Flinging Poo
A friend asked me where the monkey theme for my blog came from. The answer is two pronged.
#1, I'm atheist. I projectile vomit on creation superstition accepting the science of evolution as gospel. Charles Darwin is a hero, not for his logic and evolutionary thinking, but for his challenge of conventional non-wisdom. In the mid-19th century when he considered evolution over creation he knew what he was up against. For centuries men of science were vilified, ostracized, even threatened by the non-thinking religious establishment. I place Darwin right up there with Galileo. I have a Darwin fish on my Jeep.
#2, My monkey love also comes from the workplace where hard working blue collar people are often looked down upon as trained monkeys. I've heard the term "monkey work" used many times by suited baboons who believe they're above other working primates. I don't care to delve further into this chip I carry on my simian shoulder. I call my workplace Monkeytech because we embrace our monkey moniker.
Many years ago at the Roger Williams Park Zoo in Providence, I witnessed a mischievous monkey reach around to scoop poop from his crack and pitch it across his 'natural habitat' created by suited primates. He was aiming at another lemur but missed. The manure missile struck the cage splattering all over a lady standing too close. It was laugh out loud hilarious to everyone but one mortified woman. Who hasn't wished they could throw stool in the eye of an antagonist? This is where evolution has fucked us. We're too advanced, proper and polite to hurl feculence.
It was just one more reason to love monkeys. They have no rules.
In this hectic period at Monkeytech nerves are frayed. I've worked the graveyard shift for two weeks running around like a crazy chimp trying to get work done. A few times I've come in at 7pm to find projects sitting idle during the day shift. I said nothing at first but after a few especially busy nights, and less productive days, I finally reached around to fling poo at my fellow apes.
I first did some homework to make certain I wasn't unjustly tossing turds. I then sent Hermanos a late night email basically asking, "What the fuck?" I think he's slacking off on days leaving me overbooked at night. I then braced myself for the retaliatory shit that was bound to come flying my way. My safety goggles were on.
.....to be continued.