service
I went out in service all day today. It was good. Sometimes I feel like such a hypocrite because I'm a "pioneer" and I know everyone kind of looks up to me for that. If they only knew all the times I make excuses and don't do the right thing, and all the times I chicken out and say nothing. I'm a pioneer but sometimes I don't have the pioneer spirit. I don't take advantage of situations that I know I could be talking about Jehovah. Man, I'm smooth at the door, but actually talking to somebody in a day to day situation, forget about it. I'm seriously thinking of going off the list but still doing the hours. I know I can make the time but all the hoopla surrounding pioneering really gets on my nerves. There is absolutely no difference between me and the person who goes out in service for 2 hours a month. Why should I get the good treatment. I don't want it. I want to be treated just like everyone else.