(no subject)
Talib Kweli. Free Show. Emory University. 5pm. Be there. Or be square.
I heard about this last night at Apache. How did I not know this was going on??? HOW?!?!?!?
"It's like one, two, three/
Mos Def and Talib Kweli
We came to rock to the tip top
Best alliance in hip hop
BWAYOOOOH!"
AND.
Today, finally, is the day I explain my previous entry. Drama. Yes, drama. I always thought I'd be drama free cause, well, I'm that typa girl. I don't get into people's business (unless they broadcast it and I just happen to be around at the time), and I have no real "business" for people to get into. Things usually work out perfectly.
WELL.
Fucking Quentin. That's what it's really about. See, he and I made plans last week to have a picnic. You know, it'd be real sweet: me, him, blanket, good food, a book in hand, and sunshine. I spent the night with him last Wednesday; we planned to do the picnic on Thursday. So, I'm leaving his house Thursday morning, and I remember I specifically turned around and said, "Alright, papi (my name for him), I'll see you this afternoon at 2:30." Well...I go to class, (By the way, I made the online magazine, Rampway, staff here at GSU. :) www.rampway.org, if you ever want to see my writings. Ok, no more plugs.), and come home to get things ready. 2:30 rolls around, then 3, then 4, then 5, then 6, then 9, then 10, 11, then 12......................NO WORD FROM THIS NIGGA! NONE! Ne'er a one! So, naturally, Melissa is a little pissed off. Here I went and took the time out to create a fabulous (and I totally mean fabulous) meal, and he fucking stands me up. At various times in the day, I called and sent him text messages, but to no avail. I was thinking, "FINE!, fuck you too!"
So, how about this motherfucker calls me at 12:30am talking about some, "Hey, I just checked my messages...." And I wasn't into hearing it right then. I was like, "Where. the. fuck. were. you? How dare you fucking stand me up, you little fuck? Do you know what I've been doing for the past few hours? Worrying about your stupid ass! Worrying about some fuck who obviously doesn't have any kind of regard for my feelings...." And then he broke in, and was like, "Well..I didn't feel like I would have been any kind of good company today.....I just had some issues to take care of by myself." And then I said, "Well, are your goddamned fingers broken? ARE THEY? YOU COULDN'T HAVE PICKED UP THE FUCKING PHONE TO CALL ME AND SAY, 'hey, melissa, i'm not going to be able to make it today...' SHIT, DAMMIT, I WOULDA BEEN HAPPY WITH THAT! BUT YOU LET ME WORRY AND I WAS JUST OVER AT MY FRIEND'S DORM CRYING CAUSE I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAPPENED TO YOU...YOU'RE LUCKY I LIKE YOU QUENTIN! CAUSE, AT THIS POINT, I DON'T EVEN FEEL LIKE GIVING YOU A CHANCE! YOU FUCKED WITH ME ONCE, DON'T LET THIS SHIT HAPPEN AGAIN. (and then to quote something from Jay-Z...) I'M SO SINCERE! I REALLY AM." And he was all, "I'm really sorry.....I know I shoulda called......how can I make it up to you?" And I was like, "Don't say you're sorry anymore. And there really isn't anything you can do. You hurt me, now let's move on, you fuck." And he was like, "Okay....." then there was this looooooooooooooooooooooooooooong silence.
UGH. It makes me so angry to think about that. SO ANGRY. I mean, shit, I know we all have our problems and whatnot...but, goddammit, have enough decency to call people when you don't mean to show the fuck up! FUCK HIM! FUCK HIM! So, anyway, Friday rolls around and his ass calls me up talking bout some, "Hey, baby, Inf (Infinite, his buddy) is back from Amsterdam and I'm gonna cook..you wanna come?" I said, "Yeah, sure.." I went downstairs to meet them, and when I got to the turnaround area, Quentin had his arms open to hug me, and I just said a brisk, "Hey", and then got in the backseat. So, we arrive at Inf's and then they start to cook, well, mostly Quentin. Inf leaves to go get his "life-partner" Pai, and Quentin comes out with the food. How about it's almost the SAME shit we were supposed to have the day before on our picnic. He handed me the food, and...we ate in silence. But, lawd, let me tell you! That food was so damned good. I wanted to tell him so, but pride kept my mouth shut. Fucker.
