(no subject)
I remember when I was a little girl we always used to go on whale watches...
I used to love just looking off the side of the boat into the ocean and not know what was down there, down so deep into the ocean that no one knew it existed. It wsa just something I loved doing, staring down. Then when they would annnounce something (a whale, dolphines, ect) I would get soo excited I'de always run to which ever side of thr boat it was on to see it right away... and ofcoarse I'de always get yelled at for running to the railling of the big slippery boat. But when we are that young things like slipping on the boats starboard and falling into the freezing cold ocean doesnt scare you, instead only things we 'heard' about from our kindergarden friends were actually scary to us (Clowns, Closet monsters, knives, ect). I miss those times.
Ever since the Zack thing happened I wish nothing more but to have the fears of a little kid. I'de much rather be scared of the dark then HONESTLY being scared everywhere I go. Now Im paranoid of who is behind me, wonder where he is at every second, and am always looking out the window wondering if hes in jail (and if not is he down the street from me at work?)... I dont know, it's stupid. I dont know how I actually let him continue to get to me and scare me. I dont know. It sucks pretty bad.
I remember laying in bed with him one rainy day during our first month of being together talking about our families (I used to be so scared of his dad), he was explaining to me how he was like the black sheep in his family because for 3 years in a row he had missed both thanksgiving and christmas, THIS year I had him in jail for all of november until the friday before thanksgiving when he made the $5000 bail, and the only reason he will be out of jail for christmas is because the trial was pushed back.
Yea, the trial was definitly pushed back to Jan 4th... and if it gets pushed back any further then guess what... I'm asking the judge request to not attened.... I have fuckin plans and just because this assholes laywer is really trying to get him out of this 2 1/2 years MIN jail time doesnt mean its going to fuck up my plans... no, sorry, hes fucked up my life enough.
I saw AZcks Boss go into the liquor store accross the street from my house befor I sytarted writing this... shit gets me going. sorry, I had to vent. I dont talk about it tooo much (except to siobhan for some reason), but it all just gets built up in my head, all I want to do is hit him back, I want to hoit him just like... i want to do everything to him that he did to me... But I dont know. Its not fair at all... this sucks.
Excuse me sir, why do you suck so bad?!
I used to love just looking off the side of the boat into the ocean and not know what was down there, down so deep into the ocean that no one knew it existed. It wsa just something I loved doing, staring down. Then when they would annnounce something (a whale, dolphines, ect) I would get soo excited I'de always run to which ever side of thr boat it was on to see it right away... and ofcoarse I'de always get yelled at for running to the railling of the big slippery boat. But when we are that young things like slipping on the boats starboard and falling into the freezing cold ocean doesnt scare you, instead only things we 'heard' about from our kindergarden friends were actually scary to us (Clowns, Closet monsters, knives, ect). I miss those times.
Ever since the Zack thing happened I wish nothing more but to have the fears of a little kid. I'de much rather be scared of the dark then HONESTLY being scared everywhere I go. Now Im paranoid of who is behind me, wonder where he is at every second, and am always looking out the window wondering if hes in jail (and if not is he down the street from me at work?)... I dont know, it's stupid. I dont know how I actually let him continue to get to me and scare me. I dont know. It sucks pretty bad.
I remember laying in bed with him one rainy day during our first month of being together talking about our families (I used to be so scared of his dad), he was explaining to me how he was like the black sheep in his family because for 3 years in a row he had missed both thanksgiving and christmas, THIS year I had him in jail for all of november until the friday before thanksgiving when he made the $5000 bail, and the only reason he will be out of jail for christmas is because the trial was pushed back.
Yea, the trial was definitly pushed back to Jan 4th... and if it gets pushed back any further then guess what... I'm asking the judge request to not attened.... I have fuckin plans and just because this assholes laywer is really trying to get him out of this 2 1/2 years MIN jail time doesnt mean its going to fuck up my plans... no, sorry, hes fucked up my life enough.
I saw AZcks Boss go into the liquor store accross the street from my house befor I sytarted writing this... shit gets me going. sorry, I had to vent. I dont talk about it tooo much (except to siobhan for some reason), but it all just gets built up in my head, all I want to do is hit him back, I want to hoit him just like... i want to do everything to him that he did to me... But I dont know. Its not fair at all... this sucks.
Excuse me sir, why do you suck so bad?!