OOC: This features AU!Leoben and is written with the lovely number_eight, taking place in the Earth!AU verse.Mornings in his household were somewhat chaotic
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Sharon had told Helo that there was some work that needed to be done with the Twos, which wasn't an outright lie for what she was going to do. She was going to see Leoben, the particular Two that was living with both Sam and Kara, after the dinner that had gone surprisingly well despite Lee's looks at her during the meal and her own confession to Kara beforehand.
It was the reason she was knocking on the front door.
"Hello? It's Sharon Agathon," she said, pushing the door open and looking around. She'd figured that the other two were gone by now, and it would be the best time to talk to Leoben alone. Maybe her only time.
"Leoben? Kara told me I should talk to you if you're not too busy... wait, are you doing dishes?"
She stopped once she got to the kitchen and blinked. Never in a million years would she have pictured this scene. "I didn't mean to bother you..."
"I am doing the dishes, yes," Leoben said, drying a plate a with a towel and putting it in the crate they used to house their (metal, military issue) dishes. He raised a brow at his sister Cylon. "If I left it up to Sam and Kara, we'd never have any clean ones."
He finished and put the towel on the counter, giving her his customary calm, serene look. "You're not bothering me. It's nice to see you," he said simply, speaking truthfully. He didn't bother to ask why Kara had wanted her to talk to him--Leoben figured she would get to that in her time. "Do you want something to drink? We have some coffee."
She nodded, a little smile in place as she watched him finish up. "Coffee, yes, thanks. That sounds great." She shrugged out of her jacket and sat down, toying with her hair which was wrapped up in her typical ponytail. But, she was a civilian right now.
The ponytail came down.
"So, I don't know exactly how much you heard that other day, or if Kara told you anything about our little talk, but... well, I'm here to see you and, actually, get some advice."
Leoben poured her some coffee, pushing the mug across the counter. "We have a little bit of sugar, but no milk. We weren't approved on the milk rations after it was discovered our household of three did not actually contain a child."
Leoben rested his palms on the counter and cocked his head thoughtfully. "Kara didn't really say anything," he answered honestly. "I asked if you were all right, and she told me to stop being a nosy bastard, I think was the phrase she used." He smiled slightly. "And I think Cavil would die if he actually heard someone asking me for advice. You know he always thought I was crazy."
"Black's fine." Sharon had actually gotten used to far worse coffee while on Galactica, which was part of the reason she'd switched to tea. The other part, of course, was that it had been supplied to her by Admiral Adama during her incarceration while most of the crew was on new Caprica. Still, the coffee was good and helped her through what she had to say next.
"Cavil thought anyone who disagreed with him was crazy," she murmured before placing the cup down and clasping her hands. "Leoben. I'm having an affair." Might as well get right to the point, right? "With Lee Adama. And... it's been going on for quite some time. Dualla doesn't know, Karl doesn't know... I only told Kara the other night."
She rested her head in her hands, not wanting to see what look Leoben would give her for the confession.
Leoben blinked, only surprised that Kara had managed to keep that quiet. Then again, perhaps he was misjudging her. Or maybe she'd told Sam and not him. He focused on his sister Cylon and thought about what she said, turning it over in his mind, looking for patterns.
"Do you love him?" he asked curiously, though hadn't Caprica proved that you didn't need love to conceive, even though she seemed somewhat enamored of Tigh? "Or is this only about sex?" he asked, somewhat bluntly. "I hope that wasn't offensive, sister, I'm just curious."
She looked up at the question and answered easily, "No." Sharon shut her eyes again, because that was the worst part of it.
"I understand Leoben," she still had to call him by name and not 'brother' because Sharon hadn't adapted that well just yet, "and I'm not offended. It's just that... I don't love him. He doesn't love me. But this has been going on for a long time and we can't seem to stop. It's like some kind of addiction, and even though we did manage to stop once, we picked up where we left off not too shortly after that."
"When we were trying to see if we could create life, many of us had sex without love." Leoben quirked a brow at her. "Sometimes we had sex just to see what it was like, to learn." Or, as it were, to help the Sixes master their charms of seduction. "So sex without love is not unknown to us, as a race."
Leoben was quiet for a moment. "We're becoming...not human, of course, but something else. I don't even know the last time anyone called me Two. I sign things with a name I chose from nothing. We live with humans--you have born a child," he said, with a touch of reverence in his voice. "Perhaps it would have seemed strange to us, that maybe we would seek...what you have sought," he said delicately, seeking to be respectful. "But I think it is because we are evolving into something greater than we were before
( ... )
"But my mission was to make Karl fall in love with me, not have sex. And it worked. He fell in love with me, but I fell right back and I don't regret it. I know I was considered a traitor to the race, but then the other Eights," which was hard for her to admit, "looked up to me as some sort of leader for doing that." Helo had even told her about the one model who had accessed all of her memories and 'fell in love' with Sharon's husband.