That entire situation had better not happen again. Ever. Cause I will be quick to drop that boy...Really, I will. I don't have time for games. I've played way too many in the past, and I'm not gonna continue it.
Well, Saturday rolls around and nothing really happens for most of the day..I don't think. I don't really remember. But, that night, we were all in Nneka's room watching movies and such. Sharod was there, too. We watched Kids; that movie is really fucked up, but interesting. I mean, I can see, now, why it's an indie favorite. Best quote in the entire movie: "I Have No Legs!," said by the legless man on a skateboard while he clanged a cup with pennies and shit in it. After the movie was over, everyone disspersed and Sharod and I came back here. We laughed and talked, and I was mostly waiting for his damn high to come down so he could leave. Quentin called me while he was here, and I talked to him. I didn't tell Quentin that Sharod was here, I didn't feel I had to. I was still mad. When I got off the phone with him, Sharod was like, "Was that him?" and I said, "Uh..yeah, I guess so." And then Sharod just had this...this..look of...of...I don't know what on his face. He left shortly thereafter, but not before trying to put me in a chokehold and shit. We always did like to wrassle ("wrestle" if you live anywhere else. This is the South, people.).
The whole situation between the mens was worked out. And if it wasn't, fuck them. I'm tired of catering to all their needs and always thinking about their feelings. Fuck that. I'm gonna stop doing that so much. Always putting the strain on myself. If a dude can't handle what I'm doing or who I'm seeing, then fuck him.
So..now, here I am. I should be in class, but...eh. Why? Apache was aight last night, and we stayed out hella long. But..word. I'm getting into the shower now.
I heard about this last night at Apache. How did I not know this was going on??? HOW?!?!?!?
"It's like one, two, three/
Mos Def and Talib Kweli
We came to rock to the tip top
Best alliance in hip hop
BWAYOOOOH!"
AND.
Today, finally, is the day I explain my previous entry. Drama. Yes, drama. I always thought I'd be drama free cause, well, I'm that typa girl. I don't get into people's business (unless they broadcast it and I just happen to be around at the time), and I have no real "business" for people to get into. Things usually work out perfectly.
WELL.
Fucking Quentin. That's what it's really about. See, he and I made plans last week to have a picnic. You know, it'd be real sweet: me, him, blanket, good food, a book in hand, and sunshine. I spent the night with him last Wednesday; we planned to do the picnic on Thursday. So, I'm leaving his house Thursday morning, and I remember I specifically turned around and said, "Alright, papi (my name for him), I'll see you this afternoon at 2:30." Well...I go to class, (By the way, I made the online magazine, Rampway, staff here at GSU. :) www.rampway.org, if you ever want to see my writings. Ok, no more plugs.), and come home to get things ready. 2:30 rolls around, then 3, then 4, then 5, then 6, then 9, then 10, 11, then 12......................NO WORD FROM THIS NIGGA! NONE! Ne'er a one! So, naturally, Melissa is a little pissed off. Here I went and took the time out to create a fabulous (and I totally mean fabulous) meal, and he fucking stands me up. At various times in the day, I called and sent him text messages, but to no avail. I was thinking, "FINE!, fuck you too!"
