying home, except this time it was all different, and I spent the entire time knowing that I was going to have to leave them. My head hurt, I actually physically cried at some point, and my cat woke me up at 8:30, wanting to get out of my room. I couldn't fall asleep after that. I was kinda in a daze for a few hours, and got out of bed at 11.
It was so damn miserable. I can't even express how heart wrenching it was to go through that all again. I ache. I told Zephyr on facebook that the only good part of last night was when in my dream, he hugged me. It's true. No one else did, and it was really brief, but for that second in my dream, it was just this kind of Zephyr-shaped blur, wearing a red t-shirt, wrapping me in a little bit of comfort.
I really, really miss it.
As Momma said, the problem with going to the Happiest Place on Earth is that when you get back to real life, you're like, "This really sucks."
So I've been dealing with that mostly, since I got back home 8 days ago. Not to mention that Becca is back in college, and all of my plans with Danny have been failing epicly, and Aja is driving me crazy- I just wish it was easier.
Of course, going to Portland is really gonna help. I really, really wish that Cassia and Zephyr and Blueberry any everyone else could be over there. Because as amazing and epic and right Portland is gonna be, I feel so connected to them, and I want to be near them.
So, basically, moving to Portland is going to be one of the best decisions ever made, and I can't wait, and there's always a bit of me that is eternally giddy about it- but at the same time, I'm freaked out and overwhelmed and just want to watch stupid movies on Comedy Central and snuggle.
Let me start off with last night. It was horrible. I decided to go to sleep early, and turned the lights off at 1:30. I then proceeded to lie in my bed, looking blankly at my walls, getting more and more desperate for the next hour and a half (The last time I looked at my clock, it was 3AM). I had just gotten off the computer, and just finished watching the vlogs by Cassia, and I was really, really missing people. And because of that, I guess my brain decided to torture me. I had very short periods of sleep, and every single dream I had was just continuing the same story. Which was basically, living through the last day of the Disney trip, and flying home, except this time it was all different, and I spent the entire time knowing that I was going to have to leave them. My head hurt, I actually physically cried at some point, and my cat woke me up at 8:30, wanting to get out of my room. I couldn't fall asleep after that. I was kinda in a daze for a few hours, and got out of bed at 11.
It was so damn miserable. I can't even express how heart wrenching it was to go through that all again. I ache. I told Zephyr on facebook that the only good part of last night was when in my dream, he hugged me. It's true. No one else did, and it was really brief, but for that second in my dream, it was just this kind of Zephyr-shaped blur, wearing a red t-shirt, wrapping me in a little bit of comfort.
I really, really miss it.
As Momma said, the problem with going to the Happiest Place on Earth is that when you get back to real life, you're like, "This really sucks."
So I've been dealing with that mostly, since I got back home 8 days ago. Not to mention that Becca is back in college, and all of my plans with Danny have been failing epicly, and Aja is driving me crazy- I just wish it was easier.
Of course, going to Portland is really gonna help. I really, really wish that Cassia and Zephyr and Blueberry any everyone else could be over there. Because as amazing and epic and right Portland is gonna be, I feel so connected to them, and I want to be near them.
So, basically, moving to Portland is going to be one of the best decisions ever made, and I can't wait, and there's always a bit of me that is eternally giddy about it- but at the same time, I'm freaked out and overwhelmed and just want to watch stupid movies on Comedy Central and snuggle.