"I want to stop, and I don't." It was still odd to think of it that way. "I've hurt him, he's hurt me, and somehow it makes it better that way. Less... complicated. We're both married to people who love us and are the 'safe' choice, so maybe we had to seek out other... venues?" Sharon hung her head again. At least Leoben wasn't judging her.
Leoben laughed before he could help himself. "I'm sorry. I'm not laughing at you, I promise. It's just that I know that story very well. That's probably why Kara told you to talk to me." Leoben took a sip of his own coffee, which was mostly cold by now. "That's what I am, for her. The choice that isn't safe. She needs that. Maybe you do, too."
"And of course you were a role model for them--pardon the pun," he said dryly. "You exhibited independence. And see how the rest of us followed suit."
She raised her head and was ready to say something until he explained himself. Somewhat. "I... I don't get it," she said with a frown. A story he knew well? Sure, she knew what Kara had told her, but...
"Oh," she sighed, "I get it. And don't take this the wrong way because I love Kara, but I don't want to be like her. I don't want to need that."
She shook her head and stood, pacing. "I'm not a role model for anyone. Just because I'm the liaison, it doesn't mean I'm any better or worse than any other Cylon." Not that she really believed that.
"I don't think Kara wants to be her, half the time," Leoben said, shrugging. "But the thing is, Sharon--this is weird, what we're doing, but it's working. Kara finally admitted what she wanted, needed, and..." he spread his hands, indicating himself, the house. "Things are better than they were before."
He watched her pace and quirked a smile at her words. "You don't have to pretend with me," he said, amused. "I will fully admit you are much better company than some of our other brethren." Leoben fell quiet for a moment, and his voice, when he spoke again, was soft.
"Have you seen the mural Kara painted in my bedroom? It's two stars in the darkness of space, a comet in the distance. It's supposed to be us--. Sam, for Kara, is Earth. Stability. Safety. Helo is that for you, the sun, rising bright and setting in darkness. What is Apollo, then, sister, if Helo is that which is always constant?"
She half-laughed. "Well, Apollo is the god of sun according to the humans, right?" And Helo was another form of sun, so the metaphor didn't really work for her even though Sharon knew she was ignoring what Leoben was trying to tell her.
"I don't know," she admitted. "He's... unpredictable, but reliable in that unpredictability, if that makes sense." There was no way she thought she could have what Kara did, though. She had a daughter that wouldn't understand it. She had a very possessive husband who loved her and would beat the crap out of Lee once he found out -- Sharon remembered that night at the Dance when Karl had gotten the better of Lee.
"This is frakked up," she mumbled. "I don't know how you can do it, Leoben."
"Yes. Of course, their gods are not ours. Maybe that is what this is, for you. Cylon and human, because we cannot pretend we are not fashioned in their image." Leoben's mouth twisted for a moment into an ironic smile.
"What do you mean?" he asked her curiously. "How I put up with Kara? That is, of course, a very good question. She's very...well. You know. " He waved a hand, though his voice was affectionate in a way it often wasn't around Kara herself.
"If you mean, how I do we do this, with the three of us?" He laughed. "Sometimes it's hard. But you see, I don't mind that Kara loves Sam. Love is infinite. And there is some balance between the three of us that makes this work where Kara and Sam, or Kara and I, would not." He gave Sharon a wry smile. "Sam might have a different answer. But he might not. I think even he realizes this is necessary, even if he doesn't like admitting it at times."
Cylon and human? Sharon eyed him carefully. Leoben had always talked in riddles, it seemed, so she was trying to understand him, but he wasn't making it easy.
"No, no, not Kara. How you can put up with Sam and Kara who are obviously in love." Although he was right; sometimes Kara made loving her a hard thing. How many female friends did Kara have, anyway?
"Oh, that's..." Odd, she thought to herself. "Great," she said aloud. It still didn't help her at the moment, though. She was supposed to be reliable, caring, the opposite of Kara. Sharon didn't frak around, so when people heard some scuttlebutt that Kara had, no one had been surprised.
"What if it's not love, though?" It was her last question, because it was really the only question that mattered.
"Why should it bother me that Sam and Kara are in love?" Leoben asked her, his gaze sharp. "They are better together than they are apart. I would no more get between them than I would try and stop the sun from setting." Leoben raised a brow. "I know Kara loves me," he said quietly. "But it's not the same kind of love."
"What if you don't love Lee Adama? Sharon, why would you be willing to give up everything you have that makes you happy, if it isn't?"
It was the reason she was knocking on the front door.
"Hello? It's Sharon Agathon," she said, pushing the door open and looking around. She'd figured that the other two were gone by now, and it would be the best time to talk to Leoben alone. Maybe her only time.
"Leoben? Kara told me I should talk to you if you're not too busy... wait, are you doing dishes?"
She stopped once she got to the kitchen and blinked. Never in a million years would she have pictured this scene. "I didn't mean to bother you..."