So, how about this motherfucker calls me at 12:30am talking about some, "Hey, I just checked my messages...." And I wasn't into hearing it right then. I was like, "Where. the. fuck. were. you? How dare you fucking stand me up, you little fuck? Do you know what I've been doing for the past few hours? Worrying about your stupid ass! Worrying about some fuck who obviously doesn't have any kind of regard for my feelings...." And then he broke in, and was like, "Well..I didn't feel like I would have been any kind of good company today.....I just had some issues to take care of by myself." And then I said, "Well, are your goddamned fingers broken? ARE THEY? YOU COULDN'T HAVE PICKED UP THE FUCKING PHONE TO CALL ME AND SAY, 'hey, melissa, i'm not going to be able to make it today...' SHIT, DAMMIT, I WOULDA BEEN HAPPY WITH THAT! BUT YOU LET ME WORRY AND I WAS JUST OVER AT MY FRIEND'S DORM CRYING CAUSE I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAPPENED TO YOU...YOU'RE LUCKY I LIKE YOU QUENTIN! CAUSE, AT THIS POINT, I DON'T EVEN FEEL LIKE GIVING YOU A CHANCE! YOU FUCKED WITH ME ONCE, DON'T LET THIS SHIT HAPPEN AGAIN. (and then to quote something from Jay-Z...) I'M SO SINCERE! I REALLY AM." And he was all, "I'm really sorry.....I know I shoulda called......how can I make it up to you?" And I was like, "Don't say you're sorry anymore. And there really isn't anything you can do. You hurt me, now let's move on, you fuck." And he was like, "Okay....." then there was this looooooooooooooooooooooooooooong silence.
UGH. It makes me so angry to think about that. SO ANGRY. I mean, shit, I know we all have our problems and whatnot...but, goddammit, have enough decency to call people when you don't mean to show the fuck up! FUCK HIM! FUCK HIM! So, anyway, Friday rolls around and his ass calls me up talking bout some, "Hey, baby, Inf (Infinite, his buddy) is back from Amsterdam and I'm gonna cook..you wanna come?" I said, "Yeah, sure.." I went downstairs to meet them, and when I got to the turnaround area, Quentin had his arms open to hug me, and I just said a brisk, "Hey", and then got in the backseat. So, we arrive at Inf's and then they start to cook, well, mostly Quentin. Inf leaves to go get his "life-partner" Pai, and Quentin comes out with the food. How about it's almost the SAME shit we were supposed to have the day before on our picnic. He handed me the food, and...we ate in silence. But, lawd, let me tell you! That food was so damned good. I wanted to tell him so, but pride kept my mouth shut. Fucker.
That entire situation had better not happen again. Ever. Cause I will be quick to drop that boy...Really, I will. I don't have time for games. I've played way too many in the past, and I'm not gonna continue it.
Well, Saturday rolls around and nothing really happens for most of the day..I don't think. I don't really remember. But, that night, we were all in Nneka's room watching movies and such. Sharod was there, too. We watched Kids; that movie is really fucked up, but interesting. I mean, I can see, now, why it's an indie favorite. Best quote in the entire movie: "I Have No Legs!," said by the legless man on a skateboard while he clanged a cup with pennies and shit in it. After the movie was over, everyone disspersed and Sharod and I came back here. We laughed and talked, and I was mostly waiting for his damn high to come down so he could leave. Quentin called me while he was here, and I talked to him. I didn't tell Quentin that Sharod was here, I didn't feel I had to. I was still mad. When I got off the phone with him, Sharod was like, "Was that him?" and I said, "Uh..yeah, I guess so." And then Sharod just had this...this..look of...of...I don't know what on his face. He left shortly thereafter, but not before trying to put me in a chokehold and shit. We always did like to wrassle ("wrestle" if you live anywhere else. This is the South, people.).
The whole situation between the mens was worked out. And if it wasn't, fuck them. I'm tired of catering to all their needs and always thinking about their feelings. Fuck that. I'm gonna stop doing that so much. Always putting the strain on myself. If a dude can't handle what I'm doing or who I'm seeing, then fuck him.
So..now, here I am. I should be in class, but...eh. Why? Apache was aight last night, and we stayed out hella long. But..word. I'm getting into the shower now.