nehow
I'm going to learn Chinese! The only word I know is nehow which is hello phonetically. The classes start in January. I'm very excited about it. I have been seriously considering learning a foreign language, but Bosnian was my choice. Then I heard about Chinese and I got to thinking. . . I don't necessarily want to stay in Saint Louis. I'm really looking to expand my horizons. Saint Louis has the biggest Bosnian population in the US, so if I commit to Bosnian that means I'm kind of committing myself to Saint Louis for a long time. But Chinese are everywhere, and as of yet there isn't even a Chinese group in Saint Louis, although that is the ultimate goal. So that boils down to: learning Chinese is not going to keep me here in this midwestern fishbowl. I can go anywhere! Which is what I want. Next August is the etd.
On a different subject, I've been trying to compile my poems that could make good songs, and actually add some music to them. And I realized how depressed and sad I must seem to the people who have read them. And I have to say that I write poetry to relieve tension, stress, and yes, depression and sadness. But that's not the way I feel all the time. I am sad on a regular basis but it is not as all consuming as it once was. Overall, I can't say that I'm happy -- I honestly think that happiness is impossible in a complete way in this system (the WT study this past Sunday was very encouraging though. I realized some things I need to work on). But I can't say that I'm sad or depressed either. I have moments of both to make an overall "I'm OK" or "I'm fine." That's just a word of consolation to those who have expressed loving concern.
On a different subject, I've been trying to compile my poems that could make good songs, and actually add some music to them. And I realized how depressed and sad I must seem to the people who have read them. And I have to say that I write poetry to relieve tension, stress, and yes, depression and sadness. But that's not the way I feel all the time. I am sad on a regular basis but it is not as all consuming as it once was. Overall, I can't say that I'm happy -- I honestly think that happiness is impossible in a complete way in this system (the WT study this past Sunday was very encouraging though. I realized some things I need to work on). But I can't say that I'm sad or depressed either. I have moments of both to make an overall "I'm OK" or "I'm fine." That's just a word of consolation to those who have expressed loving concern.