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He finished and put the towel on the counter, giving her his customary calm, serene look. "You're not bothering me. It's nice to see you," he said simply, speaking truthfully. He didn't bother to ask why Kara had wanted her to talk to him--Leoben figured she would get to that in her time. "Do you want something to drink? We have some coffee."
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The ponytail came down.
"So, I don't know exactly how much you heard that other day, or if Kara told you anything about our little talk, but... well, I'm here to see you and, actually, get some advice."
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Leoben rested his palms on the counter and cocked his head thoughtfully. "Kara didn't really say anything," he answered honestly. "I asked if you were all right, and she told me to stop being a nosy bastard, I think was the phrase she used." He smiled slightly. "And I think Cavil would die if he actually heard someone asking me for advice. You know he always thought I was crazy."
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"Cavil thought anyone who disagreed with him was crazy," she murmured before placing the cup down and clasping her hands. "Leoben. I'm having an affair." Might as well get right to the point, right? "With Lee Adama. And... it's been going on for quite some time. Dualla doesn't know, Karl doesn't know... I only told Kara the other night."
She rested her head in her hands, not wanting to see what look Leoben would give her for the confession.
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"Do you love him?" he asked curiously, though hadn't Caprica proved that you didn't need love to conceive, even though she seemed somewhat enamored of Tigh? "Or is this only about sex?" he asked, somewhat bluntly. "I hope that wasn't offensive, sister, I'm just curious."
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"I understand Leoben," she still had to call him by name and not 'brother' because Sharon hadn't adapted that well just yet, "and I'm not offended. It's just that... I don't love him. He doesn't love me. But this has been going on for a long time and we can't seem to stop. It's like some kind of addiction, and even though we did manage to stop once, we picked up where we left off not too shortly after that."
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Leoben was quiet for a moment. "We're becoming...not human, of course, but something else. I don't even know the last time anyone called me Two. I sign things with a name I chose from nothing. We live with humans--you have born a child," he said, with a touch of reverence in his voice. "Perhaps it would have seemed strange to us, that maybe we would seek...what you have sought," he said delicately, seeking to be respectful. "But I think it is because we are evolving into something greater than we were before ( ... )
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"I want to stop, and I don't." It was still odd to think of it that way. "I've hurt him, he's hurt me, and somehow it makes it better that way. Less... complicated. We're both married to people who love us and are the 'safe' choice, so maybe we had to seek out other... venues?" Sharon hung her head again. At least Leoben wasn't judging her.
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"And of course you were a role model for them--pardon the pun," he said dryly. "You exhibited independence. And see how the rest of us followed suit."
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"Oh," she sighed, "I get it. And don't take this the wrong way because I love Kara, but I don't want to be like her. I don't want to need that."
She shook her head and stood, pacing. "I'm not a role model for anyone. Just because I'm the liaison, it doesn't mean I'm any better or worse than any other Cylon." Not that she really believed that.
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He watched her pace and quirked a smile at her words. "You don't have to pretend with me," he said, amused. "I will fully admit you are much better company than some of our other brethren." Leoben fell quiet for a moment, and his voice, when he spoke again, was soft.
"Have you seen the mural Kara painted in my bedroom? It's two stars in the darkness of space, a comet in the distance. It's supposed to be us--. Sam, for Kara, is Earth. Stability. Safety. Helo is that for you, the sun, rising bright and setting in darkness. What is Apollo, then, sister, if Helo is that which is always constant?"
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"I don't know," she admitted. "He's... unpredictable, but reliable in that unpredictability, if that makes sense." There was no way she thought she could have what Kara did, though. She had a daughter that wouldn't understand it. She had a very possessive husband who loved her and would beat the crap out of Lee once he found out -- Sharon remembered that night at the Dance when Karl had gotten the better of Lee.
"This is frakked up," she mumbled. "I don't know how you can do it, Leoben."
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"What do you mean?" he asked her curiously. "How I put up with Kara? That is, of course, a very good question. She's very...well. You know. " He waved a hand, though his voice was affectionate in a way it often wasn't around Kara herself.
"If you mean, how I do we do this, with the three of us?" He laughed. "Sometimes it's hard. But you see, I don't mind that Kara loves Sam. Love is infinite. And there is some balance between the three of us that makes this work where Kara and Sam, or Kara and I, would not." He gave Sharon a wry smile. "Sam might have a different answer. But he might not. I think even he realizes this is necessary, even if he doesn't like admitting it at times."
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"No, no, not Kara. How you can put up with Sam and Kara who are obviously in love." Although he was right; sometimes Kara made loving her a hard thing. How many female friends did Kara have, anyway?
"Oh, that's..." Odd, she thought to herself. "Great," she said aloud. It still didn't help her at the moment, though. She was supposed to be reliable, caring, the opposite of Kara. Sharon didn't frak around, so when people heard some scuttlebutt that Kara had, no one had been surprised.
"What if it's not love, though?" It was her last question, because it was really the only question that mattered.
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"What if you don't love Lee Adama? Sharon, why would you be willing to give up everything you have that makes you happy, if it isn't?"
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