Missing scene - (House vs God)
Title: Missing scene - House vs God
By:
daasgrrl
Rating: PG for language
Pairing: House/Wilson implied
Disclaimer: Not David Shore
Summary: Boyd makes a detour to Wilson's office
Notes: Just a little snippet that wouldn't go away after the episode last night.
There was a tap at the door, and Wilson looked up from his papers.
“Doctor Wilson?”
“Boyd.”
Wilson managed a small smile in greeting, and his voice was carefully neutral. It was pointless to continue being annoyed - Boyd was still just a kid, after all, and had been hallucinating into the bargain, but the stunt he had pulled on Grace still rankled. Wilson stood up, and gestured him to his office couch, but Boyd remained standing, his sweater clasped in front of him, smiling his gentle smile.
“They’re letting me go now. I just thought I’d come and say goodbye. How’s Grace?”
“She’s… doing well, for now. She’s going to take the trip to Italy. I’m sure she talked to you about that.”
“Yes. Well, if I don’t hear from her…”
“I’ll tell her you said goodbye.”
Boyd nodded, and put one hand on the door, but turned back at the last moment. His voice was earnest, almost pleading.
“Doctor Wilson, do you believe what happened was a small miracle, or just a giant coincidence? That I should get sick with exactly the right type of virus, come here, and of all the patients in the hospital, I found her, and touched her?”
It was a question Wilson had been unable to avoid asking himself after recent events, but had gotten nowhere with. Boyd’s steady gaze forced him to honesty.
“I… don’t really know. I think… sometimes, some things, there’s not a lot of difference. Miracle, coincidence. Whatever you want to call it. Either way, a dying woman gets to see Florence.”
Boyd smiled at that. “I bet Doctor House wouldn’t see it that way.”
“Doctor House… finds it impossible to believe that anything could potentially be out of his comprehension or his control. He thinks if there is a God, he’s the closest thing to it.”
They shared a brief look of amused understanding, and then Boyd shifted a little, looking uncomfortable.
“Grace told me about you. And her.”
“Yeah, I figured…”
“And how you felt about the poker game.”
“That was a mistake. In more ways than one.” Wilson grimaced at the memory of the evening. “If you hadn’t said that to House…”
“And you know, that’s all Doctor House wants to see. He thinks I just look at people, talk to them, and figure out stuff based on what I see and hear. That doesn’t necessarily mean God doesn’t talk to me. Maybe I see things, hear things, and He tells me what they mean. Just because something is possible, doesn’t mean that it’s the only explanation. I wish he could understand that.”
“Yes, well, good luck with convincing him.” Wilson smiled a little, but sobered instantly at Boyd’s next words.
“You know that you’re not meant to be with her.”
“I’m sorry, but that’s really… none of your business.”
“You’re meant to be with him. You love him. Running from it won’t solve any of your problems.”
Boyd’s gaze was intense, hypnotizing. There was no need for him to explain. Wilson knew exactly who and what he meant, and the knowledge chilled him, even as he struggled to remain calm and rational.
“Really. And did you come up with this interesting - theory - through observation, or did God tell you?”
“Does it matter?” Boyd’s voice was insufferably gentle. “It‘s true.”
“You have no idea about…”
“Yes, I do. You won’t go back to him, because you’re scared. Scared that it might be everything you’ve ever wanted, scared that it won’t be. You won’t risk it. You’d rather go on living the way you understand, the way that’s safe. But it’s a mistake. If you just had some faith… in him, in yourself… you would both be more at peace.”
Wilson could only stand and stare at him, numbly. Surely Boyd wouldn’t… he wouldn’t…
“And are you going to… what are you going to say to him?”
“Nothing. Because he won’t believe me, no matter what I say. He only believes in luck, in chance, in coincidences. In human nature. But that’s OK. He is just… the way God intended him to be. But you… you hide from yourself. From Him.”
The conviction in his eyes was terrifying. Wilson found himself at a complete loss for words, but Boyd merely accepted his silence with a shrug and turned away.
“I know, I know, it’s none of my business. I’m sorry. Bye, Doctor Wilson. Tell Grace to remember that God is with her. Always. And with you, even if you don’t believe.”
When Wilson finally gathered himself enough to think about it, the conclusion was inescapable, of course. He knew enough about the Bible to know that same-sex relationships didn’t exactly make the “approved” list, and therefore the message must have been from Boyd, and Boyd alone, for whatever unfathomable reason might have possessed him at the time. And as much as he might want to believe, there was no way on earth he was going to risk his existing friendship with House, fucked up as it was, over the ravings of a 15-year-old, no matter how much of a divine connection he might claim. He could wish for things to be different as much as he wanted, but when it came down to it, miracles were for other people, and not for him.
Wilson sat at his desk and stared at his paperwork for the short remainder of the afternoon, but could make no sense of it at all.